I received a couple comments...

...to the panty post below suggesting that I should "get over it". I get those every so often, not too often because most people know that I rarely rag on Rick anymore. (I love alliteration!) We actually get along.

I just wanted to make a point. If a person commits a crime against another person, they get closure in the legal system. They get to see the fiend carted off to jail and then they know that they've received justice. I don't want Rick to go to jail...I simply want an apology.

They don't give you closure in divorce court. They give you alimony. They give you permission to screw other people. They give you whatever they think you should have. But, they don't give you an apology and they don't direct one from the person who harmed you. So, I don't get closure. And to make matters worse, we never had a chance to hold each other and cry over the death of our marriage. I thought we deserved that and would have had one last hug coming. But I never got that either. One day I had a husband and the next day I didn't. That's all. No explanation, no honesty...just a man running away.

You guys have no clue what he did to me. I KNEW something was going on yet I so wanted to believe him. He was so damned good at lying that he told me that I need to go see a shrink for my "trust issues". I DID! Once I told him that his cheating was "driving me crazy". He said, "You're doing it to yourself."

When a man looks at you, says he loves you and then says that you're suspicions are unfounded, you want to believe him. Especially when he sends you to a nut doctor to deal with your psychological deficits that don't even exist. I went to a doctor to have a non-existent problem fixed. Who would stand by and watch a person go through that pain if they were actually cheating? My mind just couldn't accept that my husband was that diabolical. He was.

When I hear him lie now, I wonder...was he always this bad and was I always stupid enough to believe him? Or is he slipping? I can't tell. I can tell he's lying because the BS is just so lame it's laughable. His "default greeting" on the answering machine is an old lady who awkwardly giggles her way through a phone message. Then, the default greeting answers the phone and responds to specific questions. Great software no doubt.

I'm not gut wrenching angry anymore. I'm sort of "group angry". I think that people like Solaris know what I mean. At this point we're mad at ALL cheaters. I'm no angrier at Rick than I am at Sol's hubby. And that moron on Divorce Court yesterday just made me cringe when he lied over and over again. It brought it all back to me. That's what prompted the post. I got it out of my system and now I'm fine.

OK then. I have to make a video for you. It will be answering a particular statement:

"...Did that person ever apologize for telling me to fuck off?..."

I am "that person"...the one who didn't "apologize for telling" a person to fuck off. I almost answered it here but then I decided that it would be a good subject for me to deliver in person. So, I shall. I'll be right back after I do that.

Ciao!