Sol says that...
"...I didn't know this, but February 13 is "Mistress Day"..."
She's right. Mistresses are now getting their own Hallmark Day and it's on the day before Valentine's Day because:
"...Most cheaters devote the day before Valentine's to keeping their mistresses happy, since waiting until the day after makes them seem like an afterthought..."
I bet they do. If we think about it a bit more we can figure out more little tricks like that. If we think about our own marriages, a LOT of us could come up with more. If they've picked up on this new "norm", cheating has to be quite prevalent. And all of my experience, from being married to being single has taught me that there are a HELLUVA lot of cheaters out there who are TOTALLY getting away with it. I certainly had no idea that Rick was cheating on me...he never went anywhere. Of course in hindsight I see what was happening but I wasn't looking for it at the time before so it got past me.
Ladies (and gentlemen), next year you need to remember this, "It's February 13th...do you know where YOUR spouse is?" I suppose some of them might pull the old switcharoo so maybe you better be careful for a couple of days...just in case. :)
"...I'm sure clients 1-5 are sweating thick bullets cause they don't' want to be found out!..."
Damn girl, that's what I was going to say. I was sitting on the balcony, staring out at the trees and thinking...who was number 8? Hell, who was number 1!? My inquiring mind HAS to know.
Do you suppose that BJ Billy is saying, "Dude! You PAID for it?! You should have called me, I got a million of 'em!" I bet even Hillary has a number or two of some cute chicks. See, this is a problem. If men keep getting pinched going to public sperm dumps they'll start to consider hiring their own little dump. They might have a better chance of keeping it secret if only one person knows.
Of course, if only one person knows...that one person could be bumped off if things started to get out of control. And think about it...if you were the ONLY person who had been witness to Spitzer's crimes and the two of you were on a row boat (don't ask...just go with me here) and he had the oars, a gun and a giant anchor, don't you think he'd shoot you, throw you overboard and row away, back to his happy, completely bullshit life? How will we ever know? Hopefully we won't. But names like Chandra Levy pop up and I start to wonder to what lengths these people will go in order to hold on to what they have and acquire more of what they want. If Spitzer is so so arrogant as to think that he can get away with all of this...I'm sure that he can work up at least a temporary murderous impulse. And these folks don't have a lot of impulse control. Anyway, that's my bet.
Back to the rest of the client list...I want it. If any Emperor's Club folks are out there and feel like sending me a copy of that list, I'd appreciate it. I only need 1-10 so it's not that big of a deal, really. I'll even give you an alibi someday if you need one!
Wouldn't you hate to be Number 10 and be a good looking guy with hair? A guy with a great job, great car and all the rest. Maybe a star or something. Maybe Brad Pitt is jonesing for a flat belly every so often and he stumbles upon The Emperor's Club website. He makes friends with some chick named Slutola. He pays her 5 grand an hour to dress up like Jennifer Anniston and act interested in HIM. The poor guy has got to be sick of bowing at the foot of Queen Jolie as she lays eggs over and over again for him to care for. 5 grand is nothing to these guys...they'd pay it for the "safety" of the service itself. After all, only such high priced call girls would do. They should be paid well enough to keep them from ratting him out. After all, the first rule of cheating (for the smart crowd anyway) is that you only cheat with a person who has as much to lose as you do. Of course, the girls can keep quiet all day long...if those "pesky little Feds" show up...that's the whole enchilada.
Ol' Brad...er...Client Number 10...is "sweating thick bullets" as Sol said. I'm sure a LOT of them are.
I have an idea...see if you can come up with your own list...I'm going to think up a "dream list" that I'd like to see.
See if you can come up with a few names while I'm writing mine. I'll be back within an hour to post my list and if you don't like it, you can tell me why.
BRB!
OK, I'm back for a minute. I have the top ten list for the Clients but I have to stay near Jean for a little while right now. She tripped over her shoe and I'm afraid to leave her alone. I'll be back when my father comes home from the club.
:)
"...I didn't know this, but February 13 is "Mistress Day"..."
She's right. Mistresses are now getting their own Hallmark Day and it's on the day before Valentine's Day because:
"...Most cheaters devote the day before Valentine's to keeping their mistresses happy, since waiting until the day after makes them seem like an afterthought..."
I bet they do. If we think about it a bit more we can figure out more little tricks like that. If we think about our own marriages, a LOT of us could come up with more. If they've picked up on this new "norm", cheating has to be quite prevalent. And all of my experience, from being married to being single has taught me that there are a HELLUVA lot of cheaters out there who are TOTALLY getting away with it. I certainly had no idea that Rick was cheating on me...he never went anywhere. Of course in hindsight I see what was happening but I wasn't looking for it at the time before so it got past me.
Ladies (and gentlemen), next year you need to remember this, "It's February 13th...do you know where YOUR spouse is?" I suppose some of them might pull the old switcharoo so maybe you better be careful for a couple of days...just in case. :)
"...I'm sure clients 1-5 are sweating thick bullets cause they don't' want to be found out!..."
Damn girl, that's what I was going to say. I was sitting on the balcony, staring out at the trees and thinking...who was number 8? Hell, who was number 1!? My inquiring mind HAS to know.
Do you suppose that BJ Billy is saying, "Dude! You PAID for it?! You should have called me, I got a million of 'em!" I bet even Hillary has a number or two of some cute chicks. See, this is a problem. If men keep getting pinched going to public sperm dumps they'll start to consider hiring their own little dump. They might have a better chance of keeping it secret if only one person knows.
Of course, if only one person knows...that one person could be bumped off if things started to get out of control. And think about it...if you were the ONLY person who had been witness to Spitzer's crimes and the two of you were on a row boat (don't ask...just go with me here) and he had the oars, a gun and a giant anchor, don't you think he'd shoot you, throw you overboard and row away, back to his happy, completely bullshit life? How will we ever know? Hopefully we won't. But names like Chandra Levy pop up and I start to wonder to what lengths these people will go in order to hold on to what they have and acquire more of what they want. If Spitzer is so so arrogant as to think that he can get away with all of this...I'm sure that he can work up at least a temporary murderous impulse. And these folks don't have a lot of impulse control. Anyway, that's my bet.
Back to the rest of the client list...I want it. If any Emperor's Club folks are out there and feel like sending me a copy of that list, I'd appreciate it. I only need 1-10 so it's not that big of a deal, really. I'll even give you an alibi someday if you need one!
Wouldn't you hate to be Number 10 and be a good looking guy with hair? A guy with a great job, great car and all the rest. Maybe a star or something. Maybe Brad Pitt is jonesing for a flat belly every so often and he stumbles upon The Emperor's Club website. He makes friends with some chick named Slutola. He pays her 5 grand an hour to dress up like Jennifer Anniston and act interested in HIM. The poor guy has got to be sick of bowing at the foot of Queen Jolie as she lays eggs over and over again for him to care for. 5 grand is nothing to these guys...they'd pay it for the "safety" of the service itself. After all, only such high priced call girls would do. They should be paid well enough to keep them from ratting him out. After all, the first rule of cheating (for the smart crowd anyway) is that you only cheat with a person who has as much to lose as you do. Of course, the girls can keep quiet all day long...if those "pesky little Feds" show up...that's the whole enchilada.
Ol' Brad...er...Client Number 10...is "sweating thick bullets" as Sol said. I'm sure a LOT of them are.
I have an idea...see if you can come up with your own list...I'm going to think up a "dream list" that I'd like to see.
See if you can come up with a few names while I'm writing mine. I'll be back within an hour to post my list and if you don't like it, you can tell me why.
BRB!
OK, I'm back for a minute. I have the top ten list for the Clients but I have to stay near Jean for a little while right now. She tripped over her shoe and I'm afraid to leave her alone. I'll be back when my father comes home from the club.
:)
posted by Meg Kelso | 5:01 AM
1 Comments:
I still just cannot understand how the wife can just stand there being all supportive. He was man enough to do the deed, why does he now need her by his side. It kills me.
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