I can be far too friendly...
...and I've got to learn to stop doing that. There are two people who are still calling me from jail and I haven't accepted any of those calls. I don't know how much longer either one will be calling me, but if they don't stop soon, I'm going to have to get my number changed.
One of them is in jail for some crime related to being a con-artist. She's the woman who wanted me to get her out of jail in exchange for cash. She just needs someone stable enough to sign the bond and although I may be just that, I'm not stupid enough to sign to get a con-artist out of jail.
The one really decent person that I met while I was there, Melissa, told me that this woman, let's call her Fiona, owed money to everyone that Melissa referred her to. She owed money to the bail-bondsman and the attorney. Yet, she still calls the attorney's office at least six times a day. The attorney's office isn't dumb enough to accept her calls and...this one time...neither am I.
Fiona said that if I signed to get her out of jail, she would give me two grand...within seven days. I'm actually insulted that she thinks I'm that stupid. I'm absolutely convinced that if I did sign for her to get out, she would bolt at her earliest opportunity. That chick has no intention of showing up at her next probation meeting, much less her court date.
I don't know what happens to people who sign for a crook that takes off, but it can't be good. Fiona actually tried to let me in on some of her scams and after she did, basically admitting to me that she was a con-artist, she thought that I would fall for one of her scams. As I said, that's downright insulting.
The other person calling me said that he would pay my phone bill if I accepted his calls. Apparently he is about to inherit a bunch of cash.
That's actually true. I spoke to his sister and she verified it. Even if I would accept a bunch of cash from the guy, my phone would be turned off before he got his inheritance.Somebody told me not to speak to a SOUL while I was locked up and I should have listened. But, being the outgoing, friendly person that I am, I just couldn't help myself. I spoke to anyone and everyone. One day when I actually felt pretty good, I walked around chatting with people and asking them what they were in for. One chick didn't want to answer me and the way she looked at me, I thought that she might just twist my head off of my shoulders. I just sort of changed the subject and kept on speaking to her and eventually, I won her over. She did tell me what she was there for, she even described her crime to me. I already knew what she was there for, my "bunkmate" had already told me. At some point in our conversation, I let on that I already knew why she was there. She wanted to know who told me and I responded, "I don't remember who it was and if I did, I wouldn't tell you anyway." At that point, I really didn't remember who told me. We were near my bunk and my bunkmate said, "I told her."
I don't know why she blew her own cover, I wouldn't have if I had remembered. I guess she wasn't intimidated by the broad...I sure was. I didn't let on, like Richard Pryor and Gene Wilder in Stir Crazy, I sort of acted all cool. I don't know that I pulled it off any better than those two did, but I tried my best. I didn't get the broom treatment in the shower so I guess I did alright.
As large as that pod was, a person could get murdered before the guards even noticed that there was a problem. They don't have any weapons in there, but some of those women looked like they didn't need one.Well, my phone just rang and it isn't a collect call so I think I'll answer it.See you later!
Meg
...and I've got to learn to stop doing that. There are two people who are still calling me from jail and I haven't accepted any of those calls. I don't know how much longer either one will be calling me, but if they don't stop soon, I'm going to have to get my number changed.
One of them is in jail for some crime related to being a con-artist. She's the woman who wanted me to get her out of jail in exchange for cash. She just needs someone stable enough to sign the bond and although I may be just that, I'm not stupid enough to sign to get a con-artist out of jail.
The one really decent person that I met while I was there, Melissa, told me that this woman, let's call her Fiona, owed money to everyone that Melissa referred her to. She owed money to the bail-bondsman and the attorney. Yet, she still calls the attorney's office at least six times a day. The attorney's office isn't dumb enough to accept her calls and...this one time...neither am I.
Fiona said that if I signed to get her out of jail, she would give me two grand...within seven days. I'm actually insulted that she thinks I'm that stupid. I'm absolutely convinced that if I did sign for her to get out, she would bolt at her earliest opportunity. That chick has no intention of showing up at her next probation meeting, much less her court date.
I don't know what happens to people who sign for a crook that takes off, but it can't be good. Fiona actually tried to let me in on some of her scams and after she did, basically admitting to me that she was a con-artist, she thought that I would fall for one of her scams. As I said, that's downright insulting.
The other person calling me said that he would pay my phone bill if I accepted his calls. Apparently he is about to inherit a bunch of cash.
That's actually true. I spoke to his sister and she verified it. Even if I would accept a bunch of cash from the guy, my phone would be turned off before he got his inheritance.Somebody told me not to speak to a SOUL while I was locked up and I should have listened. But, being the outgoing, friendly person that I am, I just couldn't help myself. I spoke to anyone and everyone. One day when I actually felt pretty good, I walked around chatting with people and asking them what they were in for. One chick didn't want to answer me and the way she looked at me, I thought that she might just twist my head off of my shoulders. I just sort of changed the subject and kept on speaking to her and eventually, I won her over. She did tell me what she was there for, she even described her crime to me. I already knew what she was there for, my "bunkmate" had already told me. At some point in our conversation, I let on that I already knew why she was there. She wanted to know who told me and I responded, "I don't remember who it was and if I did, I wouldn't tell you anyway." At that point, I really didn't remember who told me. We were near my bunk and my bunkmate said, "I told her."
I don't know why she blew her own cover, I wouldn't have if I had remembered. I guess she wasn't intimidated by the broad...I sure was. I didn't let on, like Richard Pryor and Gene Wilder in Stir Crazy, I sort of acted all cool. I don't know that I pulled it off any better than those two did, but I tried my best. I didn't get the broom treatment in the shower so I guess I did alright.
As large as that pod was, a person could get murdered before the guards even noticed that there was a problem. They don't have any weapons in there, but some of those women looked like they didn't need one.Well, my phone just rang and it isn't a collect call so I think I'll answer it.See you later!
Meg
posted by Meg Kelso | 1:01 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home