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Hi. I'm trying to think of another description to put here. Any ideas? I'll try again at 420.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

This morning I'm a little giddy...

...so that news clipping was quite funny to me. Maybe it's because I can't feel too sorry for a Hooter's waitress who applies for a job as a man toy and then gets upset when the men play with her. Maybe it's because it really IS funny. What do you think ? Does this woman have a lawsuit? (And I don't mean attire for an attorney.)

I guess you would have had to have been there to know for sure. If all they said was, "You have a chance to win a toy Yoda!", she probably doesn't. If they went further to make the servers think they would win a car, then perhaps. I'm not an attorney so I don't know. But I come from a family full of attorneys so perhaps one of them will read this and let me know....Steve? Dad? TJ? It seems to me that the blindfolded walk into the parking lot made things worse.

Oh well. That chick does NOT look happy at all, does she? The fact that she even found a lawyer to take her case means that she probably does have a chance. I can't wait to see what how this one turns out.

My molly is huge pregnant again. I think I'll induce labor today by changing the water in the aquarium. That stupid molly has two groups of fish in there already and I think the older ones are most likely old enough to reproduce as well. I guess I'll find out when they blow up like this one does every month. Mollys get laid once and that one roll in the gravel keeps them getting pregnant over and over again for months. The last group that she had was the first group of which more than 2 survived. Actually, about 50 of them survived so I have a tankful of youngster's in there. She's ready to go again and she will, as soon as I change out some of the tank water. Then, I will be able to say that I have over 100 critters in my house.

Now, what to do with those suckers! Our local paper runs free ads if you advertise something for free. That's how I get rid of the scum suckers when they get too big for the tank. I advertise them for someone with a pond or a HUUUGE freshwater tank. It took a while for me to figure that one out, I had one scumsucker that got to be a foot long. I would ask people what to do with it and every guy I asked said, "Flush it down the toilet." Well, I couldn't do that.

I was ready to just take it to PetSmart and drop it stealthily in one of their tanks when my son told me about the newspaper so I started giving the fish away like that. But now I have SO many that I'd be lucky to find enough people to GIVE them to. If anyone out there want's a molly, come and get it. I won't give them ALL away at once, they're not going to end up as food for some other fish. The only way to ensure that without charging for them is to make people drive over here to get a couple or maybe even a few, but the ride wouldn't be worth it to someone who wanted enough to use them as feeder fish.

I could keep a bunch, but I'd have to have them fixed first and I don't know of any doctors who perform sterilization surgery on fish. I don't even know one that can perform surgery underwater and with a fish, that's pretty much what it would take. Ain't that a bitch? Fish get no surgery because they live in water. All of the anesthesia machines are for air breathers. I guess a crab or an octopus would have to create the underwater version of that machine...they have appendages that could be considered as close to opposable thumbs as you'll find on any animals.

In the meantime, the best that I can do is induce labor by shocking her into dropping those fish. She'll thank me for it tomorrow.

I wish I could figure out how to get the tank close enough to tape it for you. If I could film that bitch giving birth, it'd be pretty cool, wouldn't it? Well, they've finished eating so I can do it at any time now.

OK. My dog has gotten extremely verbal lately. I think he's figured out that he can get my attention instead of just waiting for me to do what he wants. It's like that dog had an epiphany and just started talking one day. It was cute for a day and a half and now its just annoying. He will sit there and softly say, "Ar ar ar arrrrrrr." If I respond correctly, he goes "AR AR AA AARRRR!" If I don't, he keeps on talking as though it will help. I bet he thinks the same thing I do..."You would think that after all this time she would KNOW that I want ice in my water!"

He wakes me up like that now. Every morning as soon as it gets light out, he wakes me up. He doesn't want anything, not even to go outside. The only thing that I can figure is that he doesn't want me to sleep anymore. He's a great alarm clock...if I need one at daybreak. When I need an alarm clock I usually need it earlier than that so he's pretty useless to me.

I have so much stuff to do today that I don't even want to get up from this desk. As soon as I do I need to jump in the shower and start my day which will end when I get done with my pool league tonight.

DAMN IT! I tried to set the clock on the fancy Cuisinart coffee-maker that my daughter gave me a couple of Christmas's ago. I did it wrong but while I was messing with it, somehow I set the carafe warmer to stop warming after the coffee is done. I can't have it kept warm for any length of time. I just don't know what I did and I don't know how to undo it. Drats.

I just convinced myself that I have nothing to write about and therefore I should let you go about your day. See ya after the birth! Oh, I AM going to TRY to move the credenza so that I can tape the birth. I might have that up here later.

See ya!


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