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Sunday, October 30, 2005

I just did something stupid...

...and I feel like a jack ass. I am quite sure that my face is still red. The first thing I do every morning is take the dog out. It’s so early that it’s still dark and I thought, what the hell, I’ll just go outside in my panties and t-shirt, no one can see me.

So, I tripped the motion detector lights and stood there stunned for a moment, standing in the only well lit area for a block, trying to figure out what to do....just run back in the house or pull the t-shirt down. I started pulling the t-shirt down and right then the cop who answered the call when my house was broken into pulled up next to my house to say hello since he saw me standing out there. I was behind the car and he asked me if I ever found my hammer so that he could fix my door. I didn’t know what to say, and what’s more, I couldn’t move closer to him to say it. I was hoping that he would stay in his car.

So, of course, he got out of his car and started walking up the driveway. Now I was wondering what the penalty for public indecency was and wondering if he would let me get some pants on before he hauled me down to the pokey. All of a sudden, I noticed a rug that I had hung over the fence behind me so I grabbed it and wrapped it around my waist. I was standing there with a black Jerry Springer shirt on and a blue shag rug around my waist.

He took one look at me and laughed. I wish that I could say I was laughing too. But I don’t think the humor of that situation will hit me for a day or so. I can appreciate why HE was laughing, but it won’t strike me as funny for a while. Certainly not until I warm up, it’s cold out there.

I never planned on staying out there for so long, closer to being naked than I was dressed. I need to remember to at least put on my robe from now on. Oh, and my slippers. My feet are still cold.

OK then, this could be the low point of my day and things will only be getting better, or it’s one of those days that is going to go downhill. I just can’t wait to find out.

Uh oh...it’s gonna go downhill. Do you remember hard lip dude who tried to make out with me on the bench after I told him how much I hated being hit on by men I barely know? Well, he just called. I didn’t answer the phone, That had to be two months ago and he hasn’t stopped calling. I cannot BELIEVE that a man would try for so long when he gets no answer....EVER. I suppose he’s decided to call me at this hideous hour to see if he could catch me too sleepy to avoid answering my phone.

I’m still waiting for the coffee to kick in. I had to go into my car to get creamer because I never did go get milk yesterday. I pulled on some jammy pants to do that, I’m not taking anymore chances.

My son drive my Kia to the auto parts store yesterday and told me that those lights all over the dashboard meant something. I told him not to tell me until he could fix them, I don’t want to know. As far as I’m concerned, if a car moves when I push the gas petal, it works.

Well, I finished doing nothing yesterday so today I have to do something. I’m not sure what, but I’m gonna go take a shower and get ready to do whatever strikes me as fun. I could go to the store and toss douche bags in men’s shopping carts, that’s ALWAYS fun for a laugh.

OK, then. I’m going to explore my local environment for something to do.

See ya,

Meg

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