Hello there!
I hope you had a nice evening, I did. One of the Saab cherry red convertible dudes called and invited me to the Braves game. I had nothing else to do and I always enjoy a good ballgame so I went. They won...but to tell you the truth, I couldn’t tell you the score of the game, LOL. I guess that’s because I was enjoying the play itself, not who was winning the game.
As usual, I also enjoyed a few jabs at the people in the crowd who, for one reason or another, evoked petty comments. There was one lady who stood at the top of the section we were in and checked tickets as people walked down the stairs to get to the better seats. She actually wore high heels. I couldn’t believe that a woman would report to her job on the stairway of a major league baseball game in pumps. That would be a pretty cool job, dontcha think? Except for those huge Amway parties, it wouldn’t be so bad to work at these venues. The guys who had those jobs did quite well. With the ladies, that is.
In Chicago we called them Andy Frain ushers, Andy was the guy who hired them all out. A job as an Andy Frain usher was a coveted position indeed for a young man in the Chicago suburbs.
Anyway, I have a feeling that the guy I went out with tonight is married. Don’t ask me why...it’s just a gut feeling. If I am right, he would just lie anyway and if I am wrong, I’d be guilty of a shameful disregard for the poor man’s character. So, for the time being, I will just sort of pay attention. If I am right, surely he will hang himself on any rope that I might give him. Besides, after 2 little dates, I shouldn’t be so judgmental anyway. Whatever.
OH!!! I went out with this other guy last week (The other Saab red convertible dude.). He is a guy who has been asking me out for about 2 months and I couldn’t come up with any more BS and I felt badly saying no constantly so this afternoon I just said yes. He is a very nice guy, he has a PhD in something that begins with Financial and writes papers on socio-economics issues. (See why I didn’t want to go out with him?) My point is...this is not a stupid man.
We had a really nice dinner at a middle eastern restaurant and the conversation was surprisingly pleasant and easy. We spoke about everything under the sun, from political issues to moral dilemma and back again. I told him about the other countries that I have been to and he told me about the other countries that he has lived in. We have both been out of our marriages for about the same amount of time and we shared some of our mutual experiences in the dating world. He told me about the women who ask him for money before they have sex and I told him about the men that I have gone out and their propensity to be a little bit potent with their icky selves...leaving me in the disagreeable position of either being rude or calling the cops. Anyway, we laughed and then we stayed far too long. I don’t know why the waitress didn’t tell us that the place was closed, I would have happily left earlier.
As we walked out to our cars, I was heading for mine when he sort of followed me and asked if I wanted to go someplace else for a drink. I reminded him about my court date in the morning and I told him that I would have to take a rain check. He tried to advance his “game”... I pleasantly stood my ground.
After he realized that I was not going to give on this position, he switched tactics. He asked me if I would just sit on one of the park benches. The place where we met was on the Marietta Square, the center of Cobb County business and justice, judging by all of the legal crap like courthouses, attorney’s offices and nice little bistro’s for entertaining business type people. In the middle of all of that is a park, a very nice park. I have been to many political rallies, historical drama, art shows and the like at this park. It’s only a mile from me on the way into town so it‘s very convenient for that first “meeting”.
I decided that I would sit and chat for a few minutes but, “Please, I DID tell you that I had to get up early for court in the morning and I apologize, but I simply MUST go home early this evening!”
Ok...so we’re sitting there, on the bench, chatting. Naturally, he got around to kissing me. And a worse kisser, I cannot imagine. It was as though this guy was 12 and I was his first kissing experience. Wouldn’t you think that after nearly a half century of kissing, SOMEBODY would have told this guy that his kisses are not only extremely unpleasant, but they are actually rather painful? AND...He had rigor lip-is. So, I’m sitting there, praying to God in heaven to PLEASE put a stop to this ickiness and then he starts getting into it. Now he’s kissing me with those horrid hard lips and he’s beginning to suck on a lip or two of my own almost immediately. The torture itself distorted time so I can’t be too sure of how long that horrid crap lasted, probably no longer than 45 seconds, but it seemed like ions. These are the things that I despise Rick for, I have no one to protect me from such heathens.
So, I start to push him away and he sort of touched my neck/upper chest and I decide that I have to go NOW. He grabbed my arm and GENTLY, but of this I am certain, took my hand and began to guide it towards IT. I started walking quickly back to my car and he followed me saying, “No! You misunderstood! You misunderstood!?” I didn’t need to do anything other than run at that point so I don’t have a clue what I “misunderstood”. At first, I didn’t want to mention it because I felt so foolish, but what the heck, I have nothing else to hide at this point. And, it’s one of those things that somebody might learn from so I decided to write about it anyway. Although I don’t know what I could have done differently, it's certainly a good thing that he doesn’t know where I live. (As far as I know, anyway.) These are the guys that make us hide our addresses from most men until they have proven themselves not to be a serial rapist.
I am stunned at how many men actually think that a woman would screw them on the first date. I discussed it with my daughter earlier this evening and I asked her if younger women were actually out there sleeping with anybody who might ask them. She answered in the affirmative and I said, “You mean the sluts, right?”
She responded, “Mom, it’s not just for sluts anymore.” OK, I guess I appreciate that. What I don’t get is how many men will actually behave in some atrocious manner like the nimrod from last week...AFTER I tell them about how I hate playing defense and if given an opportunity, I will go on and play offense myself. I told him how I specifically hated mashers and he went right ahead and thought to himself, “She couldn’t possibly mean ME! I shall have at the wench and I shall do so in a timely manner!” and then he mashed me!
Anyway, I figure that it must work for these guys at some point or they wouldn’t be so full of gusto when they do finally catch up to them once they reach the radio hit the snooze button...and I will need some help to get the stuff out of the car. The only guy that I enjoy kissing right now is tall dude with lots of curly hair. I don’t know why, maybe because he is just so damned good at it.
I got a strange email from an even stranger person who took issue with the way that I chose to save my cat’s life. (After losing a cat to the clothes dryer, I put my new kitten in the dryer and tossed him around a few times. Not enough to hurt him, just enough to be unpleasant so that I didn’t have to scrape another cat from the dryer drum.). This person said that they were going to report me to association for the prevention of cruelty to animals. Whatever. But to the whack job: My other cat would be alive today if I had done that to her. I love my animals enough to teach them to save their own lives. It’s similar to the mentality that I had when deciding when to smack the kids. I only hit them when what they were doing was to incredibly STUPID that someone could have lost life or limb over the behavior at hand before I had the time to TEACH them not to kill themselves. (Also, I smacked them for blatant disrespect, like F@#K YOU!” This was quite rare and don’t bother reporting me to the cops because the baby is a quarter century old and I am sure that the statute of limitations has long ago run out on any crimes I may or may not have committed. )
I don’t believe that my behavior was at all out of line and I would repeat said behavior until a “specialist” told me what I was doing wrong, why it was wrong and what I should be doing differently.
As a matter of fact, I think that should be a rule. You can’t bitch at me for what I do unless you offer me a better solution. OK?! OK!!! So my hair is now a bit shorter than it was yesterday...I shall be back!!!!!
So, I am getting tired and I haven’t been sleeping well lately so I am going to take a pain pill and see if I can fall asleep... and maybe even stay asleep!
OK, I must go to bed now. See ya!
Meg
Send comments to: Meg.Kelso@gmail.com
I hope you had a nice evening, I did. One of the Saab cherry red convertible dudes called and invited me to the Braves game. I had nothing else to do and I always enjoy a good ballgame so I went. They won...but to tell you the truth, I couldn’t tell you the score of the game, LOL. I guess that’s because I was enjoying the play itself, not who was winning the game.
As usual, I also enjoyed a few jabs at the people in the crowd who, for one reason or another, evoked petty comments. There was one lady who stood at the top of the section we were in and checked tickets as people walked down the stairs to get to the better seats. She actually wore high heels. I couldn’t believe that a woman would report to her job on the stairway of a major league baseball game in pumps. That would be a pretty cool job, dontcha think? Except for those huge Amway parties, it wouldn’t be so bad to work at these venues. The guys who had those jobs did quite well. With the ladies, that is.
In Chicago we called them Andy Frain ushers, Andy was the guy who hired them all out. A job as an Andy Frain usher was a coveted position indeed for a young man in the Chicago suburbs.
Anyway, I have a feeling that the guy I went out with tonight is married. Don’t ask me why...it’s just a gut feeling. If I am right, he would just lie anyway and if I am wrong, I’d be guilty of a shameful disregard for the poor man’s character. So, for the time being, I will just sort of pay attention. If I am right, surely he will hang himself on any rope that I might give him. Besides, after 2 little dates, I shouldn’t be so judgmental anyway. Whatever.
OH!!! I went out with this other guy last week (The other Saab red convertible dude.). He is a guy who has been asking me out for about 2 months and I couldn’t come up with any more BS and I felt badly saying no constantly so this afternoon I just said yes. He is a very nice guy, he has a PhD in something that begins with Financial and writes papers on socio-economics issues. (See why I didn’t want to go out with him?) My point is...this is not a stupid man.
We had a really nice dinner at a middle eastern restaurant and the conversation was surprisingly pleasant and easy. We spoke about everything under the sun, from political issues to moral dilemma and back again. I told him about the other countries that I have been to and he told me about the other countries that he has lived in. We have both been out of our marriages for about the same amount of time and we shared some of our mutual experiences in the dating world. He told me about the women who ask him for money before they have sex and I told him about the men that I have gone out and their propensity to be a little bit potent with their icky selves...leaving me in the disagreeable position of either being rude or calling the cops. Anyway, we laughed and then we stayed far too long. I don’t know why the waitress didn’t tell us that the place was closed, I would have happily left earlier.
As we walked out to our cars, I was heading for mine when he sort of followed me and asked if I wanted to go someplace else for a drink. I reminded him about my court date in the morning and I told him that I would have to take a rain check. He tried to advance his “game”... I pleasantly stood my ground.
After he realized that I was not going to give on this position, he switched tactics. He asked me if I would just sit on one of the park benches. The place where we met was on the Marietta Square, the center of Cobb County business and justice, judging by all of the legal crap like courthouses, attorney’s offices and nice little bistro’s for entertaining business type people. In the middle of all of that is a park, a very nice park. I have been to many political rallies, historical drama, art shows and the like at this park. It’s only a mile from me on the way into town so it‘s very convenient for that first “meeting”.
I decided that I would sit and chat for a few minutes but, “Please, I DID tell you that I had to get up early for court in the morning and I apologize, but I simply MUST go home early this evening!”
Ok...so we’re sitting there, on the bench, chatting. Naturally, he got around to kissing me. And a worse kisser, I cannot imagine. It was as though this guy was 12 and I was his first kissing experience. Wouldn’t you think that after nearly a half century of kissing, SOMEBODY would have told this guy that his kisses are not only extremely unpleasant, but they are actually rather painful? AND...He had rigor lip-is. So, I’m sitting there, praying to God in heaven to PLEASE put a stop to this ickiness and then he starts getting into it. Now he’s kissing me with those horrid hard lips and he’s beginning to suck on a lip or two of my own almost immediately. The torture itself distorted time so I can’t be too sure of how long that horrid crap lasted, probably no longer than 45 seconds, but it seemed like ions. These are the things that I despise Rick for, I have no one to protect me from such heathens.
So, I start to push him away and he sort of touched my neck/upper chest and I decide that I have to go NOW. He grabbed my arm and GENTLY, but of this I am certain, took my hand and began to guide it towards IT. I started walking quickly back to my car and he followed me saying, “No! You misunderstood! You misunderstood!?” I didn’t need to do anything other than run at that point so I don’t have a clue what I “misunderstood”. At first, I didn’t want to mention it because I felt so foolish, but what the heck, I have nothing else to hide at this point. And, it’s one of those things that somebody might learn from so I decided to write about it anyway. Although I don’t know what I could have done differently, it's certainly a good thing that he doesn’t know where I live. (As far as I know, anyway.) These are the guys that make us hide our addresses from most men until they have proven themselves not to be a serial rapist.
I am stunned at how many men actually think that a woman would screw them on the first date. I discussed it with my daughter earlier this evening and I asked her if younger women were actually out there sleeping with anybody who might ask them. She answered in the affirmative and I said, “You mean the sluts, right?”
She responded, “Mom, it’s not just for sluts anymore.” OK, I guess I appreciate that. What I don’t get is how many men will actually behave in some atrocious manner like the nimrod from last week...AFTER I tell them about how I hate playing defense and if given an opportunity, I will go on and play offense myself. I told him how I specifically hated mashers and he went right ahead and thought to himself, “She couldn’t possibly mean ME! I shall have at the wench and I shall do so in a timely manner!” and then he mashed me!
Anyway, I figure that it must work for these guys at some point or they wouldn’t be so full of gusto when they do finally catch up to them once they reach the radio hit the snooze button...and I will need some help to get the stuff out of the car. The only guy that I enjoy kissing right now is tall dude with lots of curly hair. I don’t know why, maybe because he is just so damned good at it.
I got a strange email from an even stranger person who took issue with the way that I chose to save my cat’s life. (After losing a cat to the clothes dryer, I put my new kitten in the dryer and tossed him around a few times. Not enough to hurt him, just enough to be unpleasant so that I didn’t have to scrape another cat from the dryer drum.). This person said that they were going to report me to association for the prevention of cruelty to animals. Whatever. But to the whack job: My other cat would be alive today if I had done that to her. I love my animals enough to teach them to save their own lives. It’s similar to the mentality that I had when deciding when to smack the kids. I only hit them when what they were doing was to incredibly STUPID that someone could have lost life or limb over the behavior at hand before I had the time to TEACH them not to kill themselves. (Also, I smacked them for blatant disrespect, like F@#K YOU!” This was quite rare and don’t bother reporting me to the cops because the baby is a quarter century old and I am sure that the statute of limitations has long ago run out on any crimes I may or may not have committed. )
I don’t believe that my behavior was at all out of line and I would repeat said behavior until a “specialist” told me what I was doing wrong, why it was wrong and what I should be doing differently.
As a matter of fact, I think that should be a rule. You can’t bitch at me for what I do unless you offer me a better solution. OK?! OK!!! So my hair is now a bit shorter than it was yesterday...I shall be back!!!!!
So, I am getting tired and I haven’t been sleeping well lately so I am going to take a pain pill and see if I can fall asleep... and maybe even stay asleep!
OK, I must go to bed now. See ya!
Meg
Send comments to: Meg.Kelso@gmail.com
posted by Meg Kelso | 10:55 PM
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