OK...so perhaps I was harsh...

...yesterday when I discussed my children but I have days like that. When I spend too much time remembering what my daughter did to me beginning this past summer and continuing to this very day, I go a bit nuts. She is withholding my grandson from me and the pain is to the core of my soul.  I know it hurts him as well but as her father before her, my daughter has an easy time accepting that separating loved family members is an acceptable practice...pain and damage it causes be damned.)

I won't totally defend myself, because to do so would be to do irreparable harm to my daughter and I can't do that and still face the chick in the mirror. But the last day I saw my daughter and my beautiful grandson, I was tackled by 2 Los Angeles police officers (With the dishonest and unnecessary, "Stop resisting". I remember Officer Maier repeating it over and over) handcuffed, led through an apartment complex and escorted to a mental hospital where I was held against my will until I could see a doctor who deemed me no danger to myself nor others. I was then released after being locked up in a hideous place for over 24 hours.

Pardon me as I digress for a moment, but I feel the need to tell this story. The officer, another one who mistake my hands for cuff-able, cuffed me behind my back and tossed me onto his back seat made of hard plastic. I immediately removed the handcuffs. I kept my hands behind me and held on to each cuff but still, you'd think he would have noticed while he escorted me out of his car and into the hospital. Whatever. I was led to a small waiting area where the cop and I chatted. After all, I'm NOT nuts. He bragged about being a recon sniper in some mid-east country (something you don't often hear from a vet .) and actually stated, "If it weren't for people like me, Americans would have no civil-rights." The irony of being taken against my will to a place that I did not belong forced guffaws from deep in my gut.

For the cops to have taken an obviously sane woman to a padded room doesn't just happen. I knew they had to have some reason that they were putting so much effort into finding a reason to take me away. I wasn't suicidal (I'd tell you if I were, you know that), I certainly didn't want to hurt a soul, I had been spending 98% of my time literally sitting on the floor playing trains, playing with puzzles and putting my grandson up in the air on my feet so he could "fly like a bird." We had done those things that morning. Up until then, my daughter had left him with me often saying, "I do anything to keep him away from my mother-in-law." My daughter doesn't like the woman who can't even speak English. She even developed a new Thanksgiving tradition of leaving town to avoid her in-laws. Those are her words. Anyway, that baby and I fell in love immediately and nothing can take that away from us. My daughter can try, but she know her son adores me and she is refusing to allow him to brag to his grandma that he knows what a "Q" is. I was teaching him letters and he was having trouble with the letter Q. He tried to tell me but the phone was swiftly cut-off.

Then one morning, my daughter asked when I was leaving. I had planned to leave her home that day. Of course, I would still visit, but living together wasn't working. I only moved in after being robbed twice (at that time). I had held out through the week-end and my daughter and I were OK with the decision. On Tuesday, when I said I was leaving, she asked me to wait there until Wednesday because it was her day off and she would be able to give me any rides I might need. That, and the chance to spend more time with my grandson, made for an easy decision. I agreed to spend one more night. My daughter immediately began her argument du jour but she was on her way to work so she only had time for a few caustically hurtful words and then she was gone.

I sat in a chair crying for about a half an hour and there was a knock on the door. Assuming it wasn't for me, I ignored it. Then a booming voice came through an opened window, MARGARET!!!. THIS IS THE LA PD!" Having nothing to fear from the law, I went to see what they wanted. They told me that my daughter had told them that I was suicidal. For over a half an hour I tried desperately to convince them that I was fine, but obviously upset over the words my daughter had fired at me. They kept leaving to make phone calls and "discuss" the situation. At one point they asked the question, "Have you been eating properly?" I explained my weight loss over the summer due to a broken jaw and numerous broken teeth, and as I was getting to the part where I was about to tell them that I drink a lot of Ensure, they stopped listening to me. As I continued to try to reason with them, they decided to tackle me for "resisting". I watch Cops, I'm not going to ask for trouble. But I got it anyway.

As I said, those cops were intent on taking me away. Obviously they knew something I didn't. My daughter would "NEVER" do this kept going through my mind. I now know that she told them that she was in fear for her safety as well as that of her son's. She told them she didn't think her baby would be safe with his best friend...his grandmother. Since then, she refuses to let me speak to him and blames it on her husband. After her daily reports of how "mad", "really mad" and eventually "beyond mad" I was making her husband, (Hell, I don't even know what that means!) I finally approached her him myself, Fausto, and told him that if he as any problems with anything I do, I wish he would be so respectful and mature as to come to me to discuss any issues. I am not unreasonable but he wouldn't know because the daily "fights" with Fausto never stopped.

At some point I'll probably explain some of the complaints that annoyed Fausto so much, (a biggie...I taught the kid the Spanish word for fart) but whatever you know or think of me, you must know that I couldn't have done anything to deserve what I received.

Merry Christmas to you all!

This has been the first Christmas in recent memory where I was a part of a family gift giving celebration. My sisters, Marie and Lori, both came over with their male counterparts for a lovely Christmas Eve get together. It felt good to be a part of such an occasion, I don't remember the last time I was involved in such a lovely event. It made me happier than my sisters could know.

My gift to myself this year is an odd one. Rather than waiting sadly for calls from my children that never come, I've decided that I'm done waiting. I've also decided to explain what has happened to alienate me from my kids. I'm not going to do it on Christmas Day but soon I will. I'm done protecting adults who care nothing about my feelings so soon you will all know, as will my family, why my children have chosen to cut me out of their lives. I've never explained it because to do so would not show my children in a good light.

Their lack of concern for me and my feelings has finally reached the point where I no longer feel the need to protect them and their secrets. The only way to defend myself would be to tell the truth about them. Also, they have told people things about me that I had entrusted to them. For example, my daughter was always the person I trusted enough to be the person who I assigned as my emergency contact for medical reasons and she was also entrusted to speak to my doctors to receive information about me and my medical condition. I found a message from her to my ex-husband's wife that was about as nasty as it could be and it also contained confidential medical information. That broke my heart.

Enjoy your day, I'm enjoying mine. Come back soon and support me as I tell anyone who wants to know what my children have done to me to bring me to the point where I will finally do something to earn their behavior.

From Rachel Brown of the Dalton Daily Citizen

This is My Aunt Mary Ann Broderick. Married name, Mergel

 

Karen Koense said she knew her older sister wouldn’t just walk out on the family — that couldn’t be why 65-year-old Mary Mergel seemed to just vanish from her Murray County home in early 2004.
“Some people thought she just was so depressed she just took off,” Koense said. “That wasn’t my sister. I know my sister, knew my sister, well. She wanted to come home.”
Mergel had left her family and friends in New Jersey a few years earlier to move near Chatsworth after her only son, Paul, moved south with his three children. She sold a successful hair salon to make the move, and when she couldn’t get medical care for her ailing husband at a Veterans Administration clinic locally, she moved him back north to receive care until his passing in early 2004. She drove back to visit monthly, Koense said.
Then, after her husband died, Mergel made a decision,  Koense said. She would sell her house on the five acres off Devonwood Lane near Chatsworth and move back home. By sometime in March or April, Koense said, she stopped hearing from her sister. Messages went unreturned. When she was able to reach a family member, she got various stories about her sister being off on a trip to Florida or California. Finally, on May, 30, 2004, family in New Jersey filed a missing persons report with the Murray County Sheriff’s Office.
Officers visited the home to do welfare checks. They discovered her belongings had been packed away. No one could find Mary Mergel. Search teams canvased the neighborhood. Dogs were brought in to find her. Neighbors were interviewed. The house was searched. The Georgia Bureau of Investigation became involved.
Finally, Paul Mergel was charged with several offenses related to cashing Mary Mergel’s Social Security checks after her disappearance. He pleaded guilty to seven counts of first degree forgery and possession of a firearm by a convicted felon, went to prison for about a year and was released on probation.
Still, no one seemed to know, or be able to prove, what had happened to Mary Mergel. Authorities continued searching but never found her. Every year, the GBI revisited the case. Family members in New Jersey had Mary Mergel declared legally dead. Neighbors who lived nearby at the time she disappeared moved away.
Then, about two months ago, investigators revisited the case after receiving a tip on where they could find her body. They spent four days searching an area in Murray County. They brought in crime scene specialists and cadaver dogs, but they found nothing.
“We’re getting ready to put a stone on an empty grave because we have no idea where she is,” Koense said. “We miss her. We’ve waited 10 years for something to happen, somebody to find something — and nothing.”
Koense believes someone murdered her sister, and she believes she knows who did it, but she also believes that person may have had an accomplice. Greg Ramey, special agent in charge for the GBI region that includes Murray County, said Mary Mergel disappeared under suspicious circumstances. It’s possible she was murdered, but without a body, nothing can be proven, he said, and it’s also possible that she died of natural causes. No one has been charged in her death. Investigators said that because the investigation is ongoing, they don’t want to publicly say much more than that.
“At this point, we still consider her missing,” Ramey said. “Whether it’s a result of foul play or not, we don’t know. ... Eventually, we feel like with the right information, we feel like we’ll solve this.”
Family members hope something — perhaps Paul Mergel’s arrest or someone coming forward — will eventually lead to authorities finding Mary Mergel. Paul Mergel, 46, of Port Monmouth, N.J., was arrested on drug-related charges in New Jersey earlier this year, officials said. According to area news reports, he was held there on $100,000 bond after authorities learned he was wanted on a probation warrant in Murray County. He was extradited to the Murray County jail on Nov. 21 and remains there without bond.
Assistant Public Defender Betsy Flack said she will represent Paul Mergel in a probation revocation hearing scheduled for Jan. 8 in Murray County Superior Court. He was wanted for failure to report.
Capt. John Cherry of the Murray County Sheriff’s Office said the investigation is ongoing.
Anyone with information on the case is asked to contact Cherry at (706) 695-4592.
Ken Koense, Mary Mergel’s nephew, said staying on top of the case and being able to, in person, press for the deepest investigation possible is difficult to do from hundreds of miles away. He hopes someone nearby can help the family get answers so they can finally have closure.
“There’s not a time when we don’t think about what happened to our aunt, and (we hope) the person we think committed the crime gets justice,” he said.

The press mustn't say what Mary Mergel's family is convinced of:

PAUL MERGEL IS RESPOSIBLE FOR THE DEATH OF HIS MOTHER.

Rot in hell you dirty son of a bitch.

What we know so far

As many of you know, my cousin murdered his mother. She was declared legally dead after 7 years as her body had not been found. That declaration was a few years ago. My hideous cousin (Paul Mergel...I hate claiming relation to him) spent tens of thousands of dollars that belonged to his mother after he killed her. He used her credit cards and forged her name on her checks. At the time she first went missing, her house (Where Paul was living) was searched and numerous guns that had been reported stolen were found. He was then convicted of theft by possession and ordered to serve 2 years door to door, meaning no good time, he had to serve the entire 2 years. He was eventually charged with 7 counts of forgery on my aunt's checks and in return for probation, he plead guilty to all counts. He immediately left the state and has been in New Jersey since then. Obviously, he violated his probation.

In New Jersey, he continued on with his criminal behavior and was arrested 3 times for drug charges. When he went to court in November, New Jersey had finally checked with NCIC and found that he was wanted in Georgia for the probation violation. As a suspect in his mother's murder, Georgia extradited him back where he is today. The GBI and the Murray County Sheriff's office has, naturally, never closed the murder case because, of course, there is no statue of limitations for murder.

Recently, the authorities received a tip that Aunt Mary was buried somewhere on her own property. They are currently searching for her, digging and using cadaver dogs. Hopefully she will be found so that she can be returned to her family who is still waiting for some sort of resolution to this case. Paul is being held on $100,000 bond, no ten percent...he would need to come up with the entire amount. If he hadn't murdered my aunt, he would have inherited more than that. As it stands now, his kids are due that money. But, his two sons lied to the police when Aunt Mary went missing so they probably will not be eligible for the inheritance so the other child, a girl, stands to inherit the money unless one of his sons can do the decent thing. Criminals in their own right, that is unlikely.

My father has been asked to contribute DNA from himself and his younger sister so that when they find the body, they can identify it. We are hopeful that she will be found soon but she owned a big bit of land so the search may take a while.

His arrests in New Jersey had to do with heroin so with any luck at all, he went through a dreadful withdrawal when he was imprisoned.

Here is the article from New Jersey reporting his arrest and extradition:

A Port Monmouth man wanted in Georgia captured by authorities in Freehold last week is awaiting extradition, according to authorities.
Paul R. Mergel, 46, is wanted by the Murray County, Georgia, Sheriff's Office for a probation violation stemming from seven counts of forgery in the first degree, according to a criminal complaint out of Freehold Township Municipal Court.
Authorities discovered the out-of-state warrant during a National Crime Information Center database check on Mergel. They then confirmed the warrant and request for Mergel’s extradition with Murray County officials, according to the complaint signed by Sgt. Elija Moore of the Monmouth County Sheriff’s Office on Oct. 30
Mergel is being held in the Monmouth County Jail on $100,000 bail, no 10 percent option, and is scheduled to appear before a judge on Nov. 12, according to records.

http://middletown-nj.patch.com/groups/police-and-fire/p/police-arrest-port-monmouth-man-wanted-in-Georgia

He is also a suspect in the murder of his girlfriend in New Jersey by setting her home on fire. He's not that bright, so I have to believe that he will, indeed, pay for his crimes.

The murderer of my aunt has been arrested in New Jersey...

...and extradited to New Jersey. I need to make some calls to the detectives and reporters (it's a big story in Atlanta) and I'll be back with e. Things are getting better all the time!

I walked away...

...with my bag-o-belongings. I haven't figured out where to stay yet, but for right now, I'm out of the crazy house so I woke up unafraid for the first time in a while. I'm working on smiling and it works as long as I control what my mind tells me. This is the absolute worse time of my life and trust me, that's saying a lot. But, I know I wouldn't still be here without a good reason so I'll wait as long as I can to find out why I'm here. I'm quite curious to see what happens next.

If anyone out there...

...has a tent that I can carry, a wagon that I could put my stuff in or anything that would help me leave this horrible place, please let me know. If you're in the Tampa area I could get a ride to pick it up, if not, I can't. I have no place to go and like an idiot I came back to a place where abuse is a daily occurrence. I'd rather live in a tent anywhere...it would be safer. I need to get away from here ASAP.

How much should anyone continue...

...to wake up in the morning and expect something to be different? That's the definition of insanity in some circles. I could handle losing my husband, it took a while to get over it but I did. My kids and grandkids are a different story. Different in the way that I'll never get over it. I don't care to wake up and realized my children aren't around and I can't even talk to my grandchildren on the phone, much less see them. I've been through a lot...but this is too much. I love you William, Annie, Timothy, Chandler, Joaquin and Dillon. I always have and I always will.

One Day

"I don't want you to turn out like me."
"Mom, don't feel like that, being like you wouldn't be so bad.

Another Day

"I would have never spoken to my mother like that!"
"Well, you've never been a very good mother."

Only a daughter can pierce your heart so sharply. I'm sure I did it to my mother but I was never as acidic. I could have been, and Lord knows that I can still more than carry my own when it comes to a battle of words. But you can't really let that stuff loose on your own daughter. I love my daughter so much that it literally hurts. But I wish that she had some sort of filter between her thoughts and her mouth.

If I had a spare $46 million...

I'd buy it.

I just loved this guy. When I could still count my age using only fingers...I remember loving Rockwell. He painted what I wanted. I still love his work and for the same reason, I want the life he portrayed. I've just never been able to figure out how to get it.









http://news.msn.com/pop-culture/rockwell-painting-sells-for-dollar46m-at-nyc-auction