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Hi. I'm trying to think of another description to put here. Any ideas? I'll try again at 420.

Tuesday, June 04, 2013

It's not me, it's you

OK, this is the second time I'm writing this stupid post. I can never recapture the charm of the first draft. Let's see if I can do it again.

So, this morning I met another asshole. I walked away thinking that there must be a one asshole minimum per day. Then it occurred to me that I'm being tested. If I can handle all of this, then I am truly worthy of a second chance at life. I know I am, so this will be interesting. I'm looking at it as a sociological survey, educational, you know? How many of you can say that you escaped an abusive situation, lived in a flop house and suffered major depression. This should be a valuable life experience...I just need to figure out how to squeeze the value out of it.

I have a doctor appointment today at 2:30 and it is now 7:30 so I actually have to start getting ready soon. I have no clue how I'll be getting there so I have to shower, dress in some relatively decent clothes, fix my hair,  put on make-up and then figure out the bus schedule or start walking. Actually, I'd prefer to walk but Tampa is killer hot and humid. It only gets to about 90 every day but it's a wet heat.

I  used to say, horses sweat, men perspire and ladies glisten. Well, this place makes me sweat like a horse. I've actually had sweat make my clothes wet, that has never happened to me before. I'm getting hooked on showers. I've taken more in one day than I usually take in 3. The stupid thing is, I'm no cleaner than I would be at one shower a day. Well, I'm not really dirty but the sweat makes me feel all sticky and icky. Anyway, chances are I'll be taking the bus.

Well, I should run, writing this twice had actually taken a long time because the connection is so sucky. Someone told me that an antenna would help. I have no clue what that costs. You know how I said that it's 7:30? Some dude is sitting in front of me doing that, "I only have four dollars to last the whole day." Then he added, "I always pay my debts in case I want to borrow more money." That's not exactly sweetening the pot. Before he started the money thing, he came out asking other guys what time the liquor store opened? I said, "Who drinks so early in the morning? Everyone else sitting here jumped in and said, Me! I'm waiting too!"



Blogger Tundra Woman said...

Ms. Meg? I've been where you are. I left with 2 20 gal. black garbage bags with what ever I could grab quickly. My neighbor arranged for a ride for me to the closest city about 30 mi. away. I had just gotten out of a hospital there-I'm sure you can figure out how I ended up there and yes, it involved a guy. I got dropped off on a street corner with my bags, a "Bag Lady" literally before there was such a term.

And started my life all over again.

By all means, consider your current situation a Sociological Study...in why telling people to "...just pull yourself up by your bootstraps" fails to address the very real challenges of every single minute of every single day. Where you're dealing with heat, I was dealing with indescribable cold. In my "beat feet and retreat," guess what I forgot to grab?!

You are MORE than "worthy of a second chance at life." You have always deserved the same as any other "human bean:" The right to be treated with dignity and respect.
Please keep making your appointments. I promise this is NOT the rest of your life: It's just an "Intermission."
Take care of YOU, Ms. Meggers.

June 04, 2013  

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