Good morning...
This morning I am just kind of watching the kids...that is my granddaughter and her brother. I have adopted the little guy as my own. His father took off before he was born. I often wonder what men think about when they do that. Do they think about the kid at all? Is there anyone out there who walked away from a child and has never gone back? Can you, under the cloak of anonymity, explain the thought process behind doing something like that? I have always wondered. My son would cry out loud in his room when he couldn't see his daughter. He spent a lot of money on attorneys and did whatever it took to see his child. I am so proud of him for that.
If you did walk away from a child, can you tell me, did your father walk away as well? I wonder if a man is more likely to do this if he never really had a father himself. As the daughter of a very good father, I couldn't imagine growing up without a father or keeping my children from theirs. I think a kid needs all the people who love him/her in their life that they can possibly have. I get very angry at friends of mine who, for no good reason, kick the father out of the kids' life for no reason other than spite. Melissa, a very good friend of mine, was extremely cruel to her kids and their father. I couldn't believe she did it. SHE was the one who cheated yet she took him to the cleaners. I would like to hear from fathers who did walk away and from fathers who were pushed away. No judging, just curiosity. And the hope that someone might learn from your story.
Meg
This morning I am just kind of watching the kids...that is my granddaughter and her brother. I have adopted the little guy as my own. His father took off before he was born. I often wonder what men think about when they do that. Do they think about the kid at all? Is there anyone out there who walked away from a child and has never gone back? Can you, under the cloak of anonymity, explain the thought process behind doing something like that? I have always wondered. My son would cry out loud in his room when he couldn't see his daughter. He spent a lot of money on attorneys and did whatever it took to see his child. I am so proud of him for that.
If you did walk away from a child, can you tell me, did your father walk away as well? I wonder if a man is more likely to do this if he never really had a father himself. As the daughter of a very good father, I couldn't imagine growing up without a father or keeping my children from theirs. I think a kid needs all the people who love him/her in their life that they can possibly have. I get very angry at friends of mine who, for no good reason, kick the father out of the kids' life for no reason other than spite. Melissa, a very good friend of mine, was extremely cruel to her kids and their father. I couldn't believe she did it. SHE was the one who cheated yet she took him to the cleaners. I would like to hear from fathers who did walk away and from fathers who were pushed away. No judging, just curiosity. And the hope that someone might learn from your story.
Meg
posted by Meg Kelso | 7:32 AM
6 Comments:
My daughter will be four years old this year. Her father walked out on us right after she was born. He spent a little time with her, but as the years passed, he stopped. He always told me "Please dont ever keep her from me." and I havent. I always told him he could see her anytime he wished, but do you think he does?? (No) We have joint custody, and I dont really know why anymore. I recently found out that he is expecting another baby, a boy, and is planning on marrying his new girl.(She is very young.)We seen them both in the gorcery store and I stopped so that she could say hello to her dad. She kept saying "I love you daddy." and he gave her a hug and walked away. I kept wondering "How could he not want to see her." I mean, if I had a child and she/he kept telling me how much she/he loved me, I would not be able to just walk away. But he did it. It didnt seem to bother my daughter at the time, maybe she isn't quite aware of what is going on, I dont know. But it bothered me, because I know he will probably always be like that, and some day it will hurt her.
Now, this is exactly what I mean. I hope that there is a man out there who is strong enough to answer this question for me and this lady as well. What do you tell your daughter when something like this happens? I know people will justify everything they do but is there not any guilt involved when you do justify it to yourself?
Meg
Meg,
Did you really think that men would admit to anything? They are'nt that nice.
Well, I guess that is a good point but I try not to assume much(that if they did it in the first place they wouldn't be strong enough to answer now) It is possible that a man who left a child behind years ago would feel comfortable sharing that now. But, I still stand by what I said yesterday, most of the men that read this are decent men so perhaps the kind who would leave a kid wouldn't be here in the first place. As the mother of 2 sons and the sister of 3 brothers, I don't just assume that they are all bums although I certainly have more than enough reason to assume it. I MUST believe that there are decent guys out there. I absolutely MUST. Otherwise, I should getteth my ass to a nunnery now.
Meg
hey meg, just wanted to chime in here.
My sperm donor (these guys do not deserve to be called "father") ran out on my mom after getting her preggo and was never to be seen again. This was back in the late 60s when pregnancy was still a womans fault and there wasn't much in the way of support enforcement.
I wrenched my guys over this SOB for years wondering why he wanted nothing to do with me, and finally came to the conclusion to live a happy life I had to quit thinking of him as "the dad that rejected me" and think of him instead as the sperm donor.
And yeah, I'll bet the bastard is some couch potato football dud jacking off to scrambled porn on tv just like Rick.
You are very lucky to have gotten rid of this guy! I still think you need a nice geek guy instead. :-)
Fanny
Hi Fanny,
Hey, I NEVER turned geeks down as an entire group. I just haven't had my pick of them...never run across them in my browsing. I have a problem. My catfish algea eater thing had gotten so big...I think I could keep it if I caught it. PetSmart closed down all the small pet stores that would trade with me. Does anyone want a clean, disease free catfish? I bet I would need a geek to fix this one...'ey? Glad to see you!
Meg
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