Well...
...I was thinking that my answer earlier regarding the 3 date thing was still confusing. I referred to two different 3 date things and I didn't make that clear in the least. One 3 date reference was to a time when I mentioned, on a casual, first time meeting type thing, that I never slept with men before the third date. Now, I don't remember what he said to precipitate that comment, but it was a joke...I have no such 3 date rule...I sleep with whom I want when I want. At least I always did in the past, I see no reason to change that now.
One thing I AM going to change is something that I have adopted as a rule:
No sex decisions are to made when I am under the influence of alcohol, period.
I don't usually drink too much unless I am secure that I am in the company of a trusted sober person who has taken responsibility for me. I set that up while I am still sober. I have had to drive myself around lately, in my father's car no less, so I haven't been able to drink that much but I have to have plans for when I do. I don't like drinking at home, there's something sad about that. So, I never have anything to drink in my house...if I did, my son would get to it before I did. If I buy a bottle of anything, it could literally sit there for 6 months before I go to get another drink. When I do, it's always gone. So I end up paying $35 for one screwdriver. I think I am going to start buying those little air plane bottles. I can't believe I didn't think of that earlier, duh.
O.K., the other 3 date thing...it's part of my plan to date as many men as possible so that I can study them. I will be upfront with them about that...I think most men would find it intriguing, at least that's what they would say to my face. They can ask questions if they want to but I would hope they wouldn't spend too much time trying to figure it out, I need to study THEM. To be honest, I haven't decided WHEN to mention my motives, but I'm sure I will find the right time. If I don't I will have a rule to dictate it, like say, at the end of the first date. Yeah, actually, that's good. I think anyway. That way, I could always change my M.O. should my feelings so dictate. I might become so intrigued myself that I forget all about the experiment.
I chose 3 dates because almost ANY man (or woman for that matter) can be sweet and charming for 3 dates. I want to have some fun with some sweet and charming guys so what's the harm? Also, it would take that long for me to decide what to do about any given subject. With some, it might take longer, with some, I will know before we finish the first date but it will probably average out to be about 3 a guy. That's about ten guys a month. Cool beans.
Actually, I doubt that I will have the time to score ten a month, but I will certainly give it a valiant effort. And, like I said, No Lying is the first rule. I will never lie to anyone, watch me.
I can't do any of this until I am divorced so that gives me time to tweak my plan and add to it. As I said earlier, your input will be appreciated.
From what I have been told in my divorce, if you file together EVEN if the divorce papers say he is to pay all of it, YOU can stil be held liable for the money if he doesnt pay it and if he doesnt pay and you get a refund next time THEY will take it from your refund. So you have every right to file married filing seperate. I dont think you have to offer him a DAMN thing. I would just say hey this is how it is.
Well, now, doesn't that give me something to look up? I am on it. Thank you for taking the time to let me know about that.
Do you know for sure that you can't just tell him that you are going to file seperately rather than having to let him off the hook on his criminal activity?
No, I just know that I agreed to it last week. At this point, I would have to offer him something to get out of it. Getting out of it WOULD get me a car.
I never knew about the *677 Cell Phone Feature, but especially for a woman alone in a car, you should not pull over for an unmarked car.
Did you know that you could dial *677 and keep on driving if there is an unmarked car trying to pull you over. I didn't.
File separately, and file charges.
Simple.
LOL, you crack me up, Rita. they caught me off guard the other day and it (mediation) is tough enough as it is...you aren't really thinking straight. They shouldn't hold you to what you agree to on such a day but I did agree to it. It is my own fault for not taking the time to think about the ramifications of everything...it was not an easy experience. We were in the same room. I didn't know we would be. I swore never to look at him again and except for one split second when I glanced away from the mediator, I didn't. I caught his eye for a milli-second and he was looking right at me. I looked away before I could even read the look. He sat immediately in front of me and I was unnerved at the proximity, about 3 feet. Once again, I had the opportunity to ask for special treatment considering the domestic violence, but I honestly thought we would be in separate rooms. Mea frickin' culpa once again.
See ya,
Meg
...I was thinking that my answer earlier regarding the 3 date thing was still confusing. I referred to two different 3 date things and I didn't make that clear in the least. One 3 date reference was to a time when I mentioned, on a casual, first time meeting type thing, that I never slept with men before the third date. Now, I don't remember what he said to precipitate that comment, but it was a joke...I have no such 3 date rule...I sleep with whom I want when I want. At least I always did in the past, I see no reason to change that now.
One thing I AM going to change is something that I have adopted as a rule:
No sex decisions are to made when I am under the influence of alcohol, period.
I don't usually drink too much unless I am secure that I am in the company of a trusted sober person who has taken responsibility for me. I set that up while I am still sober. I have had to drive myself around lately, in my father's car no less, so I haven't been able to drink that much but I have to have plans for when I do. I don't like drinking at home, there's something sad about that. So, I never have anything to drink in my house...if I did, my son would get to it before I did. If I buy a bottle of anything, it could literally sit there for 6 months before I go to get another drink. When I do, it's always gone. So I end up paying $35 for one screwdriver. I think I am going to start buying those little air plane bottles. I can't believe I didn't think of that earlier, duh.
O.K., the other 3 date thing...it's part of my plan to date as many men as possible so that I can study them. I will be upfront with them about that...I think most men would find it intriguing, at least that's what they would say to my face. They can ask questions if they want to but I would hope they wouldn't spend too much time trying to figure it out, I need to study THEM. To be honest, I haven't decided WHEN to mention my motives, but I'm sure I will find the right time. If I don't I will have a rule to dictate it, like say, at the end of the first date. Yeah, actually, that's good. I think anyway. That way, I could always change my M.O. should my feelings so dictate. I might become so intrigued myself that I forget all about the experiment.
I chose 3 dates because almost ANY man (or woman for that matter) can be sweet and charming for 3 dates. I want to have some fun with some sweet and charming guys so what's the harm? Also, it would take that long for me to decide what to do about any given subject. With some, it might take longer, with some, I will know before we finish the first date but it will probably average out to be about 3 a guy. That's about ten guys a month. Cool beans.
Actually, I doubt that I will have the time to score ten a month, but I will certainly give it a valiant effort. And, like I said, No Lying is the first rule. I will never lie to anyone, watch me.
I can't do any of this until I am divorced so that gives me time to tweak my plan and add to it. As I said earlier, your input will be appreciated.
From what I have been told in my divorce, if you file together EVEN if the divorce papers say he is to pay all of it, YOU can stil be held liable for the money if he doesnt pay it and if he doesnt pay and you get a refund next time THEY will take it from your refund. So you have every right to file married filing seperate. I dont think you have to offer him a DAMN thing. I would just say hey this is how it is.
Well, now, doesn't that give me something to look up? I am on it. Thank you for taking the time to let me know about that.
Do you know for sure that you can't just tell him that you are going to file seperately rather than having to let him off the hook on his criminal activity?
No, I just know that I agreed to it last week. At this point, I would have to offer him something to get out of it. Getting out of it WOULD get me a car.
I never knew about the *677 Cell Phone Feature, but especially for a woman alone in a car, you should not pull over for an unmarked car.
Did you know that you could dial *677 and keep on driving if there is an unmarked car trying to pull you over. I didn't.
File separately, and file charges.
Simple.
LOL, you crack me up, Rita. they caught me off guard the other day and it (mediation) is tough enough as it is...you aren't really thinking straight. They shouldn't hold you to what you agree to on such a day but I did agree to it. It is my own fault for not taking the time to think about the ramifications of everything...it was not an easy experience. We were in the same room. I didn't know we would be. I swore never to look at him again and except for one split second when I glanced away from the mediator, I didn't. I caught his eye for a milli-second and he was looking right at me. I looked away before I could even read the look. He sat immediately in front of me and I was unnerved at the proximity, about 3 feet. Once again, I had the opportunity to ask for special treatment considering the domestic violence, but I honestly thought we would be in separate rooms. Mea frickin' culpa once again.
See ya,
Meg
posted by Meg Kelso | 12:42 PM
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