Hi there!
I’m still a little fuzzy because I haven’t been up for very long. I was watching movies half the night and fell asleep in the recliner again which mean that I can only turn my head in one direction. When I sleep in the chair like that, my head falls to one side and I wake up with a dreadful neckache. I don’t even remember getting tired or falling asleep...I'm watching a movie one minute and I wake up with a stiff neck the next.
I don’t actually watch the movies, I rarely pay attention to what’s on TV. I do stare at it, but I have no idea of what’s going on. If someone else is there, they assume that I’m watching it which is good because it shuts them up. There is one guy I know that doesn’t shut up when I stare at the TV...that’s so annoying isn’t it? Two or more people agree to watch a movie and then one of them talks throughout the entire thing. I can stare at the TV, mindlessly nodding my head up and down and they just keep yakking away as though I’m hanging onto every word that they say. I am not good enough to respond appropriately any further than that, although sometimes I try.
Rick was very good at responding appropriately to whatever I was saying when I spoke to him without actually listening to what I was saying. He would grunt, snort or giggle at all the right times but he didn’t have a clue as to what I was talking about. It took awhile for me to figure that out. At some point, I realized that if what I said required more than a guttural response, he was dumbfounded.I started testing him at some point.
When I would suspect that he was doing the male version of “faking it”, I would ask him what I had just said. He could never tell me. I pointed his behavior out to him and he just snorted in acknowledgement that I had spoken.
Anyway, I’ve gotten good at watching TV without paying any attention to it. Last night I decided that I would not pay attention to Scarface, Stir of Echoes and Fargo. They were all DVD’s that I’ve had for a while so I know what they are all about. If ever I do pay the slightest bit of attention to the movies, I know what’s going on. But then, my mind wanders again and before you know it, I’m interviewing myself.
Have you ever done that? I’ve been interviewing myself for quite a while now. Actually, I’ve gotten very good at it. I’ve been thinking about trying out for Be Jerry Springer for a Day...you get to host the Jerry Springer Show. After all the years I’ve spent interviewing me, I think that I could do a pretty good job with a bunch of Rick’s and Rickette’s...don’t you?
In addition to being such a good interviewer, I’m a fascinating subject to BE interviewed. I’m quick witted, pleasant and, I must say, one all around charming individual. I show an interest in my interviewer without being the least bit superfluous. I actually enjoy my company, which is good, I’m usually all I’ve got. If I miss Rick, I just throw a pillow on the couch and look at the TV, that’s pretty much what is was like with him around...only better...the pillow doesn't fart into my couch like he did. Imagine sleeping on the couch, knowing that your head could be in the middle of a Rick fart. I put a sheet over the thing but I still find myself contemplating the half lives of fart molecules.
I have someone coming over for dinner tonight. We may or may not watch a movie but I know one thing for sure...I’d rather spend the evening on the couch, making out like a couple of banshees. This is the guy that I’ve known for a while and having been dating occasionally since last fall. I don’t see him very often, but his pretty self is always good for a nice romp on the couch. If there is any one guy that has the best shot at being with me on my divorce night, it’s him.
He would be the perfect choice, 30 something but he looks younger, tall (6’4” without being too skinny, hard to pull off.) AND extremely handsome. Well, he’s not as handsome as he is cute as a button...the ladies know what I mean. Oh...he has a large head of hair. Although I usually don’t like long hair on a man, this guy has the perfect length for his wavy hair. I could go on about the hair, but I don’t want to lose the bald guys out there.
I have no problem with bald men, Rick is bald and was bald when I met him. We were only 24 and he was already as bad as a doorknob. So, I won’t count you out for being bald...but damn it, I like to put my hands through a nice head of hair every so often. I believe that I shall do just that tonight.
Yep, I am not going to spend the evening confused like I do with that guy I told you about that barely goes past a handshake. I haven’t figured him out but the one who’s coming over tonight is the type that I wouldn’t have to worry about. If he didn’t make a move soon enough, I would feel perfectly comfortable doing it myself. Some guys make you feel like you can do that and some of them don’t.
Perhaps the difference is in the affect of the man, if he is a happier, more relaxed kind of guy, I feel as though he is pretty much game for anything and I feel more relaxed. Some men make you feel like you can be yourself and some men make you feel like you have to behave in a certain manner. It isn’t as though you are pretending to be something that you’re not, it’s just that you have to actively consider everything that you do or say before you do or say it. When I feel like that, I can’t be very natural and I like guys who make me feel like I can just be myself.
Myself is a woman who would have no qualms about saying to Mr. Tonight, “Won’t you lay me down in the tall grass and let me do my stuff.” That’s why it’s so annoying to be in this position. I missed a few really good opportunities because Rick expected me to be faithful, what with all that marriage and fidelity crap. Anyway, on September 9th it will be a year and now I’m going without so that I can say it’s been a year that I've gone without. At this point it’s pretty much a challenge and I’m almost there. In about 2 weeks it will have been a year.
During my IBM (in between marriages) years, I once went for 6 months without and that amazed me. To be able to say that I went without for an entire year is pretty good for me. For the first 6 or 7 years of our marriage, I got it 29 nights out of every month. It was a necessity, I would be a bitch in the morning if I didn’t get any the night before.
Actually, that sort of explains this blog. You’ll know when I start getting some because I will be a much, much nicer person.
Gotta go...see ya.
Meg
meg.kelso@gmail.com
I’m still a little fuzzy because I haven’t been up for very long. I was watching movies half the night and fell asleep in the recliner again which mean that I can only turn my head in one direction. When I sleep in the chair like that, my head falls to one side and I wake up with a dreadful neckache. I don’t even remember getting tired or falling asleep...I'm watching a movie one minute and I wake up with a stiff neck the next.
I don’t actually watch the movies, I rarely pay attention to what’s on TV. I do stare at it, but I have no idea of what’s going on. If someone else is there, they assume that I’m watching it which is good because it shuts them up. There is one guy I know that doesn’t shut up when I stare at the TV...that’s so annoying isn’t it? Two or more people agree to watch a movie and then one of them talks throughout the entire thing. I can stare at the TV, mindlessly nodding my head up and down and they just keep yakking away as though I’m hanging onto every word that they say. I am not good enough to respond appropriately any further than that, although sometimes I try.
Rick was very good at responding appropriately to whatever I was saying when I spoke to him without actually listening to what I was saying. He would grunt, snort or giggle at all the right times but he didn’t have a clue as to what I was talking about. It took awhile for me to figure that out. At some point, I realized that if what I said required more than a guttural response, he was dumbfounded.I started testing him at some point.
When I would suspect that he was doing the male version of “faking it”, I would ask him what I had just said. He could never tell me. I pointed his behavior out to him and he just snorted in acknowledgement that I had spoken.
Anyway, I’ve gotten good at watching TV without paying any attention to it. Last night I decided that I would not pay attention to Scarface, Stir of Echoes and Fargo. They were all DVD’s that I’ve had for a while so I know what they are all about. If ever I do pay the slightest bit of attention to the movies, I know what’s going on. But then, my mind wanders again and before you know it, I’m interviewing myself.
Have you ever done that? I’ve been interviewing myself for quite a while now. Actually, I’ve gotten very good at it. I’ve been thinking about trying out for Be Jerry Springer for a Day...you get to host the Jerry Springer Show. After all the years I’ve spent interviewing me, I think that I could do a pretty good job with a bunch of Rick’s and Rickette’s...don’t you?
In addition to being such a good interviewer, I’m a fascinating subject to BE interviewed. I’m quick witted, pleasant and, I must say, one all around charming individual. I show an interest in my interviewer without being the least bit superfluous. I actually enjoy my company, which is good, I’m usually all I’ve got. If I miss Rick, I just throw a pillow on the couch and look at the TV, that’s pretty much what is was like with him around...only better...the pillow doesn't fart into my couch like he did. Imagine sleeping on the couch, knowing that your head could be in the middle of a Rick fart. I put a sheet over the thing but I still find myself contemplating the half lives of fart molecules.
I have someone coming over for dinner tonight. We may or may not watch a movie but I know one thing for sure...I’d rather spend the evening on the couch, making out like a couple of banshees. This is the guy that I’ve known for a while and having been dating occasionally since last fall. I don’t see him very often, but his pretty self is always good for a nice romp on the couch. If there is any one guy that has the best shot at being with me on my divorce night, it’s him.
He would be the perfect choice, 30 something but he looks younger, tall (6’4” without being too skinny, hard to pull off.) AND extremely handsome. Well, he’s not as handsome as he is cute as a button...the ladies know what I mean. Oh...he has a large head of hair. Although I usually don’t like long hair on a man, this guy has the perfect length for his wavy hair. I could go on about the hair, but I don’t want to lose the bald guys out there.
I have no problem with bald men, Rick is bald and was bald when I met him. We were only 24 and he was already as bad as a doorknob. So, I won’t count you out for being bald...but damn it, I like to put my hands through a nice head of hair every so often. I believe that I shall do just that tonight.
Yep, I am not going to spend the evening confused like I do with that guy I told you about that barely goes past a handshake. I haven’t figured him out but the one who’s coming over tonight is the type that I wouldn’t have to worry about. If he didn’t make a move soon enough, I would feel perfectly comfortable doing it myself. Some guys make you feel like you can do that and some of them don’t.
Perhaps the difference is in the affect of the man, if he is a happier, more relaxed kind of guy, I feel as though he is pretty much game for anything and I feel more relaxed. Some men make you feel like you can be yourself and some men make you feel like you have to behave in a certain manner. It isn’t as though you are pretending to be something that you’re not, it’s just that you have to actively consider everything that you do or say before you do or say it. When I feel like that, I can’t be very natural and I like guys who make me feel like I can just be myself.
Myself is a woman who would have no qualms about saying to Mr. Tonight, “Won’t you lay me down in the tall grass and let me do my stuff.” That’s why it’s so annoying to be in this position. I missed a few really good opportunities because Rick expected me to be faithful, what with all that marriage and fidelity crap. Anyway, on September 9th it will be a year and now I’m going without so that I can say it’s been a year that I've gone without. At this point it’s pretty much a challenge and I’m almost there. In about 2 weeks it will have been a year.
During my IBM (in between marriages) years, I once went for 6 months without and that amazed me. To be able to say that I went without for an entire year is pretty good for me. For the first 6 or 7 years of our marriage, I got it 29 nights out of every month. It was a necessity, I would be a bitch in the morning if I didn’t get any the night before.
Actually, that sort of explains this blog. You’ll know when I start getting some because I will be a much, much nicer person.
Gotta go...see ya.
Meg
meg.kelso@gmail.com
posted by Meg Kelso | 12:12 PM
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