Little Boy Fauntleroy and the Lollipop

What the hell are these two yahoos supposed to be in this picture? Is Pitt taking on a new role as Errol Flynn? Is MaMa taking on a new role as a lollipop? Tell me something...if your head is already so disproportionately larger than your body, would you make it worse by wearing big hair on that big head? I wouldn't advise it. I don't know what sort of circus mirror she had to use that made her think this was a good way to leave the house but I'd like one for my grandkids.

And then we have the dashing Mr. Pitt in his silk scarf. I pray that it wasn't his idea to put that thing on. I sort of suspect MaMa had something to do with the ostentatious little accessory and I hope that Brad got, at the very least, a nice blow job for wearing it. That's about the only reason that a real man would go out in public with a scarf that must be tended to all night lest it fall out of it's perfect placement. Most men just want to get your clothes OFF, they don't want to have to worry about keeping their own clothes ON. Yep, only a man assured of sex would go out of the house in that gay scarf. Of course, someone like Perez Hilton could do it too, he has so little hope of attracting a man, woman or something in between that it really doesn't matter. That's some serious "freedom's just another word for nothing left to loose" attitude he carries with him.

If Perez DID attract someone (potentially using tequila sunrises to ply his date) to his home, how would he explain the mess? Have you SEEN his place? Most people, especially chicks and gay guys, get a little grossed out at fast food trash with hardened pieces of old hamburgers lying around. Only some nut with a trash fetish would enjoy sitting down where Hilton calls Dump Sweet Dump.

Anyway, enough about despicable gay men who hold no respect for women and back to despicable hetero men who hold no respect for women.

I don't really think there's any way for a man to look good with that scarf on but I know for damn sure that Pitt's addition of the moustache du jour from 1934 only made the entire look a tad more humorous. To add to the comic delight, take a look at the way he swankers in with one hand in his pocket (???) and the other around his lollipop. The look on his face assures us all that the hair out of place on his forehead was put there on purpose and while using a good dollop of styling gel.

Brad's pretentious ensemble only serves to highlight the numerous tattoos on the body of his date prompting the question, "How much did he pay for the tattoo lady with the lollipop body?" Do you have to pay freak prices or is it all just one big carnival affair for everyone in Hollywood these days?