Meg...
"...The meretricious cohabitation (sounds like it must be illegal, immoral or fattening : i.e. sounds like fun...) -- that's got to go. It's purely symbolic, it's not worth a dime to either of you, but it's degrading.The tax thing. Did that come up during the mediation? You didn't sign that stuff off on the spot, did you? so your lawyer should have spotted it, surely, and ensured you understood the consequences. Was it a bargaining chip for something specific, or just part of the package?"
Yes, it came up in mediation. If I file alone, I get a refund that would be enough for me to buy a car. If we do it together, he gets the refund (if any) applied to his tax bill that the divorce says he owes alone and I get nothing. If I slpit my refund with him, I wouldn't be able to buy the car so it wouldn't be worth it.
Basically, these are the options:
1. We leave it like it is and file jointly, he pays Uncle Sam whatever as the divorce says. I owe nothing as of now. Also, I GET nothing, there is NO benefit to me if we file jointly.
2. We file seperately and I get a car with my refund.
Then, there is no benefit to him. That's why I was thinking about offering to let his prosecution slide. As wrong as I think it is, I am not going to do it just for spite, I would lose too. Nothing has been signed except the agreement. I haven't seen the tax papers yet.
He won't learn his lesson, he can't control his anger. He won't go to counseling to learn to deal with it but it doesn't matter to me anymore because he is someone else's problem. Besides, I have a dog and a gun now. The dog likes me and I know how to fire the gun so I feel pretty safe for the moment. And, I did promise not to DROP the charges. I never said anything about pursuing them with gusto...I have to think about what is best for me without letting emotions get in the way. Right now, I think that having a car is best for me. When my Dad brought my step mother's car back here, he did so knowing that he would need to take his car back from me. Now I have the Kia temporarily. It was my aunt's car and the police just released it since the FBI was done with all of the tests. As the conservator of the estate, my father can let me drive the car as long as I am his "agent" in Georgia. He can't GIVE it to me, but he can sell it to me. I can afford it if I do my own taxes. I want to have a car that no one can take away from me. Vex has taken one car from me, left me with a piece of crap car that he cancelled the insurance on and he had our good car repossessed while I was sick last summer. Then, I was able to drive my aunt's second car, but it was financed and the finance company wanted $16,000 as a pay off so I had to give that car back. My dad brought me his and now he needs it back. So, I have the Kia, but to ensure that I have a car that no one can take away from me, I need to buy it ASAP.
So, based on all of this, I think that I am going to call and make the offer but I want to be sure I am considering everything...how does this sound to you guys? Is there anything I am forgetting?
Thanks...
Meg
"...The meretricious cohabitation (sounds like it must be illegal, immoral or fattening : i.e. sounds like fun...) -- that's got to go. It's purely symbolic, it's not worth a dime to either of you, but it's degrading.The tax thing. Did that come up during the mediation? You didn't sign that stuff off on the spot, did you? so your lawyer should have spotted it, surely, and ensured you understood the consequences. Was it a bargaining chip for something specific, or just part of the package?"
Yes, it came up in mediation. If I file alone, I get a refund that would be enough for me to buy a car. If we do it together, he gets the refund (if any) applied to his tax bill that the divorce says he owes alone and I get nothing. If I slpit my refund with him, I wouldn't be able to buy the car so it wouldn't be worth it.
Basically, these are the options:
1. We leave it like it is and file jointly, he pays Uncle Sam whatever as the divorce says. I owe nothing as of now. Also, I GET nothing, there is NO benefit to me if we file jointly.
2. We file seperately and I get a car with my refund.
Then, there is no benefit to him. That's why I was thinking about offering to let his prosecution slide. As wrong as I think it is, I am not going to do it just for spite, I would lose too. Nothing has been signed except the agreement. I haven't seen the tax papers yet.
He won't learn his lesson, he can't control his anger. He won't go to counseling to learn to deal with it but it doesn't matter to me anymore because he is someone else's problem. Besides, I have a dog and a gun now. The dog likes me and I know how to fire the gun so I feel pretty safe for the moment. And, I did promise not to DROP the charges. I never said anything about pursuing them with gusto...I have to think about what is best for me without letting emotions get in the way. Right now, I think that having a car is best for me. When my Dad brought my step mother's car back here, he did so knowing that he would need to take his car back from me. Now I have the Kia temporarily. It was my aunt's car and the police just released it since the FBI was done with all of the tests. As the conservator of the estate, my father can let me drive the car as long as I am his "agent" in Georgia. He can't GIVE it to me, but he can sell it to me. I can afford it if I do my own taxes. I want to have a car that no one can take away from me. Vex has taken one car from me, left me with a piece of crap car that he cancelled the insurance on and he had our good car repossessed while I was sick last summer. Then, I was able to drive my aunt's second car, but it was financed and the finance company wanted $16,000 as a pay off so I had to give that car back. My dad brought me his and now he needs it back. So, I have the Kia, but to ensure that I have a car that no one can take away from me, I need to buy it ASAP.
So, based on all of this, I think that I am going to call and make the offer but I want to be sure I am considering everything...how does this sound to you guys? Is there anything I am forgetting?
Thanks...
Meg
posted by Meg Kelso | 8:59 AM
1 Comments:
He can't GIVE it to me, but he can sell it to me.
Bullshit. He's your father. He can let you use it for as long as you need it, surely. What's wrong with that? Does he really need the money that badly? Do you really have a problem with borrowing a car, long term, from your father? If it's pride, it seems misplaced to me.
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