Well...
...I’m much better now. How angry can you be when there are little goblins knocking at your door saying “Trick or Treat?” Children are enough to evoke a smile from the most stringent scrooge out there.
Halloween is such a cool holiday. I do crazy things on that day. Yeah, I know, I do crazy stuff most days...but now I mean fun-crazy, not whacky crazy.
One year I wrapped myself up and sat on my porch like a fake mummy. The parents all assured their children that I was a “pretend monster and nothing to be afraid of”. When they put their little feet on the door step, I waved at them...scaring the parents and assuring that the children would never trust them again.
Another year, I disguised myself as a house plant on a table. How do you do that you ask? Well, first, you take a bunch of leaves. You put the first one on the top of your head and then the second one next to that and so on until your head is one big green bush. Then, you cut a hole in a box and an old table cloth. You sit on your front porch and stick your bush head through the hole and pull the covered box down and sit indian style. Now, you are a house plant on a table.
The great part about being a house plant is that no one expects you to be a fake house plant. The kids saw the mummy and approached with caution. But, they never imagine that a house plant might be scary. So, when the house plant looks up at them and says, “Hello”, they’re more than a little taken aback.
This year I didn’t do anything like that. I bought a bag of candy kisses and ate them. That was fun. Not as much fun as frightening small children, but it wasn’t bad.
Now I’m bored. I have nothing to do and no one to talk to. I hate that...don’t you? I guess I should have planned this Halloween a little better, but I’ve had other things on my mind. I’m in the mood to talk and I can’t think of a soul to call. I did speak to my sister, but she had a date with her husband. Apparently they were meeting in the bathtub. I should have asked her to just leave the phone on the hamper so I could feel more a part of things.
I drank a bunch of coffee so I wouldn’t fall asleep and now I’m all Darryl Strawberry wired and I don’t have anything to do. That was stupid. One should never drink a pot of coffee at 9 PM unless there’s a bunch of tinker toys or something like that to busy oneself with. At this point, I wish I had tinker toys. I would have something to do with my wide awake self.
Oh, my sister...who is, as I type this, getting lucky...wanted me to tell you that she wasn’t jealous of me and my divorce. There was something else that she added to that statement, but I forgot what it was. I could call her and ask her what it was, but something tells me she won’t remember right now either.
Whatever. I’m sure she’ll let me know if it was important. Well, I’ve run out of things to say and although that doesn’t usually stop me from saying stuff, I've been bored in the kitchen long enough. Now, I must go be bored in the living room.
See ya,
Meg
...I’m much better now. How angry can you be when there are little goblins knocking at your door saying “Trick or Treat?” Children are enough to evoke a smile from the most stringent scrooge out there.
Halloween is such a cool holiday. I do crazy things on that day. Yeah, I know, I do crazy stuff most days...but now I mean fun-crazy, not whacky crazy.
One year I wrapped myself up and sat on my porch like a fake mummy. The parents all assured their children that I was a “pretend monster and nothing to be afraid of”. When they put their little feet on the door step, I waved at them...scaring the parents and assuring that the children would never trust them again.
Another year, I disguised myself as a house plant on a table. How do you do that you ask? Well, first, you take a bunch of leaves. You put the first one on the top of your head and then the second one next to that and so on until your head is one big green bush. Then, you cut a hole in a box and an old table cloth. You sit on your front porch and stick your bush head through the hole and pull the covered box down and sit indian style. Now, you are a house plant on a table.
The great part about being a house plant is that no one expects you to be a fake house plant. The kids saw the mummy and approached with caution. But, they never imagine that a house plant might be scary. So, when the house plant looks up at them and says, “Hello”, they’re more than a little taken aback.
This year I didn’t do anything like that. I bought a bag of candy kisses and ate them. That was fun. Not as much fun as frightening small children, but it wasn’t bad.
Now I’m bored. I have nothing to do and no one to talk to. I hate that...don’t you? I guess I should have planned this Halloween a little better, but I’ve had other things on my mind. I’m in the mood to talk and I can’t think of a soul to call. I did speak to my sister, but she had a date with her husband. Apparently they were meeting in the bathtub. I should have asked her to just leave the phone on the hamper so I could feel more a part of things.
I drank a bunch of coffee so I wouldn’t fall asleep and now I’m all Darryl Strawberry wired and I don’t have anything to do. That was stupid. One should never drink a pot of coffee at 9 PM unless there’s a bunch of tinker toys or something like that to busy oneself with. At this point, I wish I had tinker toys. I would have something to do with my wide awake self.
Oh, my sister...who is, as I type this, getting lucky...wanted me to tell you that she wasn’t jealous of me and my divorce. There was something else that she added to that statement, but I forgot what it was. I could call her and ask her what it was, but something tells me she won’t remember right now either.
Whatever. I’m sure she’ll let me know if it was important. Well, I’ve run out of things to say and although that doesn’t usually stop me from saying stuff, I've been bored in the kitchen long enough. Now, I must go be bored in the living room.
See ya,
Meg
posted by Meg Kelso | 8:26 PM
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