Ouch.

Tatsuya Ichihashi, the prime suspect in the 2007 murder case of British language school teacher Lindsay Ann Hawker, is shown before, left, and after cosmetic surgeries. (AP Photo/Chiba Prefectural Gyotoku Police)

This dude was serious about not being arrested...he performed plastic surgery on himself in an attempt to evade capture. I must admit, I never thought of that. I did perform minor surgery on my friends' dog and I removed sutures from my kids when they would damage the integrity of their integumentary system. Add to that my desire to be rid of a turkey gobbler type thing that hangs under my chin, you'd of thunk I would have at least THOUGHT of operating on myself.

I could probably do it if I had to, but I don't have to. And, of course, I have no lidocaine with which I could make numb my neck flesh. Deep down I'm a coward compared to the creepy and desperate murderer pictured above.

Considering the lengths some people go to when trying to look younger, I'm surprised more of them haven't taken a can-do outlook and grabbed a box cutter. After all, Botox doesn't even TRY to hide what it is, it's in the name, botulism toxin. Yet people line up for that and even have parties where everyone gets a little needle-full of toxin injected into their face. I never seem to get invited to those parties so I can't say it's a bad idea but I would probably decline my invite out of hand. Botulism and toxin are two things that I try to steer clear of.

But...if I had that lidocaine, a box cutter and a really, really sharp pair of scissors, who knows?