Hello y'all!!!

Yesterday I was discharged from the hospital AGAIN so I have to apologize for my absence of late. But, I have a really cool January for you guys to look forward to. I can finally let loose with a secret because a "joke" that's been going on for years has finally, after all these years, come to a conclusion. The "punch line" has been thrown and after you tell the punch line once, the gig is up and it's no longer a worthwhile joke to tell.

I have been in on a secret that I can't believe I kept for this long. Ya see...this is what went down:

My friend (Kelly) was divorced over 3 years ago. Before she and her husband separated, he gave her the password to his e-mail account and permission to go on whenever she wanted to. Somehow he was stupid enough to forget that he gave her the password because he never changed it. NEVER. EVER. NOT ONCE.

Over the past few years, Kelly has been reading her ex's e-mails. She has had access to every single e-mail that her ex has sent to other women since before they were separated...and in all the years since. She has had access to his bank accounts during an entire divorce where he tried to hide money but somehow could not seem to do it. She has read all of the e-mails, from his friends, his lawyers, his family and HER SISTER!!! Yep, Kelly's own sister has been in contact with Kelly's ex and not in a good way. Eventually I'll post those so you'll see what I mean.

This is going to be good.

If you think about your main e-mail account and everything in it, you'll see how easy it is to garner more than enough information about the owner of any given e-mail account. Kelly has basically been INSIDE her ex's head for years and he has had no clue. Join me as I let you into the mind of a true nimrod. I don't know how Kelly was able to keep her mouth shut for so long...I doubt that I could have done it myself. Sooner or later something would have made me so mad that I would have let the cat out of the bag. But somehow, Kelly kept her secret to herself...and me.

Even after she read negative things that her own sister told the ex, she would chat on the phone with the sister as though nothing had happened. That alone would have made me give up the secret. But not Kelly.

She read e-mails that her ex wrote to girlfriends, relatives and legal advice websites. He has a dreadful habit of lying to make himself look good and Kelly look bad, so, when he wrote to girlfriends about his evil ex, his stories vaguely resembled the truth. You, too, will be able to laugh as you read the ramblings of a slightly warped, bi-polar and totally dishonest mind.

After Kelly kept her secret very close, the ex suddenly (and finally!) changed his password. I never would have imagined that he would have gone this long without changing it but luckily for me and you, he absolutely DID go this long without performing the most basic of all computer security measures. We don't know why he finally DID decide to change the password but now that he has, the "gig is up" so there's no reason not to enjoy what's left.

When Kelly first told me about this a few years ago, I told her that I would keep her secret but when the shit hit the fan, I wanted to be able to write about it all. So, my loyalty and Kelly's undying patience have finally paid off. The day has come when I can post the inanity of a man going through a divorce. Come see the desperation, the manipulation and the mental deterioration of a man on his way out of love. It WILL be fun.

:):):)