This is the third time that I've begun writing this post. The first time, I minimized it and it went away, the second time, it just went away by itself. I don't know if the server saved those posts but I'm going to just write this one in Notepad and copy and paste it this time instead of writing it in the post itself.
Each time I write this over again, I decide to leave out some of the last post. This one should work, like I said, the others may have been saved so I may just copy and paste some of them into this one if they did save.
As I was saying...a few times...I am surprised by the answers to the poll questions. I understand why we had the sexual revolution of the 70's, we were rebelling against the "uptight" attitude that our parents had towards sex. You would think that at some point, young people would rebel against the older people in the opposite direction and NOT have sex but the attitude towards it is getting less and less "strict" as time goes by. AIDS put a hold on sex to some degree, but I think that young people still feel so immune to anything so they just go ahead and do what ever feels good.
The older values seem to be gone for good. No one seems to put any value on sex and their own bodies anymore, at least not in the way that my parents and their contemporaries would have. I wonder how much of that has to do with the media.
When I was in 8th grade, I took an economics class and they discussed subliminal advertising. The specific example that they gave us was that of liquor ads and the fact that the bubbles in the drinks were actually in the shape of phallic symbols and female body parts. The other day, I saw an ad for make up. In the ad, they poured make up (liquid foundation) out and it flowed in the shape of a female body. That was blatant subliminal advertising, to be sure.
Most of what we see isn't so "hidden". Things on commercials today would have earned an R rating in movies a few decades ago. Soap operas and even regular programming seem to glamorize sex so much that they've pretty much made it seem normal to people nowadays. Maybe it is me and the fact that I've been around for so long, but I was raised to think that sex was a gift that you gave the person that you loved, not just a fun activity. It's no longer that type of gift. It seems to be just a recreation that is a hell of a lot of fun now.
Most women (I can say this because I've spoken to enough of them) don't enjoy sex as much as men do. Not in the same way anyhow. We just don't "get off" the same way and for most of us, it takes a while for us to "train" a man properly. That's one reason that I wouldn't want to have sex before I knew a guy. Sure, they'd have fun, it works for them pretty easily. But it would take a good while before they learned what I enjoyed. It would even take a while before they cared one way or another. It's the rare man that would take a woman on the first night and say, "I'm not going to enjoy myself until I'm sure that you're pleased."
If I thought that a man would have that attitude, I would certainly be more inclined to have sex with him. Of course, I wouldn't feel close enough to a guy to let him know what I enjoyed on the first date so it probably just wouldn't happen. I couldn't imagine how I could feel that comfortable with a guy on the first date. Even if you left out all of the old values and just looked at sex as a recreation, it wouldn't be possible for me to know a guy well enough to let them know what I wanted before I became very close to him.
I dated Rick for about 4 years before I ever "enjoyed" sex. I did enjoy it so far as I felt close to him, but I certainly didn't enjoy it like he did. It doesn't always take years to get to know a man, it just took that long with Rick because it was that long before he even bothered to ask if I was enjoying it. I haven't been with that many men but the few that I have been with have usually cared enough to think of me and what I enjoyed.
Whatever their intentions, it just wouldn't be likely that a guy would be able to make it worth my while to have sex on the first date so I just won't do it. If I met some great guy that made me feel as though it WOULD be a good idea, I'd still be concerned that he would think ill of me for doing it. I'm going to add a question to the poll for my own curiosity about what guys think of a chick that "does".
Anyway, I just re-flooded my living room. I couldn't believe it. I was on the phone telling someone about how I was up all night soaking up a flood that happened last night and as I was telling him about that, it was flooding again. Now there's no way that I can avoid renting a steam cleaner for the stupid carpet. That's OK, I needed to wash the stupid thing anyway as part of my spring cleaning, I just couldn't justify the money that it would have cost to do so. Now, I have no choice.
Rick is having problems with his "friend". I don't know why he bothers to go out of his way to try to convince me that she's anything less than a girlfriend but he does. I don't ask any questions, I just told him to have her stop calling me. Then he went out of his way to tell me how she was just his "friend", nothing more. See how he lies when there isn't even a reason? I'll never understand that. There's just no reason anymore. He said that she knew everything about him. I asked if she knew about the blog and he said yes. So, if she DOES know about it, she shouldn't have any questions for me, I've certainly put it all out here for the world to see.
I asked him why she would be calling me and he said, "Maybe she wanted to hear all the dirt about me." That makes no sense. Why would a friend go out of their way to learn "dirt" about someone? A girlfriend would, but not a friend. See what I've dealt with all these years? He would lie for no reason whatsoever. I guess a liar is just so used to lying that they don't know any other way to act. Oh well. If the chick HAS read this ting, she certainly shouldn't be surprised to find out that he does lie. I, on the other hand, was surprised. Rick comes across as such a sincere, nice, laid back guy. You wouldn't ever expect him to be something totally different.
My sister who reads this would tell you that. Anyone who knew Rick would say that he's a great guy. He's one of those people that everyone likes until they get to know him well enough to see what kind of a person he is. When I DID figure it out, I was embarrassed to tell anyone because I knew how much everyone liked him and how hard it would be to believe that he could do the things that he did. You would NEVER expect him to be abusive, he seems to be such a sweetheart and gentle man that he would be one of the last people you would expect to be violent.
Speaking of my sister, her daughter just called me to say that she is moving from Illinois to Florida. She'll need a place to stay on her way down here so I said that she could stay here. Of course she could. There's only one person in my family that I would ever say "No" to and the niece isn't one of them. She's bringing her fiance. I didn't know she was engaged. My sister reads this so she's pretty up to date about what's going on in my life. She doesn't need to call me because she already knows everything. On the other hand, I don't know anything about her life now. Her daughter told me that she just closed on her new house and that she's moving. I didn't know that.
Hey sis, call me...OK?
OK, I need to clean up some of the flood here. It's a shame that FEMA won't help.
I'll be back after I wade through the living room a bit.