OK...
...I have the smiling sillies over a man I’ve yet to meet. Isn’t that ridiculous? That’s ok, I’m known for doing stuff like that. Well, I was anyway. Now, I’m gonna get that reputation again. Rick couldn’t have chosen a better time to act all aloof and as though he didn’t care at all. And, Todd couldn’t have chosen a better time to contact me. I’m walking around smiling for no good reason and I like it.
OK, seriously, well, sort of...I wrote a silly thing the other day about how I would like to see more naked men. I meant in the movies...but I have my fill of them now. It’s amazing how many men are willing to take a picture of their pride and joy and send it to a stranger. (I almost said “strange woman”, but I rethought that choice.) What a self confident group you guys are. We women walk around all self-esteemed out and you guys send us pictures of your...selves. I don’t get it. But hell, that’s OK. I am a nurse, after all.
One guy sent me a true “cockshot”. He sent me this picture:
I thought that was cute. Some of the other pictures that I’ve been sent aren’t so cute. But, if you want to see them, let me know and I’ll send you your own personal copy for your private viewing pleasure. So far, I haven’t received any bent shots, I had forgotten what a normal stiffy looked like.
By the way, how many of you guys took me that seriously? And, if it’s THAT easy, I should ask for more stuff. I could use some cash...what with gas prices what they are and all. Oh, and if you have any spare diamonds, I would like them too, please.
I’m so glad to be out of my grand funk. I had spent a few days there and Todd pulled me out of it. And, I appreciate all of the warnings that I’ve been sent, but trust me on this, Todd is far too funny to be a serial killer.
Other than John Wayne Gacy and his clown outfit, most serial killers are rather un-funny. Todd can make me laugh out loud with an email and very few men can make me laugh out loud without saying something stupid like, “Wanna see the movie Philadelthia?”
You know, this is the Diary of my Divorce and that’s just about here. I can’t imagine a better way to walk into divorce court. It’s always good to have another one waiting when you are getting rid of the old one. And, this is another young one! Although he isn’t THAT young, he's not 29 or anything near my kids age, but he’s a few years younger than I and that’s a good thing since men seem to die a few years earlier. So, actually, he’s perfect, considering the death thing and all. Oh, I’ve seen pictures, he has hair. Now, he DID say that he had a thinning spot, but that’s ok, it’s nice to get a guy with hair and yet one that still has to worry about losing it. You don’t want one that’s TOO confident, now do you? Although, he did send me a confident email this morning. I’ll keep that one to myself.
Well, it rained like an SOB last night and that means that I have to wipe off Payton’s feet before he comes back inside. For such a stupid dog, he's smart enough to lie down in front of the door step when it’s wet outside so that I can wipe off his feet. He must be some type of dog-savant. I’m still hoping to get him on Stupid Pet Tricks, but other than “sit”, “lie down” and “roll over”, he doesn’t really do anything yet. Those aren’t the most unique tricks that you’ll see a dog do. But, I CAN make him get up and run around by saying “Stay!” And, if I want him to jump all over me, all I have to say is, “Get the hell off of me, you stupid dog!” It’s really quite amazing.
OK, I am going to go about my business now. And, I’ll be doing it with a silly grin on my face. I find it so sublimely ironic that this blog has gotten me such a sweet new man...isn’t that odd? And, can you imagine a guy reading this thing and still WANT to meet me? I like his chutzpah. He knows what I’m capable of and yet he has the confidence to say, “Hey lady, I’ll do ya!” That can only mean one of two things, either he knows that he wouldn’t do anything so stupid as to get his ass on this thing in a bad way or he is just a glutton for punishment. Either way, I can oblige him.
OK, see ya!
Meg
...I have the smiling sillies over a man I’ve yet to meet. Isn’t that ridiculous? That’s ok, I’m known for doing stuff like that. Well, I was anyway. Now, I’m gonna get that reputation again. Rick couldn’t have chosen a better time to act all aloof and as though he didn’t care at all. And, Todd couldn’t have chosen a better time to contact me. I’m walking around smiling for no good reason and I like it.
OK, seriously, well, sort of...I wrote a silly thing the other day about how I would like to see more naked men. I meant in the movies...but I have my fill of them now. It’s amazing how many men are willing to take a picture of their pride and joy and send it to a stranger. (I almost said “strange woman”, but I rethought that choice.) What a self confident group you guys are. We women walk around all self-esteemed out and you guys send us pictures of your...selves. I don’t get it. But hell, that’s OK. I am a nurse, after all.
One guy sent me a true “cockshot”. He sent me this picture:
I thought that was cute. Some of the other pictures that I’ve been sent aren’t so cute. But, if you want to see them, let me know and I’ll send you your own personal copy for your private viewing pleasure. So far, I haven’t received any bent shots, I had forgotten what a normal stiffy looked like.
By the way, how many of you guys took me that seriously? And, if it’s THAT easy, I should ask for more stuff. I could use some cash...what with gas prices what they are and all. Oh, and if you have any spare diamonds, I would like them too, please.
I’m so glad to be out of my grand funk. I had spent a few days there and Todd pulled me out of it. And, I appreciate all of the warnings that I’ve been sent, but trust me on this, Todd is far too funny to be a serial killer.
Other than John Wayne Gacy and his clown outfit, most serial killers are rather un-funny. Todd can make me laugh out loud with an email and very few men can make me laugh out loud without saying something stupid like, “Wanna see the movie Philadelthia?”
You know, this is the Diary of my Divorce and that’s just about here. I can’t imagine a better way to walk into divorce court. It’s always good to have another one waiting when you are getting rid of the old one. And, this is another young one! Although he isn’t THAT young, he's not 29 or anything near my kids age, but he’s a few years younger than I and that’s a good thing since men seem to die a few years earlier. So, actually, he’s perfect, considering the death thing and all. Oh, I’ve seen pictures, he has hair. Now, he DID say that he had a thinning spot, but that’s ok, it’s nice to get a guy with hair and yet one that still has to worry about losing it. You don’t want one that’s TOO confident, now do you? Although, he did send me a confident email this morning. I’ll keep that one to myself.
Well, it rained like an SOB last night and that means that I have to wipe off Payton’s feet before he comes back inside. For such a stupid dog, he's smart enough to lie down in front of the door step when it’s wet outside so that I can wipe off his feet. He must be some type of dog-savant. I’m still hoping to get him on Stupid Pet Tricks, but other than “sit”, “lie down” and “roll over”, he doesn’t really do anything yet. Those aren’t the most unique tricks that you’ll see a dog do. But, I CAN make him get up and run around by saying “Stay!” And, if I want him to jump all over me, all I have to say is, “Get the hell off of me, you stupid dog!” It’s really quite amazing.
OK, I am going to go about my business now. And, I’ll be doing it with a silly grin on my face. I find it so sublimely ironic that this blog has gotten me such a sweet new man...isn’t that odd? And, can you imagine a guy reading this thing and still WANT to meet me? I like his chutzpah. He knows what I’m capable of and yet he has the confidence to say, “Hey lady, I’ll do ya!” That can only mean one of two things, either he knows that he wouldn’t do anything so stupid as to get his ass on this thing in a bad way or he is just a glutton for punishment. Either way, I can oblige him.
OK, see ya!
Meg
posted by Meg Kelso | 2:40 AM
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