For Mother's Day...
...my silly sister sent me the following in an email. They are answers given by elementary school students to some questions about mothers.
Why did God make moms?
1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. God made my mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts
What ingredients are mothers made of?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
1. We're related
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
What kind of little girl was your mom?
1. My mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.
What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
Why did your mom marry your dad?
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my mom eats a lot.
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
Who's the boss at your house?
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
What's the difference between moms and dads?
1. Moms work at work & work at home, & dads just go to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
What does your mom do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
What would it take to make your mom perfect?
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd say diet, maybe blue.
If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
Kids do, indeed, say the strangest things. My precocious daughter once identified my feelings quite accurately as she noticed me pacing back in forth in front of the window one afternoon. Vex had left me again (this one's name was Robyn, she was another one that he worked with...her birthday is April 25, I found that in an address book that I found hidden in my kitchen) and as usual, he kept in contact with me just enough to have a foot in the door. Anyway, he had picked up my son to take him to get his hair cut and I had a date that night. Remember, he left ME...anyway...he took so long that I was afraid that the two of them would meet each other. My 8 year old daughter sensed the situation, looked me right in the eyes and said, “This is a real Maalox moment, isn’t it?”
Vex had his own little bright saying later on. The two of them DID end up meeting and he immediately turned and left. He was barely gone long enough to find a phone when he called and said, “I thought we had something.” I responded by saying, “Yes, it was a called a marriage, and you left.”
Anyway, I think the kids really get you when they throw something back in your face that you have said to them. I would always remind my children to consider all of the possibilities before passing judgment on others. For example, once my son saw a barefoot kid and said, “Look, he isn’t wearing any shoes.” I told him that, “Maybe his family doesn’t have enough money to buy shoes.” I would say little things like that often. One night as I was tucking him into bed, I noticed through the window that the 2 year old across the street was still outside playing. I said, more to myself than anything else, “I can’t believe that baby girl is still outside, she should be in bed.” My 5 year old son reminded me of my own words when he said, “Mommy, maybe they can’t afford a bed.”
Well, that 5 year old is 27 now and he is in the living room watching a movie. I don’t get to be alone but I can always handle my kids, they can bug me anytime. I’m off to watch a movie with my kid, see ya!
Meg
...my silly sister sent me the following in an email. They are answers given by elementary school students to some questions about mothers.
Why did God make moms?
1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. God made my mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts
What ingredients are mothers made of?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
1. We're related
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
What kind of little girl was your mom?
1. My mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.
What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
Why did your mom marry your dad?
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my mom eats a lot.
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
Who's the boss at your house?
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
What's the difference between moms and dads?
1. Moms work at work & work at home, & dads just go to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
What does your mom do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
What would it take to make your mom perfect?
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd say diet, maybe blue.
If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
Kids do, indeed, say the strangest things. My precocious daughter once identified my feelings quite accurately as she noticed me pacing back in forth in front of the window one afternoon. Vex had left me again (this one's name was Robyn, she was another one that he worked with...her birthday is April 25, I found that in an address book that I found hidden in my kitchen) and as usual, he kept in contact with me just enough to have a foot in the door. Anyway, he had picked up my son to take him to get his hair cut and I had a date that night. Remember, he left ME...anyway...he took so long that I was afraid that the two of them would meet each other. My 8 year old daughter sensed the situation, looked me right in the eyes and said, “This is a real Maalox moment, isn’t it?”
Vex had his own little bright saying later on. The two of them DID end up meeting and he immediately turned and left. He was barely gone long enough to find a phone when he called and said, “I thought we had something.” I responded by saying, “Yes, it was a called a marriage, and you left.”
Anyway, I think the kids really get you when they throw something back in your face that you have said to them. I would always remind my children to consider all of the possibilities before passing judgment on others. For example, once my son saw a barefoot kid and said, “Look, he isn’t wearing any shoes.” I told him that, “Maybe his family doesn’t have enough money to buy shoes.” I would say little things like that often. One night as I was tucking him into bed, I noticed through the window that the 2 year old across the street was still outside playing. I said, more to myself than anything else, “I can’t believe that baby girl is still outside, she should be in bed.” My 5 year old son reminded me of my own words when he said, “Mommy, maybe they can’t afford a bed.”
If you are taking it easy for Mother's day, here is a site that is fun for killing some time:
Well, that 5 year old is 27 now and he is in the living room watching a movie. I don’t get to be alone but I can always handle my kids, they can bug me anytime. I’m off to watch a movie with my kid, see ya!
Meg
posted by Meg Kelso | 2:08 PM
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