Damn...

...I'm in a hotel lobby because this is the only Internet access that I have. I brought a laptop with me but I had a hard enough time making long distance calls, getting the remote to work and using the microwave. I didn't want to tax the chick further and ask her how to hook up a lap top computer.

I woke up at 5 AM, an hour before my wake-up call (which should be coming right about...NOW! It's exactly 6 AM.) because of the ridiculously loud and obnoxious "tone" of a TV channel gone off the air. I don't know how long I spent listening to the stupid thing before I finally just got up to turn it off. As I said, the remote didn't work. Anyway, once I woke up, that was it...I couldn't even pretend to go to sleep at that point...I'd only have to wake up again in an hour and it takes me an hour to fall asleep. So, I got up and watched the news.

I saw more about Charlton Heston's death. That's too bad. I met him once at a political rally. He was up on a bandstand in the Marietta Square and I planned my timing so that I would walk past him before the security guys with Heston and Dan Quayle got close enough to push us out of the way. I can be good at being a pest if I think about it. I've met more famous people doing stuff like that than I can remember. Everybody from Bob Hope to Mr. Brady...I've met the most off the wall famous people. They're actually all over and not tough to find if you pay attention.

I digressed again. I meant to tell you that I had gotten Heston's autograph when I met him. I had an Internet friend, an old man named Ken who lives in Wisconsin, back in my old AOL chat room days. That had to be in the 90's. I'm sure it was. Anyway, I sent him the autograph. Somewhere in my house I have the news clip of him signing the spiral notebook that I gave him to sign. You couldn't see me but you could see him signing the paper and I wanted to send that to Ken too. But I never came across it once I stopped watching VCR tapes. I'd have to stick in every tape that I have and look for the stupid clip to send him that and if I haven't found it in 10 years...I'm not gonna find it.

OK then...the continental breakfast is finally ready. That is why I'm still here. I would have just jumped in my car and trotted home if not for the promise of a ""Supreme" Continental Breakfast. Now that I look at it, it's nothing particularly supreme. I thought maybe someone brought a bunch of hard boiled eggs or something. The only thing "Supreme" about this continental breakfast is the fact that they have Sugar Pops. (Of course now they call it simply Pops...they don't want to imply what we already know...the shit is full of sugar and kids love it. Call it dog shit if you must...it is what it is.) Anyway, I waited here for breakfast and all I wanted was the one tiny little cheese danish that they had. That sucker was all the way in back. I lost half of the glaze trying to grab that bastard with the plastic tong.

Now I got dragged into a discussion about that polygamist "compound". I think we should change the definition of that word. It connotes negativity and it should connote a place that the government is investigating. Now that I think of it...I'm going to change that definition the best way I know how...on that urbandictionary.com site. See ya...I gotta run!

:)

Oh, by the way...I found the Supremacy...waffles. But I found them as I was pouring myself a cup of very weak coffee. They have small cups...not at all the type that you would use to suck as you drive. Well, they’ve underestimated me. I’ll take ten of those suckers...or 4.

:)