My dad irritated me this morning...

...so I said, "I hope your next shit is a porcupine." He responded, "And you're supposed to be the smart one?" Then he went on to illustrate how each of my siblings lack the senses of humor that goes along with being bright. (If you doubt me, just ask a Jew, I've never met one that wasn't witty and clever...and certainly not stupid.)

With that one comment, my father unwittingly let on that he believes something that I have always known...I AM the brightest one of the 6 children produced by my mother and (according to my mother) my father.

I have brothers who aren't smart enough to realize the benefits of a cohesive family. But, I haven't seen them in quite some time so I wasn't too sure that I was smarter than they but, as I said, my father, who would know...just said so. Nyuk Nyuk.

Of course I knew I was brighter than either of my 2 sisters who once got together on a birthday gift for me that was a charm with the word BITCH written in gold three times. So, I don't mind the risk that I might hurt their feelings by saying that I am smarter than they are. Besides, I'm pretty sure they already know.

Now...how to break it to my father that I am also much brighter than he?