FREE PUSSY!!!
The perks of penning a blog...
...are many. One of them is that when I write about someone, someplace or some thing...I hear from the people involved. This morning I heard from the Pussy people and I couldn't be more thrilled:
Hi Meg, I work in the marketing dept, email me your address and i'll send you some samples!
You may or may not know this about me but I am a coupon addict. I clip coupons like crazy. I'll starve to death before I buy something that isn't A) on sale, and B) a double off coupon. Occasionally I'm lucky enough to find a store that is TRIPLING the coupons!
The only thing better than a tripled coupon is a free coupon...especially when I didn't have to buy 2 of something to get the third one free. And, it seems as though I am in for some free Pussy. The Pussy people are sending me some samples. I doubt coupons would do any good because I haven't seen the first can of Pussy on American shelves.
My friend who just got back from Cannes told me about it. Then I get a comment saying "...Pussy Natural Energy drink is indeed sweeping through France but also recently launched in the UK..." And you know those Europeans...if they can make money on us stupid colonists, they will. And why not? If every person who heard about Pussy tried it, the Pussy people would make a pretty ha' pence.
Besides, who doesn't want to be able to say that they have, indeed, sucked Pussy? I know I do. So far, I have not sucked one Pussy...although I have served it a time or 5,000. But seriously, I shall wait patiently for my Pussy.
Now, I hope those guys don't take too long, I would hate to get blue tongue from persistent Pussy anticipation. Oh Jeez, I don't know if I CAN wait...please overnight me that Pussy...I HAVE to have it!
Hopefully my Pussy will come soon. When it does, I'll sit (or lie) back, enjoy it, smoke a cigarette and then I'll come here and tell you about my Pussy and how it good it is.
I was just thinking that it's a good thing that Anita Hill wasn't drinking Pussy when she worked for Clarence Thomas. She would have had to testify that there was a pubic hair on her Pussy. Scott's people would have called for DNA and unless Anita hid that pube a la Monica's blue dress...say in a heart shaped locket...if the pube don't match, it wasn't his snatch. Or is snatch specifically female? I don't know...but you know who's crotch I'm talking about. That Supreme Court dude and his crotch. Ooh, Judicial Crotch...I've never had any.
Speaking of crotch's, have you ever watched a football game and thought to yourself, "There are a LOT of penis's down on that field!" Then you look around and realize, "Hell, this place is crawling with them! Penis galore!" All they'd have to do is pull their pants down and we'd see all of the penis's flopping around. Sometimes I look at a guy and think, "Nothing separates me from that penis except a small layer of cloth...if I really wanted to I could get at that bastard." A belt buckle isn't really good security.
OK. So I'm waiting for my Pussy. As soon as it gets here I'll tell you guys all about it. I'm sure that it will be great Pussy, after all, it IS all natural.
UPDATE: I just heard from the people who bottle the drink Pussy. They would rather I not speak of "sucking Pussy" so I will abide by their wishes. They state that it is "very up market and clean". I will respect the wishes of the company and will funnel my salacious efforts in other directions in the future.
:)
...are many. One of them is that when I write about someone, someplace or some thing...I hear from the people involved. This morning I heard from the Pussy people and I couldn't be more thrilled:
Hi Meg, I work in the marketing dept, email me your address and i'll send you some samples!
You may or may not know this about me but I am a coupon addict. I clip coupons like crazy. I'll starve to death before I buy something that isn't A) on sale, and B) a double off coupon. Occasionally I'm lucky enough to find a store that is TRIPLING the coupons!
The only thing better than a tripled coupon is a free coupon...especially when I didn't have to buy 2 of something to get the third one free. And, it seems as though I am in for some free Pussy. The Pussy people are sending me some samples. I doubt coupons would do any good because I haven't seen the first can of Pussy on American shelves.
My friend who just got back from Cannes told me about it. Then I get a comment saying "...Pussy Natural Energy drink is indeed sweeping through France but also recently launched in the UK..." And you know those Europeans...if they can make money on us stupid colonists, they will. And why not? If every person who heard about Pussy tried it, the Pussy people would make a pretty ha' pence.
Besides, who doesn't want to be able to say that they have, indeed, sucked Pussy? I know I do. So far, I have not sucked one Pussy...although I have served it a time or 5,000. But seriously, I shall wait patiently for my Pussy.
Now, I hope those guys don't take too long, I would hate to get blue tongue from persistent Pussy anticipation. Oh Jeez, I don't know if I CAN wait...please overnight me that Pussy...I HAVE to have it!
Hopefully my Pussy will come soon. When it does, I'll sit (or lie) back, enjoy it, smoke a cigarette and then I'll come here and tell you about my Pussy and how it good it is.
I was just thinking that it's a good thing that Anita Hill wasn't drinking Pussy when she worked for Clarence Thomas. She would have had to testify that there was a pubic hair on her Pussy. Scott's people would have called for DNA and unless Anita hid that pube a la Monica's blue dress...say in a heart shaped locket...if the pube don't match, it wasn't his snatch. Or is snatch specifically female? I don't know...but you know who's crotch I'm talking about. That Supreme Court dude and his crotch. Ooh, Judicial Crotch...I've never had any.
Speaking of crotch's, have you ever watched a football game and thought to yourself, "There are a LOT of penis's down on that field!" Then you look around and realize, "Hell, this place is crawling with them! Penis galore!" All they'd have to do is pull their pants down and we'd see all of the penis's flopping around. Sometimes I look at a guy and think, "Nothing separates me from that penis except a small layer of cloth...if I really wanted to I could get at that bastard." A belt buckle isn't really good security.
OK. So I'm waiting for my Pussy. As soon as it gets here I'll tell you guys all about it. I'm sure that it will be great Pussy, after all, it IS all natural.
UPDATE: I just heard from the people who bottle the drink Pussy. They would rather I not speak of "sucking Pussy" so I will abide by their wishes. They state that it is "very up market and clean". I will respect the wishes of the company and will funnel my salacious efforts in other directions in the future.
:)
posted by Meg Kelso | 4:25 AM
1 Comments:
Uh...let's not make any rash decisions...
Post a Comment
<< Home