When I was a kid...
...my mother's flatware service had plenty of spoons...but it only had one sugar spoon. It was as long as the other spoons, but the bowl on the sugar spoon was round instead of the more oval shape bowls of the regular spoons. Both types of spoons would get the job done, none of us ever starved for lack of the sugar spoon, but every single meal in our house was preceded by 6 kids arguing over who called the sugar spoon first. None of us cared if we had the sugar spoon or not, we just didn't want anyone else to get it.
That's the part about being a jerk that feels good, isn't it? You get to step on the people around you. Some things are just so useless to bicker about that I don't usually get involved in the discussions in the first place. But recently I listened intently to a "debate" regarding same sex marriage. It was like listening to a brood of brats bickering over who called the "sugar spoon" first.
I don't know if they still do it or not, but back in the olden days they taught high school kids how to debate. There were rules to follow. I may not remember all of them but I'm sure there was no name calling.
All the pro- same sex marriage people did was imply that those who disagreed with them were racist, sexist, homophobic and all sorts of other bad things for a person to be. At one time gays simply wanted to be accepted. Most Americans pretty much didn't care so they accepted the gay population. But then the gay peeps upped their request. No longer is it good enough to "accept" them, we must now ENDORSE their lifestyle. Reasonable people are no longer allowed to disagree and that's too bad. Name calling is not a debating point, it's just plain incendiary.
And then the traditional marriage people opened their mouths and started using words like "church" and "sin". Nothing ends a political argument faster than instilling religion into it. One nit-wit asserted that the Founding Fathers were Christians....blah, blah, blah. I guess they were but they did go out of their way to separate the two entities.
Once God was injected into the "debate", a few obviously odd people lost all credibility. If they admit that religion is behind their thinking, can an admission of homophobia be far behind? That just makes people with rational comments look like idiots before they even open their mouths.
I sincerely wanted to hear an intelligent debate about the issue of same sex marriage and I still haven't heard one. Not one of those yahoos made an actual point to support their own side of the issue. It's not like they couldn't have...they had time to prepare themselves with horror stories and hideous violations of civil liberties. But that's all they have. That...and disdain for their adversary.
You could see the hatred in the eyes of these seemingly decent Americans when they discussed that one topic. If they had all met at a birthday party, they would be having a wonderful time. But, since they both come to the table with their own experiences, they are far too hostile to even shake hands at the beginning of the "debate".
In case you should want to debate a point sometime, consider these suggestions:
1. Don't disagree with obvious truths.
2. Attack the idea not the person.
3. Avoid exaggeration.
4. If it is just an opinion, admit it.
5. Do not present opinion as facts.
6. Smile when disagreeing.
7. Stress the positive.
8. You do not need to win every battle to win the war.
9. Concede minor or trivial points.
10. Avoid bickering, quarreling, and wrangling.
11. Watch your tone of voice.
12. Don't win a debate and lose a friend.
13. Keep your perspective - You're just debating!
(http://www.paulnoll.com/Books/Clear-English/debate-advice.html)
Think about it this way...if your kid was in high school, would you want him or her to learn how to debate in such a hostile manner? It IS the sign of a mind incapable of critical thinking.
Oh, and why isn't logic on the curriculum for a degree in Woman's Studies at ANY college?
...my mother's flatware service had plenty of spoons...but it only had one sugar spoon. It was as long as the other spoons, but the bowl on the sugar spoon was round instead of the more oval shape bowls of the regular spoons. Both types of spoons would get the job done, none of us ever starved for lack of the sugar spoon, but every single meal in our house was preceded by 6 kids arguing over who called the sugar spoon first. None of us cared if we had the sugar spoon or not, we just didn't want anyone else to get it.
That's the part about being a jerk that feels good, isn't it? You get to step on the people around you. Some things are just so useless to bicker about that I don't usually get involved in the discussions in the first place. But recently I listened intently to a "debate" regarding same sex marriage. It was like listening to a brood of brats bickering over who called the "sugar spoon" first.
I don't know if they still do it or not, but back in the olden days they taught high school kids how to debate. There were rules to follow. I may not remember all of them but I'm sure there was no name calling.
All the pro- same sex marriage people did was imply that those who disagreed with them were racist, sexist, homophobic and all sorts of other bad things for a person to be. At one time gays simply wanted to be accepted. Most Americans pretty much didn't care so they accepted the gay population. But then the gay peeps upped their request. No longer is it good enough to "accept" them, we must now ENDORSE their lifestyle. Reasonable people are no longer allowed to disagree and that's too bad. Name calling is not a debating point, it's just plain incendiary.
And then the traditional marriage people opened their mouths and started using words like "church" and "sin". Nothing ends a political argument faster than instilling religion into it. One nit-wit asserted that the Founding Fathers were Christians....blah, blah, blah. I guess they were but they did go out of their way to separate the two entities.
Once God was injected into the "debate", a few obviously odd people lost all credibility. If they admit that religion is behind their thinking, can an admission of homophobia be far behind? That just makes people with rational comments look like idiots before they even open their mouths.
I sincerely wanted to hear an intelligent debate about the issue of same sex marriage and I still haven't heard one. Not one of those yahoos made an actual point to support their own side of the issue. It's not like they couldn't have...they had time to prepare themselves with horror stories and hideous violations of civil liberties. But that's all they have. That...and disdain for their adversary.
You could see the hatred in the eyes of these seemingly decent Americans when they discussed that one topic. If they had all met at a birthday party, they would be having a wonderful time. But, since they both come to the table with their own experiences, they are far too hostile to even shake hands at the beginning of the "debate".
In case you should want to debate a point sometime, consider these suggestions:
1. Don't disagree with obvious truths.
2. Attack the idea not the person.
3. Avoid exaggeration.
4. If it is just an opinion, admit it.
5. Do not present opinion as facts.
6. Smile when disagreeing.
7. Stress the positive.
8. You do not need to win every battle to win the war.
9. Concede minor or trivial points.
10. Avoid bickering, quarreling, and wrangling.
11. Watch your tone of voice.
12. Don't win a debate and lose a friend.
13. Keep your perspective - You're just debating!
(http://www.paulnoll.com/Books/Clear-English/debate-advice.html)
Think about it this way...if your kid was in high school, would you want him or her to learn how to debate in such a hostile manner? It IS the sign of a mind incapable of critical thinking.
Oh, and why isn't logic on the curriculum for a degree in Woman's Studies at ANY college?
posted by Meg Kelso | 3:36 AM
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