Oh...

...I found this one too:

Sure has been one of those days. I went into a gas station today. Asked for $5 worth of gas. The clerk farted and gave me a receipt.

Tee Hee

I found this...

...at a new site that I frequent and I thought that you guess would like it:

Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America , Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred to as "HILLBILLIES." You must now refer to us as APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS.

And furthermore ... HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a "BREASTED AMERICAN."
2. She is not a "SCREAMER" or a "MOANER" - She is "VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE."
3. She is not "EASY" - She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE"
4. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a "LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."
5. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a "PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."
6. She is not an "AIRHEAD" - She is "REALITY IMPAIRED."
7. She does not get "DRUNK" or "TIPSY" - She gets "CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED"
8. She does not have "BREAST IMPLANTS" - She is "MEDICALLY ENHANCED."
9. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE."
10. She is not a "TRAMP" - She is "SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED"
11. She does not have "MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS" - She is "PECTORALLY SUPERIOR."
12 She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST PROVIDER."

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a "LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.”
2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."
3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He "INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS."
4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION"
5. He is not a "CRADLE ROBBER" - He prefers "GENERATIONAL DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS."
6. He does not get "FALLING-DOWN DRUNK" - He becomes "ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL."
7. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" - He develops a case of "RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."
8 He is not a "MALE CHAUVINIST PIG" - He has "SWINE EMPATHY."
9. He is not afraid of "COMMITMENT" - He is "RELATIONSHIP CHALLENGED."
10. He is not "HORNY" - He is "SEXUALLY FOCUSED."
11 It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants - It's "REAR CLEAVAGE."

Thanks to Huss for letting me post this! I hope you all enjoyed it as much as I did!

Meg

OMG!!!

No wonder Lim Gal heard about me on the radio this morning...that interview was on yesterday! They told me they'd air it in May so I was just starting to get ready to wait for it. Well, I found it...online though. Now an Atlanta radio station want's to interview me! This is cool!

I have NO shame!

Meggers

Is it me...

...or is that a stiffie?

Ah...

...I love a day at the lake...don't you? That doesn't really look like Montana...does it? He lives very near the Rockies. I don't know one way or another but I bet it was taken here before he left which means that when this picture was taken, I was in Chicago visiting my daughter. I could be wrong, but it really doesn't matter. I wonder who had the sandy foreplay in a bottle?

Oh well. Cocky MoFo that he is...did he really think I would let that stupid saying go without saying anything? What have we learned here children? Do NOT believe anything you read on a person's online profile. A cheater will imply that he is good person like a heavy person refers to themselves as "weight proportionate with height" and like a 40 year old woman claims to be 33.

You know, I easily fall for stuff like that. I would actually think, "What a good guy." after I read something like that on a stranger's page. It's stunning that they would pretend to be nice...are they purposely setting a trap for women stupid enough to believe that crap? I'm starting to think so. I used to think that they didn't do it on purpose, that it was all subconscious. But after seeing Rick's little saying, I MUST give them the credit for being the manipulating chugs that they are. Damn...I'm still learning.

When you get to be my age, you sort of start to slow down in the head. For some reason I thought that the other day was May 1rst. That's when I said I would start my Count Down to 50. I know now that's it's STILL not May so when it IS, I will begin my 60 day Count Down to 50. Be sure to check it out every so often.

Oh, by the way, do you remember when the news people came to my house in March...or was it February? I don't know. Anyway, they said that the show would be aired in May. That's all I got from them at the time. I could call and ask but I probably won't. I'll just wait and keep an eye out. This should be interesting! Notice I never told you what it's about...that's because it's a surprise...she said with an evil grin on her face.

Oh, I won my match last night at the pool league. They put me up against a girl so it was like taking candy from a baby. Most chicks are pretty easy to beat, hell, most dudes are easy to beat. But every so often you run into a chick who can shoot well. This chick wasn't one of them. I took her in 2 games and my captain, who was facing her (I had my back to her) told me that she was crying after I beat her. I don't know why...that's just what I was told. After I beat her, I went to shake her hand and she turned her back on me. I'm not sure why...but I think it had something to do with my push up bra and my low cut shirt.

Do you ladies have push ups bras? It's amazing what a difference one makes in the way men treat you. I was primped and "pushed up" and on the way to pool I had to pick up some band-aids. (I just needed a dot band-aid for a sore on my face but the only ones that had dots had square dots. What the hell is that all about? A square dot on your face is like a paisley mitt on a bad pitcher. I figured if I had to wear a huge, obtrusive square, I might as well just get cute so I bought SquareBob Spongepants band-aids. The best size they had was a small rectangle...and it sort of took away from the cleavage...but I thought it was cute.

Anyway...I think it was the push up bra that irritated the poor loser that I whipped. Their entire team was laughing and telling jokes while I was shooting. My captain said that you couldn't do anything unless they were outright belittling me. So, even though I think they were and we just heard the loud laughter, I put it out of my mind and shut them up with a couple of killers shots including one 8 ball that I sunk in the corner to my left even though the ball was all the way down on the opposite rail on the right. That seriously shut them up. I'm a good sport but if I come up against a bad sport, I can be very good at winning. I even got a couple of my own digs in...but the things I said were nice, it's just when I said them. I was subtle yet distracting...like a velvet hammer. And of course, I had a sweet smile on my face.

Anyway, back to the push up bra. The check out guy at Publix, some man in the Quik-Trip and all the guys who were practicing with me before they knew I was on a different team, were treating me far too nicely. There were 4 or 5 tables at the place I played at and they all had league games going on. I went early to practice, getting there before most all of the league people. So, these people just thought I was a chick shooting pool alone. Now...getting hit on it a bar doesn't really count...especially at midnight but this was 6 PM. And they were all just so fricking NICE to me that I finally thought..."This fucking bra WAS worth 50 bucks! Thanks Victoria Secret's!"

Oh jeez, I'm listening to Petula Clark sing "Downtown" but in German. I have to fix that...it made me forget what I was writing about.

BRB.

Rick was dumb enough...

...to contact me through MySpace, showing me his sweet little saying next to his picture:

"If we Treated everybody the way, we would want to be treated, then this world would be a better place"

OMG! Oh well, if he didn't act like he was decent, no one would fuck him. I love how he's still in a "naughty" mood!

http://profile.myspace.com/73756565

What a JOKE!

Another Opinion Post---All of this is my opinion

Double Murderer Paul Mergel...

...have fun while you can. I've been in touch with America's Most Wanted and now that you've made yourself a fugitive, I can get your ugly puss on national TV. All AMW needs is some police reports and Detective Morrison is getting them for me from the GBI:

Meg,

Since the GBI was involved in this case I will have to get their approval to release those documents to you. I don't think it will be a problem, just give me a few days to speak with the agent in charge.

Brett Morrison

You may be able to run, but as they say, you can't hide. It must BLOW to live looking over your shoulder 24/7!!!

Your cuz

The following post is 100% my own opinion-Meg

We found the article...

...about the murder in Jersey...the one that we think my cousin is guilty of setting to kill a girlfriend. You can't tell from reading this that it was a murder, they didn't think so at the time. If they did think that Paul Mergel had anything to do with it, they didn't tell the public.

But I do know for sure that the cops in Georgia think he did this and they must have gotten that idea from the Jersey cops. Also, my aunt told Paul NOT to come to Jersey for his father's funeral because she was afraid that he might be busted for the murder. My aunt herself told her other sisters that.

Actually, the funeral was weeks before my aunt went missing so some of us are wondering if Paul killed his mother because she wouldn't let him go to his father's funeral. Around the time my aunt went missing, Paul called his mother's sister who is also my father's sister. This was the entire conversation:

Isabel: Hello?
Paul: Aunt Isabel, do you know where my father is buried?
Isabel: Why don't you ask your mother? She knows.
Paul: CLICK

That's the last Isabel ever heard from Paul and after that, she never heard from her sister either.

Anyway, this is the article:

The Bayshore Independent
August 15, 2001 Link to Page:
http://independent.gmnews.com/news/2001/0815/Front_Page/011.html
By ELAINE VAN DEVELDE
Staff Writer
HAZLET — A mobile-home fire caused by smoking in bed took the life of a 38-year-old township woman early Saturday, according to Monmouth County Prosecutor John Kaye. According to Kaye, the victim, whom he identified as Michele Miick, was found in her bed in a rear bedroom of her trailer.
Hazlet Detective Jeff Miller said police responded to a 5:50 a.m. call on Aug. 11 reporting a structure fire at 72 Locust Grove Trailer Park, off Route 36, and found the victim in the rear bedroom.
Miller said Monday "positive identification has yet to be confirmed and is pending dental record results and positive identification by family. She recently had some dental work done, so we’re in the process of tracking down her dentist."
He said the fire was extinguished within five to 10 minutes, and an assessment of the situation led police to believe that the accident "was a result of the victim smoking in bed."
Kaye said Monday that a witness had come forward, shedding light on the situation. "This was definitely a case of a woman who was a heavy smoker. That night apparently she was smoking. She had a guest who left because (the victim) was falling asleep. That guest took a cab home minutes before the fire broke out and a neighbor called the police and fire departments. This person has come forward as a very good witness and has helped tremendously with the case. The same person confirmed the woman was left the way she was found — in bed with a cigarette. We know for certain that the source of origin (of the fire) was unquestionably a cigarette," he said.
Added Kaye: "What happens is, in many cases, people get tired and climb into bed to unwind, have a cigarette and watch a little television before dozing off. The cigarette falls, and the situation ends up being a fatality."

This sort of creates more questions than it answers. But the witness who came forward had to be Paul because he's the one who left in a cab 5 "minutes" before the fire broke out. I don't know if they could have taken samples to see if she had been drugged or not, but I'd like to know. Also, I have to wonder exactly what it was that my aunt gave an alibi for. If the cops knew he left the trailer by cab "minutes before the fire broke out", they knew he was there. God forbid there's ANOTHER case that this monster is involved in.

You know, why would we think he isn't involved with any other missing people? In the same way that when a teenager starts having sex, they don't ever go back to being a virgin again, once a person gets away with murder, they have it in them to kill again. And if they get away with it once, they get rather ballsy and try it again. Then, when they get away with it TWICE, they really get cocky. So, if I suddenly disappear from the blogosphere, call the cops and send them looking for Paul Mergel first.

There is no doubt in my mind that this man will kill again if he isn't taken off the streets...NOW!

I think my house is going to burn down...

...and it's all because of the light fixture that my ex fixed a few years ago. I would think that it had something to do with how he fixed it although the fact that it just started acting all fouled up would tend to exonerate the man. I do understand that. But, if you don't mind, I would rather blame my ex husband for whatever I can and I can make a case for placing blame in this situation.

I submit to you the following argument that should back up my case. The lights in the kitchen are occasionally flickering on and off indicating a problem with the wiring...I would think. And Rick would fix something he had never seen before rather than paying someone to come over and do it. The basic fixture change should be relatively easy. I would think it's at least as simple and the thermostat and I did replace one of those at my dad's house. The only problem with the light fixture is that you have to stand on something with your arms up in the air while you work.

I hate that...I have this hideous fear of falling and breaking a hip or something stupid like that. But I do climb up on the counters and walk around when I'm looking for something. That's a bit scary...I hold on to the cabinets and one of these days the cabinet will fail and I'll do down like a ton of bricks. Well, like 120 pounds of bricks anyway. And if you dropped a few bricks from counter height, you could break one. If a brick would break, you know that a person will as well. Especially one so klutzy as myself.

I seem to have broken more than my fair share of bones. I know people who have NEVER broken a bone. I've broken 5. A vertebrae, a wrist, a leg and a foot. I'm not even counting fingers and toes because they DON'T count and you never know for sure because no one goes to the hospital for a broken toe so you don't have x-ray proof of it when they break. The only time I knew for sure was when I went in for a broken arm and the doctor asked if anything else hurt. So, incidentally I did find out that my toe was broken so I know what a broken toe looks and feels like and I'm sure I've had a few others.

Oh, when the doctor told me that the toe was broken, he said that it was broken almost clean across the part where the toe meets the foot. It was a baby toe. He said that the bone could easily come apart and I needed surgery to have a pin placed in my toe. My response took him aback a bit, I said, "How much less is an amputation?"

Some things are just not worth fixing and a baby toe is one of those things.

Anyway, I was talking about walking on the kitchen counters. That's stupid. But even though I know it IS a stupid thing to do, I'll do it again the next time I have to get into one of those cabinets because look how high they are:






You know...I think I'm going to go out and practice shooting pool tonight. It's Monday so no place will be too crowded and tomorrow night the new season for the pool league will start. I will probably miss next week because of the service for Jean and then I know I'll miss a week in May because of a trip I'm taking to Virginia. The more I think about it, the more it occurs to me that I don't have to wait until tonight...I can just go out now. Yeah...I think I'll do that.

That way I'll be home by night time. I'm too old to be hanging out at bars in after dark. It's OK if I'm with my team or a friend, but when I'm alone, the best thing to do is to go during the day so I will. I say I'm too old because it's just occurred to me that, starting tomorrow, I'll be able to say, "I'll be 50 next month."

Tomorrow I'll begin my Countdown to Fifty-Half of a Century Old.

I just can't wait. So, tomorrow I'll be in my countdown so today I need to have fun...it's sort of my last chance. They say that life begins at 40 and that 5o is the new 40 so maybe something good will happen to me soon! According to a recent email that I received, that should happen because I sent it to enough people to qualify for one free wish. I'll let you know when my wish is fulfilled!!!

OMG! Talk about digressing! I was arguing why it was Rick's fault that my house may burn down and I never finished that! OK then, he was the last person to tamper with the wires and if he did it properly, I shouldn't ever have a problem...you can live in houses for years without having something like this happen. I've never had it happen before and I've lived in houses much older than this one.

Why else would the kitchen lights flicker? They only do it occasionally.

I just thought of something...squirrels. I had squirrels in the attic! Do you suppose that they could have chewed on the wires? I don't even know if a rodent in the attic would have any access to the wires but I know that my brothers found a squirrel that had fried itself in our backyard sometime in the 70's. So, I know that they do chew on wires. OK then...crap. Maybe Rick isn't to blame for this. I'll find something...of that you can be sure!!!

Kent satisfies best!

I found this commercial while looking for something to listen to as I clean the kitchen. This is how hard the cigarette companies pushed them years ago...they'd be sued up the ass for this now!!!

You know...

...I've had people say to me that, "You can't be all things to all people." I need to figure out a balance between what I do for myself and what I do for others. I guess I'm a typical nurse, we all take care of everybody else and ignore our own needs. Hell, I don't even think we KNOW what our own needs are, we haven't given it that much thought.

I know that I spend a lot of time helping other people but I don't know what else to do. When I see that a person needs help, it's just my natural response to do my best to help them. I wouldn't think twice...I would just do what I could do. It's so badly ingrained in me to help others that some people take advantage of me. If you help enough people, someone will take advantage of you sooner or later...it's a matter of numbers.

Depending on what the person who is screwing me is doing...or who they are...I may or may not put a quick stop to it. I keep trying to help even after it's become a stupid thing to do. That's how I ended up being married to a chug (someone who cheats like a gangster commits crimes), I just let it go and before I knew it, he would cheat again. Even if he was good for 5 years straight, 5 years goes by pretty quickly and when it comes to cheating it's even faster. The sting lasts for years so even if you DO get over it after a few years, as soon as you do it happens again. I don't know why I allowed that...I guess it's just that when you live with so many little lies, the big ones seem reasonable and Rick lied about the dumbest stuff...just to avoid a conflict. So after a few years of those daily bullshit lies...the deception of cheating came quite easy to miss.

Sometimes I do just tell people who screw me to get lost or I just avoid them all together which is what I've been doing as it pertains to men lately. I know that all of them want sex and until someone really, really earns it, I'm keeping it to myself. I don't care how horny I get, I'm not fucking anyone for a long, long time. Going out with a guy makes me feel stupid, I end up thinking about them too much, waiting to see them too much and talking on the phone too much. It would be one thing if it was worth all of that time, but no guy has been yet. So, I figure the best thing to do is just to stay at home and avoid them all together.

Like I said, my reaction to someone taking advantage of me is dependent upon who the person is. If it's family...I'm a real sucker. But some people push it to the limit and get outright rude to me in a way that I would never, under any circumstances, do to anyone else.

When someone is talking to me, I listen to what they say. I may try to get away if they talk too long but I would listen to any relatively reasonable person speak. It's rude not to, right? Well, I was just talking to my charming son who walked in a little while ago to ask me a favor (which I was happy to do). I was telling him about the genetically altered fish and he said something stupid like, "All aquarium fish are genetically altered to be so small, didn't you know that?"

Well, I just can't believe that MY son would say something so stupid. But I didn't respond, "You're such a moron! Do you really think there's a giant guppy swimming around? Where are the giant tetra?" and then laughed and laughed and laughed. But I wouldn't want to hurt someone's feelings so I just said that I used to catch guppies in a stream with a cup and that they had aquariums when I was a kid without the ability to manipulate genes. Halfway through that sentence, he shouted, "OK...OK...I don't care, just shut up!"

Every so often I act like I have a shred of self respect and I go off on the nit wit who treats me like that. Today I did. I sit here typing quietly for hours and don't say a word. When I talk to my kid I expect to be able to finish a sentence. I remember being very young and being aware that you need to listen to other people when they speak to you. No one told me that, I just knew better somehow. So why is my kid such a jerk? He wasn't raised hearing people tell him to shut up...why would he do it to someone else?

I'm so even tempered that he never, ever would expect me to go off on him. Of course, I can surprise people. And when I do it, I do it like my mother used to do it. I freak asses out.

My father was the disciplinarian in our house and we all knew mom wouldn't hit us...99.9% of the time. But when we pushed her enough, she would lose it (and with 6 kids I'm surprised she didn't lose it more often). The scary thing about her was you never knew what would set her off and you had no clue what she might do...she was totally NUTS when she went off. In a way, my father was much less frightening...you knew the rules and had a chance to avoid being punished. But with Mom, who the heck knew what was gonna happen?

It happened rarely enough that we didn't worry about it too much and when not one of 6 kids is worrying about the noise and the irritation it causes the mother...things can get a bit loud and annoying. She would flip out and you never saw it coming. After all, who was paying any attention to the sum effect of all 6 of us? I was just thinking about what I was doing, not what the other 5 were doing.

At this age, I'm not as wild as my mother was when she was in her 30's...but I can freak the kids out if they push me far enough or push just the right button. And the kid pushed the right button today. So, I got to be a huge bitch until I was sure that the kid wished he had just let me finish my sentence.

Giddy up.

Two of the fish...

...that I have are called glo fish. I didn't know that before, I didn't know anything about them...only that they were pretty fish that I saw at the pet store. I wanted the pink one but they only had one left and the guy said that it was the "display fish" so he couldn't sell it. It was there to advertise things that they don't have. So, I bought the stupid orange one.

Then, the last time that I went to the pet store, they had the pink fish so I finally bought one. I wanted to get the green and yellow as well but I couldn't find them. In order to look online, I needed to find out the name and since I noticed the pregnant one, I wanted to find out what they were today. I had forgotten what the sales dude called them.

I only had to search for a few minutes before I found them...here's a picture of the different colors:

So, I learned the name. I also learned that these are genetically engineered fish that have sparked controversy all over the world according to some dude named "mike" who posted this at Blogiversity.org:

"...While they were essentially "created" in a lab, theoretically only their color has been altered...I have all three colors of these fish, and they really brighten up the tank. It's also a lot of fun to turn off the lights and watch them glow under a blacklight...There is actually a lot of controversy as to the ethics of these fish...I believe they are already illegal in California and perhaps other states will follow suit..While the fish themselves are the ones copying themselves, deliberately breeding and selling them without a license is prohibited. They are chemically sterilized before being sold, but some get by without losing their fertility. As they said in Jurassic Park, Life will find a way..."

Well, life DID find a way here because shortly after I bought the pink glo fish, it became pregnant by the orange male. I have no idea how long it takes for them to have their babies, and even if I did, I don't know when the thing got knocked up. Apparently fish sex is about as quick as sex was during my marriage so it's tough to catch them in the act. Anyway, if these fish are supposed to be sterilized before being sold, how come BOTH of mine were able to do their jobs when it came to creating little glo fish? So far, 100% of the glo fish that I've bought have been quite the fertile little fuckers...no pun intended.

I wonder what this means? I suppose I can look up some more info online and I'm sure that I will. I had no idea that genetically altered creatures were allowed out of a laboratory. Anyway, I have some now and if all goes well, I'll have some more soon. I wonder what color I'll get by mixing a pink genetically altered fish with an orange genetically altered fish? Hell, I wonder what species I'll get!

Anyway, I fed Payton a few minutes ago and I took pictures of his food for you. Isn't that sweet of me? I always give him at least two eggs a week...I used to mix raw eggs up in his dog food but he didn't seem to like it served that way. He DOES seem to like people food so since people cook their eggs (usually) I thought that I'd cook Payton's eggs. I only do it on the weekends so that's why I just did it...it's the weekend!

Anyway, I made him a KABACCO, pronounced just like it's spelled. KABACCO stands for Kibbles and Bits and cheddar cheese omelet. Here's what one looks like:





And just in case you can't tell what they are...here's a close up:





See those kibbles? See those bits? You'll have to trust me on the cheddar cheese. Anyway, I served it with a side of Alpo instead of corned beef hash.

Now I have to feed the cats. They're getting mackerel which was actually cheaper than most cat food. They prefer tuna but I don't have any.

It's been quite a fishy day here. I woke up to two baby fish, one expected and the other a complete surprise. I need to get a breeding net because I know those fish both birthed more than one fish...but only one from each mother survived. Then, in the early evening I learned that I have mutant fish. Ain't life interesting?

I wonder what would happen if some irresponsible fish owner should release these into the wild? I read that some salmon have just about killed off another species of salmon because the first group was genetically altered to survive lower temperatures and grow 5 times as fast as the second species. We seem to be screwing with the balance that nature intended. Of course, my fish are simply one breed with one particular gene altered, the one that causes the colors to be so bright. I would THINK that they would get eaten quickly since they're SO bright.

At Blogiversity.org "mike" commented that:

"...Personally I see them as just a sub species of another species of fish, not a creation of man. I think they are no different than people breeding Poodles and Great Danes. Dogs with mutations deemed as desirable traits were bred to keep these traits. With Glo-Fish ®, they just took a massive shortcut to force the exact mutation they were going for through the DNA..."

What do you think?

Should pet stores should be allowed to sell genetically altered pets as easily as they sell natural pets?
	Sure, why not?
	Yeah but the sales should be monitored.
	No, not under any circumstances!
pollcode.com free polls

PS I just read that these fish are egg layers so the female is just gravid with eggs. I'll find out if the male fertilizes them later and I guess I'll find out whether or not they really are sterile...at this point I don't know! I also read that these are THE most controversial fish in the entire hobby. YIKES!!!

IT'S A FISH!!!

I just noticed...

...two baby fish in my freshwater tank. One of them is a white molly and the mother is still HUGE full of more babies. I don't know when the baby was born or why the mother isn't releasing the rest of them. The other baby is not a molly. I didn't know anyone else was pregnant in there. I have one of my pretty pink fish that's getting pretty big, but this baby wasn't pink. It wasn't white either. I'm starting to think that one of the fancy guppies had a baby I didn't know about because I was so busy watching the other two.

The two babies stay together, they're so tiny that I'm surprised I even saw them. One is maybe 3 mm. and the other maybe 3.5 mm. They're different colors, sizes and shapes. So they certainly aren't siblings but they do seem to hang out next to each other.

I wish my damn digital camera worked because these things are so cool! Tiny fish that are perfect little replicas of the parents...they're so much fun to watch. I'm going to look up some information on breeding the fish, I've bred mollys before but never fancy guppies so I need to figure out what I should do.

:):):)

Good morning!

Actually it's NOT a very good morning because it's been raining all night and Payton HATES the rain. He'll hold his bladder for the entire day to avoid being rained on. He'd pee on the floor while it's raining if I let him, he tried it a couple of times and found himself seriously rained on so he knows not to pee in the house no matter how long it rains.

I'm rather disappointed that he's not smart enough to walk out onto the carport and pee on the bushes that surround the cement. He could do that without one drop of rain touching him and I try to tell him that every time but he stands in the kitchen looking out the door with a look on his face that says, "You might as well just come in bitch, I'm not coming out there no matter how long you stand there pointing at those bushes." It's supposed to rain all day and he hasn't been out yet. I've been up for a long time now and I can't get him outside.

We haven't really had enough rain in Payton's life for him to know what it is. We're in the middle of a drought and I rarely have to wipe up muddy paw prints. So the dog just doesn't have enough rain experience to feel comfortable in the slop. He will come out in the rain to get in the car...but we have a plan we follow, I go out to the car with a towel and cover Payton's route to the backseat, I get in my seat, start the car and say, "OK!" Only then will Payton come running out of the house and jump into the car.

As I typed that last paragraph, I stopped to get some more coffee and as I always do, I backed my chair up. I heard Payton yelp like I'd rolled over a nerve. I think he knows what "I'm sorry" means...I have to say it enough. He seems to be rather forgiving and after the pain went away, he laid down to my side. All 3 of those little farts are lying in here. I should take a picture, damn the mess.

BRB.

Naturally, just as I was about to take the picture, McFly moved over here:

Now the cats have the dog surrounded:

Stewie has found a spider:

The stealthy feline pounces upon his prey:

The next thing you know, a little bug treat for the kitty:

OK, those animals are all still sitting here. Oh! It just occurred to me that I haven't fed them. Jeez, no wonder they're all sitting there staring at me. I guess the spider should have been a hint. Maybe if I don't feed him for a while he'll actually go hunt bugs!

Back soon.

Hello...

...I've been being lazy all morning. So far this is the most productive thing that I've done all day. I think I'd like to cook a nice dinner but it's sort of silly to do that for yourself. I still have some cookies that I baked the week before last so I hesitate to bake a lasagna or something else great for a crowd but silly for one person.

I do have to eat though so I should have bought a bunch of Hot Pockets or something like that. Right now my choices are limited to pot roast, skirt steak and a 5 pound chicken. Of course the cabinets are full of easy kid stuff but I'm not in the mood for Beefaroni. After finding Rick's receipt from dinner with his hoe (I'm not sure of the correct spelling of street slang but you know what I mean), I don't want to order Chinese and I've had McDonald's too much this week already. Payton loves the double cheeseburgers so I take him there every so often. I think I've taken him once too many times because now he barks when he sees a McDonald's sign from the car. Personally, I prefer Burger King but Payton likes McDonald's and it's quite close so I just take him there.

Crap, I might as well go back to the grocery store and buy some easy to fix stuff. Doesn't my day sound exciting? I shouldn't expect much after last night. Someone has been begging me to watch this "great" movie so last night I finally did and it was the dumbest movie I've ever seen.

I read the back of the box and it said something about aliens taking over people in a small town and I knew then that this movie would either be really, really good or really, really bad. If it had been good, I would have heard of it so I was truly bored to even watch it in the first place but I did. It was called PuppetMaster and had little reptilian looking space monsters, zombies and totally STUPID characters. It made me think of Rick during the entire movie. That's because he had this amazing knack for going out to rent movies only to bring back the worst movie that Blockbuster could possible put on it's shelves.

I haven't seen such a rotten movie since the last movie Rick rented. If anyone ever tells you to watch that movie...run quickly away. The fact that they had little reptilian space monsters should be a big red flag...Alien is the only movie that ever got away with that. Anyway, don't watch the movie.

I would love to watch a good movie but I should probably get dressed and leave the house for a while. There's a dog park not far from here and I'm gonna take Payton over there to play with the neighborhood dogs. He likes that more than he likes the battlefield. I guess it's because of all the other dogs...they're all off of leashes and most of them are pretty good with other dogs. It's fun watching them run up to each other when they see a dog they've already met. It's a lot of fun and I'd leave right now if I weren't still in my jammies.

The other morning when Walgreen's called to say by blood pressure medicine was ready, I just ran out in jammy bottoms and a t-shirt. That should have been safe because I was just going to the drive-thru. But the lady in the window dropped my card so I had to A. climb over Payton to get out the passenger door because the driver's door is broken...and B. do so in my pajamas. Walgreen's is on a very busy street and I felt like an idiot. I worry about getting in a wreck but I never think about someone dropping my credit card outside my car. I should really buy some better jammies.

Oh well, one way or another, I should shower, get dressed and primp. Then I can do whatever I want to do. Until then, I'm a pajama slave.

:)

This Post is 100% My Own Opinion---Meg

If you've been reading...

...this blog long enough, you may be aware that I have an aunt who was murdered by her son Paul Mergel. Her name is Mary Ann Mergel and she was my father's sister. Apparently you can get away with murder if you have a good enough hiding place because Aunt Mary Ann's body was never found and it looks like Paul may get away with her murder...as will his accomplice.

When we discovered that she was "missing" and Paul was telling different members of the family different stories about where his mother had gone...I posted a lot of information about the situation.

To my surprise, I began to hear from cousins that I hadn't heard from in years and eventually I started hearing from Paul's father's family. A nephew of Mary's (on her husband's side of the family) was quite close to his aunt too so he read the blog with interest when I discussed our aunt's murder and the OTHER murder that Paul got away with.

Apparently Paul grew bored of an old girlfriend so he burned down the trailer she was sleeping in. Even with the cab driver who dropped him off near the trailer in the middle of the night, the cops in Jersey didn't have enough to arrest him. It seems as though he had an alibi...and he murdered his alibi when he murdered his own mother.

The Georgia police know he is responsible for his mother's disappearance but they don't have enough to bust him either. They did, however, find enough to arrest him for other charges and he was sentenced to a couple years that he had to pull "door to door" meaning that he had to serve every single minute of his sentence. He did eventually get out and my cousin by marriage has been speaking to me to try to get information on his own. It seems as though he and I are 2 of the only people who care to pursue this crime.

The other day we were speaking and I gave him the name of the investigator who I call when I want to check up on the case. Well, he called him and then I got this comment left at the bottom of a post written about our aunt:

"According to authorities in Georgia, there is a WARRANT ISSUED for the arrest of Paul Robert Mergel, for a probation violation pertaining to his 1st degree forgery charge he was convicted of in 2004 and spent two years in jail for. He is also currently being investigated for another case in Hazlet, New Jersey. More to follow..."

This is the post that he commented on:

http://diaryofmydivorce.blogspot.com/2006/11/my-father-read-comment.html

That's about someone who, in my opinion, was Paul pretending to be his own son. I could be wrong but he sounds more like a criminal defending himself than he does a kid defending his father. Notice how the "kid" mentions the mother with such disdain. I can't see too many sons speak like that about their own moms but I can see an ex-husband do it.

Anyway, I wanted to put this out there because if anyone should see Paul Mergel, I would hope that they would call the Georgia authorities in Murray County. Let me go see if I can get a picture of the bum and the number for the cops. I'll be right back.

Murray County Sheriff's Department: 1-706-695-4593 Detective Brent Morrison

This is information I found on the Ga. DOC file on Paul:

YOB: 1967
RACE: WHITE
GENDER: MALE
HEIGHT: 5'09''
WEIGHT: 205
EYE COLOR: BLUE
HAIR COLOR: BROWN
TATTOO/MEDIUM ANKLE/RT
TATTOO/MEDIUM ARM/RT
TATTOO/LARGE ARM/LFT
A.K.A. MERGEL,PAUL ROBERT SR
A.K.A. MERGEL,PHANTOM MAN

Here's a picture of the sweetheart of a son:




Now I'm going to feed the animals and make some coffee. Then I'll write a normal post.

:)

Oh, by the way, thanks to my cuz for the info!

Damn...

...I'm starting to wonder if I have Alzheimer's. I keep forgetting why I've walked into another room and I always have to go back where I started to remind myself what the hell I wanted in the first place. I don't know why that helps...but it does.

This morning I found myself looking in the cabinet where I keep cans of dog and cat food...just staring into the stupid cabinet...and I didn't have a clue why I opened the stupid door. I was getting ready to leave the house for a few minutes and I was in a hurry. But, instead of starting the car, I was staring into a cabinet in my kitchen without a clue of what I was looking for. I asked myself, "What WOULD you be looking for in this cabinet?" That helped because I also keep the garbage bags in there and that's what I was looking for. I wanted to have a trash bag in the car. OK then...I made my way to the store and back without forgetting where I live.

I've always stared into my fridge...you have to watch those every minute. But I usually don't stare into cabinets. I must have some disease that lowers the intelligence because yesterday as I was cleaning out a cabinet, I found a receipt from a Chinese Restaurant down the street from here dated when I was in Chicago visiting my daughter before I had the surgery that I thought would kill me.

I came back from that trip to find that Rick had bought new clothes...shorts and a sleeveless t-shirt...not quite work material. then I found a sandy bottle of KY Jelly in a drawer. So, while I was gone he had some fun at the beach and down the street from our home... and he also had sex with someone whom he couldn't turn on too much or else he wouldn't have needed the KY crap. That's why I call it foreplay in a bottle...that's about Rick's speed.

He must have known how stupid I was. Of course, he could have been trying to get caught...this stuff was there before he left and I was clueless. I heard one too many, "I don't go anywhere but work!" lines to think he was cheating...he didn't go anywhere but work. Of course when I was out doing stand-up, I had no clue what he was doing.

When I found that receipt yesterday, it gave me a little sting in the heart. I didn't expect that and I wasn't happy about it. I have no idea how many more nice little surprises I have hiding in this house just waiting for me to find them. This sucker must have fallen out of the back of a drawer because I've cleaned them all out but I guess I haven't cleaned out the cabinet with the big bowls and Tupperware for a long, long time. I wish I hadn't done it this time...it wasn't really dirty. I was just sitting on the kitchen floor putting contact paper in the cabinet under the kitchen sink. As long as I was down there, I decided to clean out all of the lower cabinets and that's how I found this little gem:







I just noticed that there was no tip included so that makes me think they had Chinese delivered to the house...or he picked it up. Rick hated Chinese food (except for Sweet and Sour chicken which he got whenever he went to a Chinese restaurant. But we only went because I wanted to go...he would have gone to the cheaper McDonald's around the corner). I don't know if you can read it or not, but it's from the Maple Gardens down the street and it's dated June 11th 2004. I was absolutely in Chicago visiting my daughter on that date. Of that I am 100% sure.

Now I have to go back to the store...the pharmacy just called to say that they got my blood pressure medicine in and the one thing my brain doesn't need now is high blood pressure. You know, if Rick would have stayed here, I'd be dead by now...that's another thing of which I am 100% sure...I never could have kept my blood pressure under control with this shit going on.

So...there's a reason for everything and that may be the reason that God let this happen to me.

Ya think?

I just spoke to my father...

...and he surprised me. He told me what happened when he spoke to Jean's daughter...he was as shocked as was I. The chick actually took it quite hard. Oddly enough, she just asked for some details surrounding the death out of curiosity like, "Did she suffer? What happened?" Other than that, she just acted shocked and saddened. But she didn't ask about the services and unless she does, she won't have a clue when to come to Florida so it doesn't look like she's coming but she might surprise me yet.

For some reason, it takes a week to have a service for someone who has been cremated and that's what Jean wanted. So her services won't be until the first weekend in May. I'll probably fly down there next Thursday to help my dad get it all together. He's already sounding overwhelmed but as usual, he tries to act like he's got it all covered. I'm sure he could use the help, at least when it comes to cleaning her stuff and packing it away. He would sit there and look at every single piece of clothing or silver and stare at it crying for a while. I can just toss the stuff in the box and get on with it. I don't have millions of memories attached to all of her belongings.

Once she asked me if I would take Sydney, her cat, if anything should happen to her. I told her that I would because my father doesn't like cats. But while I was there, my father seemed to be rather close to Sydney, surprisingly enough. He would talk about what a good, smart cat she is...she's actually just a cat, nothing special...but don't we all think our own animals are adorable? If my dad feels the need to brag about the cat, he may very well be too attached to it for me to take it. But I'll make the offer to honor my word anyway.

I don't really need another cat. I'm already in danger of being called the "cat lady down the street" and I don't need to make the appellation stick. If I look around the room that I'm in, any room, any time...I can see 2 cats and a big ass dog forming a triangle of animals around me. I don't want to be surrounded by a square. Besides, Stewie isn't fixed yet and that could make a complete hexadecagon and that simply can't be. So, I may or may not be having an additional cat soon. I sure the heck hope my father is in such a state of grief that he wants to keep Sydney around.

It would be the irony of ironies to see my father with his own cat. The man has hated cats for his entire life. He doesn't like anyone else's dogs either. He liked ours while we were growing up although many of them did seem to go "to the vet" only to never return. That had to be his doing...my mother wouldn't have minded anything that a dog did unless he bit one of her kids. I could almost see him with a dog, but my father living with a cat is like Archie and Meathead living together. You just wouldn't expect to see it. I'm sure anyone who knows my father would get a kick out of him living alone with a cat.

I could tell he was upset this morning. I asked him if it was nice and quiet and he said, "Deafeningly quiet." so I'm sure he's missing her already. You know, he's in such good shape for a man who is going to be 74 next month that I don't really think of him as being old...he's just Dad. And with Jean there, even as sick as she was...I didn't worry as much as I will now that he's alone. He had a medical problem once before and he required an ambulance. That day Jean actually saved his life by calling 911. She couldn't have done that last week, but last year she could.

I know my dad wants me to move near him and I probably should. But it's been tough enough to get up and leave this house. I've been here since the mid 90's and I should have left right after Rick did but moving is never convenient. Between my son and my grandkids...I have to have the room that I have here. Now I have to figure out how to do this...worrying about older parents is never fun.

You know, I was thinking about something...I'll never know for sure, but I bet that Jean's smoking helped her go so soon. Her mother lived well into her 90's with Alzheimer's and if Jean didn't smoke so much, she could have lived that long as well. So, smoking saved her from a slow, hideous death. They don't put this on the sides of the cigarettes:

The Surgeon General has determined that smoking may kill you before you end up in a nursing home.

Yeah...that's another reason to smoke.

OK, I should check out flights to Tampa...I'm not in the mood to drive again so soon.

:)

This afternoon...

...at about noon, my stepmother passed away after she stopped breathing yesterday. Before Alzheimer's Disease robbed her of her brain, she was a bright, witty and funny lady. She was one of the best bridge players in the world, literally. She married my father in 1990 and even though they divorced, they remained together for almost the entire time since they married. My father cared for her for two years while she battled Alzheimer's, kidney failure and COPD.

She will be missed.

Meg

Good morning!

I woke up at about 5 AM and let the dog out. I figured I would just get back under the covers until he came to the window to be let in. The next thing I knew it was almost 9 AM. I should have just stayed up when I woke up in the first place but I love to "snooze" and I always set at least two alarms so that I can safely and gently snooze my ass awake. I hate getting out of bed in the morning. It's almost painful. I hate to sleep late, but I hate to actually get OUT of the bed. That's the hardest thing I do in the course of a day...once I am off the bed and sipping coffee...it doesn't matter what the rest of the day holds...the hard part is over.

So, I guess my day will be all downhill until my favorite part of the day...bedtime. I love that time that I spend in my pretty girlie room with my dog lying on the foot of my bed. I watch TV until I get sleepy. I can fall asleep a few times before I finally just let myself drift off. I'm always trying to watch the end of something before I do go to sleep.

So, my favorite part of the day is the part where I get IN my bed and my worst part of the day is when I get out of it. Too bad I can't get in it without having to get out of it. Oh well, life could be much worse.

It's not going so well for Jean right now. I'm still waiting to hear from my father as to what they're going to do. The last time I spoke to him he said that the neurologist would be in sometime last night to assess her CNS and see if they need to just pull the plug. It's odd, yesterday morning, the ER doc was more than happy to pull the plug when he saw Jean, after all, the EMT's never should have restarted her breathing since she has a signed No Code order. Then, when her own doctors got there, they all started doing tests. I can't believe that they'd bother with thousands and thousands of dollars of tests to find out that she died yesterday.

This is how people end up on all sorts of machines before they die...they slowly get one machine to fix one thing and then they add more to fix other stuff and before you know it, they're in a room full of machinery that could be used for someone who may have a chance to survive. It may sound awful but when someone is brain dead...should they really be taking up a bed that could be used for someone who has a shot at life? If the family wants to keep them around, they can...at home. Even a nursing home would be better than an acute care hospital. The absolute BEST result possible for Jean is that she come out of the coma with brain damage to some degree and Alzheimer's. Oh, and she takes her dialysis too. They dialyze her Monday, Wednesday and Friday at a cost to the taxpayers of over 10 grand a week. The nephrologist who owns that dialysis clinic is making money hand over fist. If you ever wanted to know where your tax dollars go...walk into a dialysis center...for every patient there they make 10 grand a week.

I wouldn't think that was a bad idea if Jean was healthy and had some quality of life to look forward to...but she doesn't have anything to look forward to at all. She couldn't look forward to anything if she wanted to...she would forget what she was looking forward to in ten minutes time.

And still her daughter won't so much as make a phone call. She has no clue what shape her mother is in. She never gave her Mom her phone number so all they have is an email address for her. I was in Florida for well over a month and not one family member called to check on the woman. I felt so badly for her. She's going to live with some hideous guilt one day soon. You would think that her husband would care enough about her to talk some sense into her and get her to take two days to come and see her mother before she dies. But for all I know, the husband is manipulating the chick into keeping the argument going on. That's more of a female thing to do but men could be mean enough to do it too.

Anyway...I just hope that Jean doesn't feel any pain, I don't think she does.

I just walked into my bedroom and the blankets on my bed were pulled over from where I took them off of me as I got off of it this morning. The bed was talking to me saying, "Come back, come back...we need you to curl up under the blankets and make us warm...if you do, we'll wrap you up and hold all of your warmth in us and all around you. All you have to do is plop yourself down and pull the blankets over you...it's that easy!"

That bed is such an ass...it didn't even mention that if I do get in...sooner or later I'll have to get back out.

Yuck...I'm going through a few weeks of puking a few times a day. It's a good thing that I have no appetite...if I did puking would be a lot worse than it already is. If this doesn't stop soon I may just take my bed up on it's offer.

OK...this is stupid...I'll be back after my stomach stops rejecting every single thing that enters it. Apparently Kool-Aid isn't one of my stomach's favorite things.

:)

My father just called me...

...to tell me that Jean stopped breathing this morning while she was at dialysis. The EMT's didn't know that she had a Do Not Resuscitate order so they restored her breathing and put her on a ventilator. The doctors asked my father if he wanted them to pull the plug. He called me to ask me what to do. I told him that he should leave it to God and let them pull the plug. He's on his way to the hospital to be next to her when they do pull it. He'll be calling me when they see what happens after they stop the vent. I'll be back to let you know what happens.

Meg

Here are two of my buddies...

...hanging out at my feet. They're so sweet. All those yahoos who said that I would never be able to control such a big dog were wrong. I control him quite well. When he walks to the back yard to be stuck outside for some transgression, he doesn't even try to run off...he just heads right to the gate. I would hate to have animals who liked to escape. I'd go nuts every time they took off...judging by how I reacted when Stewie was gone all day. (That's Stewie in the picture with Payton.)

The grandkids were here all weekend and I totally enjoyed them. I spent too much money on them but it's tough to say "No." to their little faces. Besides getting the toys for the kids, a BUNCH of winter clothes were on clearance with prices so cheap that it was an offer that I could not refuse.

And then I found some towels and washcloths on sale that were just the perfect color for my bathroom which I am in the process of redecorating. I had put it off because the wall had so many imperfections and I didn't know what was behind the wallpaper. Then I thought up a really good idea...I'll just get a trowel and apply some sort of adobe looking pattern that I can paint over. Any imperfections would be totally hidden by the glop that I'd put on the walls. So, now I can't wait to get the job done. I've chosen my colors...a pale dusty rose and white. That is to continue the theme of my entire bedroom.

I've created a bedroom that is exactly the kind of room that I would love. I haven't been able to have a room like that because there was always a man around saying, "That looks too girly...AND NO FLOWERS...ANYWHERE!" So, my room is entirely girly and includes flowers EVERYWHERE!!! From the oil paintings to the contact paper lining my drawers...you'll see flowers, flowers and more flowers. And, where you don't see flowers, you see butterflies. My goal was to create a room that a man wouldn't want to spend too much time in. They'll come in for as long as I let them...but then they have to leave when I'm done with them.

Here is my flowerdy room:

And my view from the bed:

See my lantern? I light it everynight when I watch TV before I fall asleep. Between that and the red light bulbs in the fan as well as both bedside lamps, the room has quite the bordello look to it. I do have one light that I use when I need to see...one of those clamp on lights that you can move and point anywhere you want to have light. But I find that I rarely have a need for bright lights in the bedroom. I like the pink glow in my pretty room.

Anyway, my point was that I spent money that I hadn't expected to spend. And my granddaughter is NOT a cheap kid. She's like me...everything she looks at has a RIDICULOUS price tag on it. In my case I can easily walk away, that little girl hasn't learned to walk away yet, at least not without pouting. I had to convince her that the box filled with fake nails, glitter and lots of nail decorations that had a picture of the Bratz on it could be purchased for a fraction of the price in the nail section without paying 25 bucks for the Bratz picture. That was tough...but I pulled it off.


Oh, what I had planned on saying was that after the kids left, everyone else left as well. So, I've been completely, peacefully and quietly alone in my own home for close to 20 hours. But I just answered the phone which was, in hindsight...a stupid thing to do. My alone time will be coming to an end very soon. Ain't that a bitch?

Oh well, it was fun while it lasted. I've finally gotten to the point where I enjoy living alone. I couldn't imagine letting someone come into my life and screw things up. The first thing I'd have to do is redecorate the bedroom again and I really haven't even finished it my way yet. I still have walls that need something and who can have too many pretty sheets and quilts? Not I. I wouldn't mind doing a room up all manly style...but it should be a different room. After a lifetime of wanting a pretty bedroom, I'm going to enjoy mine for a while.

Actually, I haven't REALLY been enjoying it for quite a while now. I haven't had anyone in there in months. It's getting sad...I'm back to being celibate without the intention to be celibate. I just am celibate for lack of decent prospects. Besides, getting laid is easy...just lower your standards and you'll get "lucky". I refuse to lower my standards anymore. I'd rather stay single and sleep alone in my pretty, pretty bedroom.

When I finish the bathroom, it will be perfect! I can't wait!

Back in May of '05...

...I had my license suspended. That didn't stop me from driving though...I don't know why...but it didn't. I HAD to go to work so I did. I used to have a real problem driving anywhere near the speed limit. I usually drove, at the very least, 5 miles over the limit. If the speed limit had more room, like 65, I would have gone at least ten miles over the limit.

I had this arrogant attitude that said, "I'm not driving any faster than I can handle the car...I know what I'm doing." I even drove over 80 MPH with my left foot out the driver's window. (That was over 25 years ago. I'd NEVER do that now.) I did stupid stuff, I admit. But I never hit anything after I had 3 quick fender benders as a teenager. All three of those accidents were caused by me listening to someone else. Either some guy behind me honked, the person next to me said, "GO!", or the truck driver coming from the left told me it was clear. If I hadn't listened to those people, I would be able to say that I've NEVER gotten into a wreck. So, I don't EVER...UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES...listen to anyone else. Honk all day, the nut from the left can just go on and get out of my line of sight and the person sitting in the car with me all might as well give up, I totally block them out. I refuse to listen to a word they say when it has to do with my driving.

Until I hit something, I'll keep on ignoring other people. Damn, did I digress or what? I forgot what I was talking about...wait a sec. Oh yeah.

Anyway, when my license was suspended, I got stopped for speeding. The cops had physically taken my license but I found one that I had lost a while back. So, I gave the man that license. Somehow I mentioned that it might be suspended and he called the dispatch people to run wants and warrants and to see if my license was good. I lucked out...the computer was down. He couldn't arrest me and impound the car which is what they do.

When I finally went to court, they knew that my license was suspended so they charged me with that and then they lowered it to driving without a valid license...apparently not as bad as driving with a suspended license. I didn't have the money to pay for that ticket so I didn't. My license was already suspended and when I said that I couldn't afford the 500 bucks they wanted, the lady said, "Well, if you don't pay it, we'll suspend your license."

I said, "It's already suspended."

To which she replied, "We'll suspend it again.

So I retorted, "What does that mean...I really REALLY can't drive?"

Between that and another driving with a suspended license (once again, I got out without going to jail or having the car impounded. I did get lucky occasionally...not that it's worth it.) I had a LOT of fines and I was out of the state when I had the court date for the speeding ticket that I mentioned early on in this post so technically I had a failure to appear but they never put a warrant out for me. When I finally had the money to pay the fines, I went to court and took care of it myself. No one knew why they didn't issue a bench warrant.

After my little stint in the county lock up, I never ever wanted to go back so I TOTALLY stopped driving until I did get my license back. It was still sort of scary to drive for a while...I had been without one for so long. Anyway, I've had it for so long that I'm used to it again.

I slowly took care of all the tickets and fines that I had to pay and today was the last one. I now have absolutely NOTHING in the future so far as court dates go. My license is perfect and by November of this year, ALL of that crap will be over 3 years old so then my insurance will go back down.

Anyway, I'm fine but with my luck, I've just jinxed myself. OMG...I hope I don't get any tickets within the next week...or worse yet, get into a wreck. Ick...I hate to even think about it especially when I'm driving away for the weekend. And I'm doing so with my record and license all taken care of and that feels nice.

Do you know what this means? It means that I can afford a speeding ticket.

:):):)

I've been thinking...

...a lot about the polygamist cult in Texas that has had all of their kids taken away. I waffle on whether or not the government did the right thing. It's certainly easy enough to justify...we "normal" citizens can sit haughtily in our "normal" environment and belittle, bemean and besmirk all who dare deviate from the standards that we have set for all to follow. Of course, sometimes we do so "for the sake of the children" and I understand that. Trying to keep emotion out of an emotional issue may be difficult, but it is necessary.

Most, if not all, religions that I have ever heard of have, at one time or another, relegated women to second class citizens at best. The Bible itself says that women are to obey men and then it goes on to say that we are "dirty" during our natural monthly reminder that we are not pregnant. We've come a long way since then, but it took thousands of years. This cult is just a bit behind us.

I understand the reason that people think it's awful to marry off young women and then have them get pregnant. I just wish that they would look at their own daughters. Why can't they begin at home? How many 15 year old mothers are there out in the world with no father in site? I'm not saying that justifies what the 50 year old men are doing to those young women...but I don't know why we can't protect our own daughters from ANY men OR boys who want to use them for their own sexual pleasure.

Doctors don't have to report a 15 year old pregnant girl to the cops if the male who knocked her up is of a certain age. How silly is that? We prosecute 16 year-olds for crimes every day. Why can't we prosecute them for underage sex? I suppose someone will say, "Oh, kids are gonna try sex, you can't stop them!"

Well SURE you can. It just takes time and effort. And the nice thing is that it takes less time than it takes to build a day care center in the local high school. We make it easy on our girls to have babies. When there were consequences...when you had to have a husband to have a baby or society would look down on you...you tried really really hard not to get pregnant. Certainly some did and things were tough for them. But it's not tough enough now. Our society not only allows teenaged pregnancy...it subsidizes it. And in this society, I can't send my kid to school with an aspirin but the school can send him home with a condom.

There's nothing good about this cult. Actually, I did hear that they seemed to eat a very good diet...but other than that...everything sucks. Even the dresses suck. They remind me of my sophomore year Homecoming dress. But I do think that they could have just taken the men away and lessened the trauma to the kids. They can have all the court proceedings that they want to...just let the kids stay at home. If the men aren't there, the kids are safe enough for the time being.

So why did the cops take the kids instead of the fathers? Because they want to "be sure that the parents don't try to put words in the kids mouths". The cops are gonna keep the kids quiet. Can you say McMartin Pre-school?

As odd as we find the cult to be, they are in America and they have the right to practice whatever religion that they want to. Of course, they can't abuse children in the name of the Lord...but the fact that they live off on their own shouldn't be a bad thing in and of itself. Why does the government always refer to these places as "compounds"? Are they trying to manipulate us with the words they choose? Will they do that to the kids in their custody?

The fact that these people have gone off and lived outside of society is something to consider. They took those kids out of the only culture that they've ever known and dumped them in the middle of a world that's entirely foreign to them. And suddenly those mothers don't have their kids. Maybe they shouldn't...but due process is a right...not a nicety.

I don't think that the kids were in any imminent danger although I understand why some people said that they do. But in most cases of child abuse, the cops arrest the abuser and leave the child home with the non-abusive parent. So why are these people being treated differently?

Hi Hi!!!

I've had a long, long day. I spent hours dusting, vacuuming, moving furniture and I still have to line a couple more cabinets. I finally went to Home Depot and got myself another roll of contact paper. That stuff is expensive! I'm gonna go to Family Dollar next time. Six bucks for a 25 foot long roll. The seventy-five foot roll is eighteen bucks...no savings there. Anyway, some of the cabinets are cleaned out already, I just need to empty them and line the bottoms and the shelves. Of course, other cabinets haven't been cleaned in months so they won't be any fun. I'll be throwing a LOT of stuff away. That's hard for me to do because I just KNOW that I'll need it as soon as I toss it.

I want my house to be ready to pack up in 20 minutes should I have to leave quickly. If you like to go dumpster diving, my trash is gonna be better than any dumpster you could dive into.

I'm about to finish the post about the cult in Texas but I wanted to say hello first just to let you know I haven't forgotten about you.

Oh...for hours I was trying to get this house warm with a couple of space heaters. I couldn't figure out why they weren't getting the place any warmer. I went around and shut all the windows and doors then I waited for a while and it wasn't any warmer. My room was particularly cold even though there's a space heater in there and the doors are shut. I just figured that the heater wasn't working.

At one point, I went into the kitchen to throw something away. I always put the trash can where I want it and my son always puts it where HE wants it. He puts it right in front of the central air vent thing. Why he would want to either cook or freeze the trash is beyond me. But, since he had stuck the trashcan over there again, I felt the cold air when I threw the trash away. That nit wit put the AC on and it wasn't the least bit hot here. I was just glad that no one was here to watch me closing the windows and checking the heaters when the air was on the whole time.

OK...I'm gonna go finish that post...back soon.

Excuse the spacing...Blogger periodically has a problem with that.

Sorry I didn't come back last night...

...I took some phenergan for nausea and it knocked me out for the night.

Yesterday while I was volunteering at the Humane Society of Cobb County, I was also thinking about how much I wanted to tell you guys about that place. First of all...the ladies who work there were great. Every single one of them went around to all the animals and gave them each some affection. They also knew the names of ALL of the animals they have there. You can tell how much they adore their animals. Secondly, it's a no-kill shelter and they keep the animals until they find a home. That means that some of those animals have spent their entire lives (years!!!) there.

Some of those animals are really, really sad cases although none of them have life too easy. One of the cats is a beautiful, pure white cat who is deaf. She's a sweetheart and she would make a great pet for a family with a deaf child or the house cat of a school for the deaf. Of course, you wouldn't have to be deaf to adopt her...but if there is a parent of a deaf child within driving distance of Marietta, go get that cat! You'll never be sorry and your child could learn so much from having a deaf pet. Here she is:



They also have rabbits, ferrets, hamsters, gerbils and all different kinds of birds. People are paying a lot of money for animals from pet shops when they could be picking up these animals at the Humane Society for an adoption fee. Oh! I forgot the chinchillas! They have 2 beautiful chinchillas who are so gentle that you can feed them raisins by hand without fear of being bitten. The shelter only takes gentle animals so that there's a chance of finding them a home. You simply cannot go wrong adopting a pet from this place. This rabbit is much prettier than the pictures shows, he looks like a Siamese cat:




Then they have a dog who everyone thinks is a pure bred beagle. His name is ADD which stands for Another Darling Dog. And he most certainly is a darling dog. He's about a year old and he's another perfect pet for a family with small kids. The dog is pretty small (my dog is so big that most others look small to me.) and wouldn't knock over a kid over 3 feet tall. He is so playful that you can't walk by him without hearing him whine for you to come and let him out. Thhe shelter lets the dogs play with each other and this one is very good with other dogs. He just needs a family...really badly. As gentle as he is, it's too bad that he hasn't anyone to love him. Look at this little sweetie:

Here is Copper...a beagle dachsund mix. He's Add's buddy. They spend their days together so they both would make great companions for a lone dog who spends a lot of time at home alone. Seperation anxiety can be fixed easily with another dog. Meet Copper, a great watch dog because he thinks he is a German Shepherd:

Of course, they have more cats than anything else. It's so cool to work with them because you get to see the different cat personalities. Some of them try to jump into your arms as you change the food bowls. They're the ones who are tough to walk away from. They obviously want a person to cuddle with.

Almost all of the cats are adults. One of them is the mother of a litter that were all adopted out. A lot of the females are like that...the mother comes in with a litter of kittens and they find homes for all of the kittens but the mothers are left there, in a cage...for life or until someone comes and takes them home. The one I mentioned is one of the sweet little cats that needs attention. She loves people and could really use a family to call her own. Here she is, she was a kitten when she had kittens and she's been in the shelter ever since...2 years:

These adult cats are perfect for old people who live alone. Little old ladies love it when cats cuddle up on their laps and these are the types of cats who would do that. Also, pets make older people feel needed and that's a good thing. No matter how much we need our grown children, it's nice to have someone to take care of on a daily basis. So, if you know of an older person who lives alone, come and get them a sweet, affectionate cat and watch how quickly they fall in love with it.

All of these animals are fixed and have their shots. They're also quite healthy and parasite free. The people who get an animal from the Humane Society of Cobb County (or any no-kill shelter) will have an animal that requires very little veterinary care.

If you are in the Marietta area, stop by and ask the ladies about the animals they have. (Tell them Meg sent you!) Let them know what you're looking for and they'll tell you which animal would best suit you and your family. You won't have any training phase to go through, just an animal who's already proven itself to be a safe and gentle soul. If you don't live around here but you know someone who does...please forward this to them. If I can find a home for just ONE of those animals, it would make my year.

I'm sure that there's a no-kill shelter close to you...find out and post it here so that more people know about them.

Here's the link to the page with pictures of most of the animals:

http://www.humanecobb.org/adoptions.htm

Interesting...






I never thought of that. Of course, by the time I figured out HOW to make a video, I wasn't angry enough to bother with such non-sense. That's not to say that I wouldn't have done it if I could...I probably would have done it. I started the blog and I never would have thought that I would have done that. I can't even go back and read the early posts because I had totally forgotten that I ever wrote some of that stuff. I tried to read it once and I ended up deleting a couple of posts before I just decided to stop reading it. There were too many things that I would have deposted, there wouldn't be much of a blog left if I did that. So, I don't bother with reading what I write after I write it.

I had a great day. I did volunteer work at the Humane Society of Cobb County. I loved every minute of it and I hope they call me back soon. Some of the stuff wasn't too much fun...like scooping cat shit out of the litter boxes. But walking the dogs was a LOT of fun. So was feeding them all, I would stop and give them all a few minutes of affection.

Of course I wanted to take every single one of them home with me but I think I've filled my quota. There was one that looked EXACTLY like McFly, my older cat. I wanted to take him home just to mess with people who know that I only have one cat. I'd enjoy watching them wonder how that one cat gets around so much and then I'll get to see the looks on their faces when both cats walk in the same room.

Ooh, I have to puke. BRB.

OK...I have to lie down for a little while because I suddenly feel like shit. These things don't last too long so I'll be back shortly.

I'm working on a post...

...about the kids in Texas. But I have to run to the doctor to find out when I can go back to work. In the meantime, I need to see how you all feel about this so I've created a poll. I'd appreciate it if you would take part in it, you don't have to answer ANY question except the question that I asked.

I have to run...see ya later today!

pollcode.com free polls

Do you think that the government had the right to take over 400 children from the mothers in Texas?

Yes No It would have made more sense to simply remove the men. Those women were an imminent danger to the well being of the children.

You know...

...for someone who can be so smart about some things, I can be quite the savant when it comes to other things. I don't want to rag on Rick...I'm not even angry at him anymore. We get along just fine and that's the way it should be. Is he telling me the truth 100% of the time? Hell no. He's lucky if he's honest 50% of the time. He has a habit of telling you exactly what he thinks you want to hear and he puts forth such a decent front that you would NEVER expect him to be lying so you doubt yourself when things don't make sense.

I'm writing about how a lie affects a person...I'm not whining about Rick himself. That's just where I took my lessons so he is in the story.

To this day...either I find something or I remember something. This past February I found those 2 pair of panties, one red and one black. I thought they were my sister's and if Rick had been here, that's what he would have told me. There was the KY Lube "foreplay in a bottle" that I found cleaning out a kitchen drawer. Then there was a time when I was doing stand up and this dude who wanted me to be in his act paid me in a tiny bit of weed. I brought it home, showed it to Rick, hid it and went to sleep. I never saw that little bit of weed again. I didn't figure out that he took it until last year when I painted my room. I took EVERYTHING out of the closet, drawers and out from under the bed. If that tiny bag was still there, I would have found it. So, I finally got it through my thick head...Rick took it and shared it with his girlfriend. I didn't even figure that out one morning when he told me that he had NOT taken any pot to work. Then, as he kissed me good bye, I put my hand on his chest (innocently...not searching...I believed him TOTALLY) and when I did, I felt two fat joints in his chest pocket. I can't believe it took me so long to figure out that he was cheating...what a MORON I am!

The other day, during a very pleasant conversation, I asked him if he took that weed. He found a GREAT answer to that question..."If I did, I don't remember doing it. But, I'm not going to say that I did or did NOT do it...I just don't know.

Isn't that perfect? A confession without an actual admission of guilt. Good one, 'ey? That'll shut a person up and most of what Rick said to me was for the express purpose of shutting me up. (That is, of course, if I were asking questions at the time and his bullshit wasn't working.)

Spending so much time with my father showed me something...I doubt that I could have learned as much in 20 years of psychoanalysis. I spent my entire childhood wondering what I had done to make him mad at me. And then, I married Rick who took over and assured that most of my adult life was spent the same way. For some reason, I had put Rick on some sort of pedestal and when he lied, he was so good at it that I wondered what was wrong with ME...just like I did when I was growing up. Both my father and Rick made me feel as though I was the one who was bad...and I had BOTH of them on pedestals. I respected them both so much that I couldn't believe that either one could be wrong or lie...so it HAD to be me...right?

Hearing Rick say that sentence, "If I did, I don't remember...", took me back to how I felt when I suspected that he had lied to me. It always went like this:

1. I asked him a question.
2. He denied anything and everything.
3. I ended up believing him, feeling guilty for ever questioning the man and I even felt sorry for him because he was so damned good at coming across as the victim.
4. Two weeks later it would start over again.

He never, ever admits the truth unless you have him on tape. And then, the "truth" he admits to is never as bad as is the real truth. If backed into a corner, he would admit to something...but never the truth. A hickey came from a 16 year old hitch-hiker who he would never see again. He didn't mention the 40 year old skank that he was screwing at the time...Louisa May Wilson.

I graduated from college when I was the single mother of 3 small children. I had to wake up early enough to take the baby to a private sitter, the pre-schooler to pre-school and the school aged kid to the church where they had a program for kids who had to wait for the school bus in the morning or the parents in the afternoon. I did that for years to get my degree. People always asked me, "How did you ever do all of that by yourself?"

I know now that it was exactly BECAUSE I was by myself. I didn't have anyone to worry about except myself. There's no one around to preoccupy my time and make me wonder what I'm doing to deserve any guilt feelings. There's no one around to make me feel so badly about myself that I'm afraid to try anything new for fear of failing. That's what happens to a person who spends decades questioning themselves. So...I didn't have anything special that helped me to accomplish so much as a single mother, I just didn't have anyone around to make me constantly question myself.

I don't think that these guys ever think these things through so much as to do this specifically to cause such harm. They just don't think about that at all. The only thing they're thinking about is getting away with something.. Of course, the comments meant to shut you up are manipulative...they're there to make you feel so badly that you DO shut up...but most of the time I doubt that these guys (or girls) are working that hard on other people.

I remember exactly where I was the moment it occurred to me that Rick didn't belong on the pedestal that I put him on. I was turning a corner on Franklin Road in Roanoke Virginia. Halfway through the turn, about the time I began accelerating...I had an epiphany...Rick wasn't a very nice guy. He certainly wasn't as decent as I thought he was. At that time I had known Rick for 10 years. It took me that long to figure him out. He was good at what he did and I was good at wondering what I had done wrong.

You can't accomplish much when you're constantly trying to fix relationships with people who don't care as much as you do.