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Saturday, April 11, 2009

Rejection doesn't have to be a totally negative experience!

I’ve been rejected by men in a few different ways. After all, I’ve done my share of rejecting as well and there are only so many ways to go about doing it. Personally, I prefer the upfront method…a warm hand shake, a “Have a nice life!” and away I go.

Of course, if I’m rejecting you because you’ve frightened me, I’ll have you take me to my pool team’s home bar under the guise of shooting a game of pool or having a margarita. In the evening, there is always SOMEONE who I know well enough to ask for a ride home. I wait for your scary ass to go to the can and then my buddy and I escape before you pull out the lizard. And no, I don’t feel guilty. It’s the one way to assure that no one gets hurt…especially me.

Unless a guy won’t get the hint, I generally don’t reject them by phone and I’m sure I’ve never rejected anyone by email. I may have OFFENDED them by email to the point where they didn’t think a response necessary…but I never sent an outright “Dear John” email. If I were to do so, knowing me, I would find the truth as easy as any silly line of BS…especially if all I have to face is a monitor full of my own words. It’s cowardly enough to lie. It takes a special kind of coward to lie by email. That takes a serious Scaramouch… … and guess what, I found one!

Once again, as usual, I don’t really mind. I’m not a stalker and it takes a helluva lot more than one date for me to really give a shit so it’s all good. Actually, it’s all great. These yahoos give me fodder for you guys and that makes it time well spent. This guy’s email should evoke more than a few chortles.

I suppose I should set the scene for you first. The guy owns a landscaping business and I need one of those more than I need a man but if there’s a landscaping company with a man attached to it, I’m game. So, after hearing my sad tale of tall grass and pine needles, the nice man offered to come over and help me out last Saturday. I was only wearing knock-about clothes and no make-up…but I really needed the use of his leaf blower so I jumped on the chance.

He came over and worked for a while and then he decided to come back the next day with more appropriate equipment. Apparently his industrial size back pack leaf blower was no match for my pine needles. Whatever.

By the next day, I was back to raking a bagful of pine needles a day and assuming that leaf blower dude would find something better to do on a Sunday than my yard work. I didn’t really feel like entertaining him and when a guy works up a sweat on your behalf, the polite thing to do is invite him in and feed the bastard. That would have meant that in addition to bagging pine needles, I would have had to clean my house and come up with something tasty for the help. My freezer contains a bag of French bread from January, about 5 bags of various types of frozen vegetables and a pack of hot Italian sausage that I accidentally bought and I hate hot Italian sausage. Oh yeah, there’s ice in there too.

The bottom line is that I didn’t hear from him at all on Sunday. But…Monday morning I did receive this chortle producing email from him:

“Sorry I missed you yesterday,I was very busy making plans,decided to move back to South Florida,I have lots of tools that I will be selling,so if You need somethings,let Me know!”

If I wanted to, I could have corrected his spelling and grammar but I thought it added to the spirit of the email, showing his intense desire to get away from all things me.

Leaving town AND offering to sell me stuff. That’s priceless.

Strike 3!

3 Comments:

Blogger Unknown said...

Sorry....I haven't been checking in as much as I should ...computer woes....

Going back a few posts ....about the chick moving in on your date......this is a question for you and other gal's out there ....
I think ...( because it's happened to me...)That some women will flirt with...try and move in on a guy because they think it's safe ...because he's with another woman, he won't do anything....this because they JUST HAVE TO FLIRT..or make their guy jealous because he isn't paying enough attention to her. WHY?

Now a real man..um well anyway... some guys are loyal to their woman...but stupid ... some guys think " okay we are out ...talking to other people ...don't wanna be rude ...talk to the flirt..yeah look like you have some smarts here ...be polite.WRONG!!! hey guys ...there is no good that comes from this ...nope none at all ..Look if her jealous boyfriend doesn't kick your ass...then rest assure your woman will ...and I'm still working on what was ...ummm I mean what would be worse. To you women out there who just have to be a flirt and flirt with every guy ..thanks ..."NOT". To the guys who know where I'm coming from...some advice ...learn to become a "Bobble Head" Smile ... nod....and keep you mouth shut.

April 11, 2009  
Blogger Unknown said...

Oh and Meg dear.....I'm sorry ...but I think this is the problem we face and I have no answer as to what can be done .....We are faced with a catch 22..we are set in our ways..
we are not willing to put up with the bullshit of anyone younger than us.....and anyone our age or older do not want to put up with our bullshit because we ARE in mind and spirit younger than they are and not afraid to show it...and that scares them....Damn it too many of them and not enough of us....

April 11, 2009  
Blogger Meg Kelso said...

You know dude, I only need one. And he's out there somewhere! Perhaps I should start hanging out in nursing homes so that I can be the "young chick" down the hall!

April 12, 2009  

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