I made a huge pot of beef stew...

...and put it on simmer so that the meat would be nice and tender. And then...I forgot about it. So...I seem to have a large piece of beef jerky with vegetables. Aah, that’s all right, I’ll just put ketchup on it. I need to go to bed soon so I can wake up before the noon news tomorrow. I seem to be getting these tremendous bursts of energy...right around bedtime, and I start a project. I just caught myself going for the ironing board and decided that I better just write something and getteth my butt horizontal before 11.

I was wondering whether or not you guys had decided on my birthday present yet. I thought some of you might like me to drop a few hints so I will. I don’t want to end up with something that I have to return...or keep just to spare your feelings.

I learned very early that Vex had no clue when it came to gift giving. Somehow, we managed to be broken up during every gift giving occasion that came around before we got married. Looking back, that couldn’t have been an accident. Anyway, we were married in September and for Christmas, I got a pair of what I thought wear cat earrings. I asked, “Are these cats?”

He responded, “No...they’re mice.”

“Mice?”, I queried?

“Yeah, remember that mouse we caught in October?”

We had, indeed, caught a mouse that past October. Thank God it wasn’t a cockroach.

Hint to self: Never stay with a man who gives you vermin for Christmas.

Then there was the doll that you wound up only to have it twirl it’s head as it played, “These are a Few of my Favorite Things.”

I had one question...did he go out LOOKING for these things specifically, or did he just happen come across them and say, “AH! Now, she’d LOVE that!” I finally taught him that you can’t go wrong with tasteful, precious gem stud earrings. I have the diamonds, the sapphires, and the emeralds. He left before getting me the rubies. Ain‘t that a bitch? (This is really, really a good idea for a stumped husband, you can’t go wrong and they aren’t terribly expensive.)

Oh well, I haven’t decided whether I want you guys to pitch in on one big gift or whether I want a whole lot of little presents. They both have their advantages. I’m really pretty easy to please, I don’t think I was unreasonable about the mouse earrings, I’m pretty sure he just picked the first thing that he saw at Big Lots. That boy LOOOOVED Big Lots. I don’t care whether or not my next man has a whole lot of money, I just don’t want him shopping for me at Big Lots.

Oh, I caught a few minutes of Dr. Phil today. He had this chick on the show that made absolutely no secret at all of the fact that she was a gold-digger and she was quite obnoxious about it. Dr. Phil, as well as the audience, was rather disapproving of her as you can imagine. They taped her in bar settings and she really was insufferable in her approach toward men. They set her up at a bar with a handsome bartender that she totally blew off. He turned out to be some business tycoon. Everybody laughed at her and chastised the woman for being so “superficial”.

PUL-EEEZE...GIVE ME A BREAK!!!!

Like that millionaire dude would have glanced at her twice if she hadn’t have been stunning in the first place. Sure, the woman dismissed those guys who didn’t “measure” up out of hand, and she said so willingly.

But a man can do the same thing. The difference is that he does it in a manner in which you don’t even know you’ve been rejected...he simply doesn’t engage you in eye contact, much less conversation. Even Dr. Phil, champion of the victims of superficial women...didn’t marry a dog. Can you think of a man who has millions and is married to a beast? OK, anybody outside of the Clintons, that’s too easy.(I just now called my brother to see if he could think of a better example than the Clinton’s, he couldn’t come up with any either.) So, my challenge to you...wise readers...is to come up with ONE multi-millionaire who is married to a skank ...or even a very pretty heavy-set chick.

So, until rich men start marrying a few funky looking women...let’s just leave that poor gold-digger and her type alone, shall we?

Oh, my birthday present...I just thought of something that isn’t terribly expensive nor is it difficult. As you may have seen, I figured out how to put that AdSense thingie over to the left side at the bottom of the Archives section...you could just go over there and click on the advertisements...that isn’t asking too much...is it? I'm curious to see if it is worth having that thing there or not.

Then, you all have to stand at your computer and sing, “Happy Birthday to Meg.” That’s all.

Well, I better go to sleep now.

See ya!

Meg