When things are at their worse...
...and I start to feel down and sorry for myself, I think of my beautiful daughter. I never wanted a girl because I didn't want to deal with a kid who might be like me. But I was blessed with every parents dream, in spite of myself and what I thought that I wanted.
She's beautiful, smart, kind, sensitive and smarter than any two people that I know. She's the first female in my family to make it to 25 without having a few kids or getting into some sort of abusive marriage and she's smart enough to stay away from drugs and alcohol. She is on her way to a successful career and has her life planned out better than I ever could or did.
The day she was born, I was amazed that I had been given a girl..I didn't know what to make of her. She had a patch of red hair on the top of her head and she was as pink as she could be. Her dainty little fingers fascinated me and I stared at them for hours as she wrapped them around my fingers or held my breatsts as I nursed her. I remember holding her in my arms as she looked at me, eye to eye, as though she wanted to tell me something that was very important.
She's always been a happy little lady and she's always been the kind of person who knew right from wrong. Her sense of right and wrong never stopped her from having kindness in her heart for people who didn't always choose the right path. She has always been kind and understanding of people who may not have done the right thing...knowing inherently that at times, when people don't have the support that they need, they make mistakes but that doesn't mean that they aren't worthy of compassion.
When she was very little, I decided to give her something that I never had...encouragement and praise so that she would always know her worth. I told her often how pretty she was, how smart she was and how she could do anything in the world that she wanted to do...as long as she wanted it badly enough. I tell her that I love her everytime I talk to her and when she was little, I told her every single day.
Her precocious little self made me laugh so often. I couldn't believe the funny, wise things that would come out of her mouth. The day that she said, "This is a real Maalox moment, isn't it, Mom?" as I waited impatiently at the front door, afraid that my two dates might run into each other, lightened the moment and made me shake my head in wonder at the little 7 year old girl who had come up with such a witty and appropriate comment as her mothered neared panic over another crazy situation that I had gotten myself into.
When I moved my kids from Virginia to Illinois, Annie had just finished kindergarten. Someone in the Illinois school told me that the kindergarten kids there knew how to read. So, I hired a teacher from that school to tutor Annie over the summer so that she wouldn't be behind when she started first grade. Over that summer, Annie did learn to read. It turned out that the person who told me that was wrong, those first graders didn't know how to read. So, the first day that Annie came home from school, she took her reading book into her bedroom to do her homework which was to read pages 1-3. The next day I receieved a phone call from Annie's teacher. She was a bit upset because when she assigned the following day's homework, Annie announced that she had read the entire book and therefore, she was "done". The teacher tried to explain to me that Annie may have known how to READ the words, but she couldn't have learned to COMPREHEND them. Well, that teacher was wrong. Annie explained the entire book to me...she comprehended everything that she had read.
A few years later, Annie was a cheerleader and she and her squad won the City Cheerleading Competition, beating out the Williamson Road squad who had finished first for the previous 3 years. I sat in the stands and cried tears of pride as I watched my adorable daughter with her beautiful smile, cheering her little heart out.
When she had her first broken heart, I ached for her, knowing how badly it hurts when a young lady has that first, deep pain that can't be consoled by anyone. I wanted to take the pain away myself but I couldn't, I had to sit by and let her hurt...something that no parent bears easily. But I knew that Annie would find another love, many more in fact, because she is the type of young lady that any man would be proud to take home to meet his parents and escort about town, showing her off to all of his friends. Not just because of her outer beauty, but because of the warm and heartening glow that exudes from this charming woman.
Annie is a very sensitive little lady and she hurts very easily. When she is wronged, she is so very sad because she doesn't understand why anyone would be so cruel to her, or to anyone else for that matter. She's always been the type of child who would befriend the most unpopular of all the other kids. It would never occur to her to be mean to a soul, so when nastiness is tossed at her, she hurts deeply because she just doesn't comprehend how a person could be so cruel to another human being.
She is quick to laugh and everyone who knows her loves to be in her presence because she exudes a happiness that's very contagious. She's as loyal as a puppy and as loving as anyone could be. She would stand up for the rights of a stranger and would give you the shirt off of her back if you needed it. She loves children and has the patience of a Saint when she plays with her cousins, her neice or any other child that she comes into contact with. She'll make a wonderful mother and I can't wait to see her hold her own little baby in her arms.
Someday, she will be a mother and I wish for her what I was given, a child who makes a mother proud and happy straight through to her soul.
Right now, there are a few miserable people who are being quite nasty to Annie, and all because she helped her mother. I've tried to explain to her that some people are very pathetic and unhappy with their own lives and they can only find happiness in causing pain to others. I spoke to some of Annie's relatives in Chicago and they assured me that they would help Annie for me. I can't leave this state right now but if I could, I would walk, run, or crawl right to Illinois and put my arms around my little girl and wipe away her tears...but I can't. That's the cruelest cut of them all but I know my daughter and she'll get through this one way or another. I just hope that she has the same faith because if there's one thing that I've learned in life, it's that you get back what you put out and she has put out nothing but goodness. Those who are taking delight in hurting my daughter will get that same hurt back. I find no happiness in that, but I know it will happen just as surely as I know that my daughter is the most wonderful gift that I've ever been given and I thank God for her. She has truly been the one thing that has kept me from going insane in this crazy world. I only hope that everyone else has a person in their life like my Annie...gifts like her are rare and precious.
Annie...I love you more than you could ever know. You'll be fine, I promise.
Mom
...and I start to feel down and sorry for myself, I think of my beautiful daughter. I never wanted a girl because I didn't want to deal with a kid who might be like me. But I was blessed with every parents dream, in spite of myself and what I thought that I wanted.
She's beautiful, smart, kind, sensitive and smarter than any two people that I know. She's the first female in my family to make it to 25 without having a few kids or getting into some sort of abusive marriage and she's smart enough to stay away from drugs and alcohol. She is on her way to a successful career and has her life planned out better than I ever could or did.
The day she was born, I was amazed that I had been given a girl..I didn't know what to make of her. She had a patch of red hair on the top of her head and she was as pink as she could be. Her dainty little fingers fascinated me and I stared at them for hours as she wrapped them around my fingers or held my breatsts as I nursed her. I remember holding her in my arms as she looked at me, eye to eye, as though she wanted to tell me something that was very important.
She's always been a happy little lady and she's always been the kind of person who knew right from wrong. Her sense of right and wrong never stopped her from having kindness in her heart for people who didn't always choose the right path. She has always been kind and understanding of people who may not have done the right thing...knowing inherently that at times, when people don't have the support that they need, they make mistakes but that doesn't mean that they aren't worthy of compassion.
When she was very little, I decided to give her something that I never had...encouragement and praise so that she would always know her worth. I told her often how pretty she was, how smart she was and how she could do anything in the world that she wanted to do...as long as she wanted it badly enough. I tell her that I love her everytime I talk to her and when she was little, I told her every single day.
Her precocious little self made me laugh so often. I couldn't believe the funny, wise things that would come out of her mouth. The day that she said, "This is a real Maalox moment, isn't it, Mom?" as I waited impatiently at the front door, afraid that my two dates might run into each other, lightened the moment and made me shake my head in wonder at the little 7 year old girl who had come up with such a witty and appropriate comment as her mothered neared panic over another crazy situation that I had gotten myself into.
When I moved my kids from Virginia to Illinois, Annie had just finished kindergarten. Someone in the Illinois school told me that the kindergarten kids there knew how to read. So, I hired a teacher from that school to tutor Annie over the summer so that she wouldn't be behind when she started first grade. Over that summer, Annie did learn to read. It turned out that the person who told me that was wrong, those first graders didn't know how to read. So, the first day that Annie came home from school, she took her reading book into her bedroom to do her homework which was to read pages 1-3. The next day I receieved a phone call from Annie's teacher. She was a bit upset because when she assigned the following day's homework, Annie announced that she had read the entire book and therefore, she was "done". The teacher tried to explain to me that Annie may have known how to READ the words, but she couldn't have learned to COMPREHEND them. Well, that teacher was wrong. Annie explained the entire book to me...she comprehended everything that she had read.
A few years later, Annie was a cheerleader and she and her squad won the City Cheerleading Competition, beating out the Williamson Road squad who had finished first for the previous 3 years. I sat in the stands and cried tears of pride as I watched my adorable daughter with her beautiful smile, cheering her little heart out.
When she had her first broken heart, I ached for her, knowing how badly it hurts when a young lady has that first, deep pain that can't be consoled by anyone. I wanted to take the pain away myself but I couldn't, I had to sit by and let her hurt...something that no parent bears easily. But I knew that Annie would find another love, many more in fact, because she is the type of young lady that any man would be proud to take home to meet his parents and escort about town, showing her off to all of his friends. Not just because of her outer beauty, but because of the warm and heartening glow that exudes from this charming woman.
Annie is a very sensitive little lady and she hurts very easily. When she is wronged, she is so very sad because she doesn't understand why anyone would be so cruel to her, or to anyone else for that matter. She's always been the type of child who would befriend the most unpopular of all the other kids. It would never occur to her to be mean to a soul, so when nastiness is tossed at her, she hurts deeply because she just doesn't comprehend how a person could be so cruel to another human being.
She is quick to laugh and everyone who knows her loves to be in her presence because she exudes a happiness that's very contagious. She's as loyal as a puppy and as loving as anyone could be. She would stand up for the rights of a stranger and would give you the shirt off of her back if you needed it. She loves children and has the patience of a Saint when she plays with her cousins, her neice or any other child that she comes into contact with. She'll make a wonderful mother and I can't wait to see her hold her own little baby in her arms.
Someday, she will be a mother and I wish for her what I was given, a child who makes a mother proud and happy straight through to her soul.
Right now, there are a few miserable people who are being quite nasty to Annie, and all because she helped her mother. I've tried to explain to her that some people are very pathetic and unhappy with their own lives and they can only find happiness in causing pain to others. I spoke to some of Annie's relatives in Chicago and they assured me that they would help Annie for me. I can't leave this state right now but if I could, I would walk, run, or crawl right to Illinois and put my arms around my little girl and wipe away her tears...but I can't. That's the cruelest cut of them all but I know my daughter and she'll get through this one way or another. I just hope that she has the same faith because if there's one thing that I've learned in life, it's that you get back what you put out and she has put out nothing but goodness. Those who are taking delight in hurting my daughter will get that same hurt back. I find no happiness in that, but I know it will happen just as surely as I know that my daughter is the most wonderful gift that I've ever been given and I thank God for her. She has truly been the one thing that has kept me from going insane in this crazy world. I only hope that everyone else has a person in their life like my Annie...gifts like her are rare and precious.
Annie...I love you more than you could ever know. You'll be fine, I promise.
Mom
posted by Meg Kelso | 6:26 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home