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Hi. I'm trying to think of another description to put here. Any ideas? I'll try again at 420.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Good morning folks!!!

I hope you all had a nice 3-day weekend. I'm sure the teachers did.

My intention was to write something amusing but like the night at The Funny Farm, I'm empty. I have no excuse like liquor, weed or noise...it's just so early that I'm the only one awake, it's still dark out and I've already been outside to feed squirrels and rabbits. I had a couple of rabbits show up, but the squirrels seem to be hitting their snooze. Luckily, no foxes have crossed the street yet. They frighten me.

My friend's kitchen is great for feeding animals. Almost everything in there is expired. And I don't mean they expired last month, I mean they expired last year. So, naturally I am feeding it all to rodents outside, much better than feeding them inside. My friend is 18 months away from a starring role on Hoarders and refuses to throw away anything. She was never like this before but it's absolutely enigmatic what a dreadful spouse can do to a perfectly good person. No one knows that better than I. Of course, that's not to take away personal responsibility, but hell, some yahoos can really do a head trip on a person.

Anyway, I've fed the animals about 50 bucks worth of dried apricots, raisins and nuts this week. The raisins were so old that they had developed their own little raisin Bettina all over their surfaces. It was enough to make me wear gloves but not enough to refrain from feeding them to the squirrels. I figure they can smell poison. Ooh, I sure hope they can.

My goal here is to eventually become that crazy old lady who feeds squirrels right out of her hand. Wish me luck.

To that end, I should get out there soon. The short, hideous bi-ped mammals will wake up soon and then life is over until they leave for school. For some inexplicable reason, the 2 kids each go to schools that stagger the times. One kid leaves early and comes home early. The other, leaves late and gets home late. That leaves very little time for mental health in between kiddies. 3 AM is pretty much all I get so off I am to feed the creatures that CAN'T talk back!

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