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Hi. I'm trying to think of another description to put here. Any ideas? I'll try again at 420.

Monday, October 04, 2010

I enjoy drinking my...

...my first cup of coffee on the front porch. I usually wake up a good 2 hours before anyone else in the house wakes up so I have time to sit outside, enjoy the new day and sip my coffee in silence. But lately, the steps upon which I sit have been a bit wet from the morning dew, soon to be frost considering how north I currently find myself.

For the past few days, the temperature has plummeted to temperatures that only occur in Georgia during the dead of winter. That's not quite cold enough to freeze the dew so I've had to put a towel on the step to sit on. It worked out well over the weekend so it was with confidence and a dry butt that I sat down upon my folded beach towel, expecting my usual soft, dry sitting place.

As I sat down, I was amazed at how cold my towel was, and of course, my backside. I actually sat there long enough to make the cold step warm up a bit to less biting temperatures. I don't know what made me decide that it might be warmer if I moved the towel but eventually I did. That's when I noticed my mistake.

Did you know that towels collect dew as well? I didn't. The towel was quite wet and of course, so was my butt. And in Chicago during October, everything is cold so that stupid towel was cold and wet...and I had been sitting upon it for quite some time. What I had perceived as a warming affect caused by the radiation of my ass heat into the cold towel, was actually my ass becoming numb from the cold, wet, Chicago towel. I had quite simply lost all ability to perceive any thermal feeling on my butt...and I also lost the ability to feel pressure, pain or pleasure in the area between my tail bone and pubic bone.

That information did me no good, but I thought it might help a man stuck in Sing Sing. So, if you are currently in that place where men are scared and soap is grasped tightly in the shower, consider sitting on a wet towel in the winter. It works wonders.


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